The Epitome of a Man

He arrived true to who he was. His look made her giggle like a school girl who balanced on the edge of desire. She watched him for a moment as he set his ride to the side. He slowly exposed who he was behind the facade that most could not see through. She walked toward him patiently taking in that first moment that was never to be again. She was enveloped in his presence before she even had a chance to see his eyes. She could feel him. For the first time in her life she needed not to look into the soul of the one who stood before her, his being was all around her, drawing her in like a curious child.

He shed his armour as she approached. He removed the lenses that kept his distance from the world that surrounded them. In that moment she knew by the look in his eyes that he was the kindred spirit she was meant to embrace.

The Angels that brought them together swirled around in their presence with light that would shine upon the Gods forever with the love they brought together.

A true gentleman, he reached politely for her hand with his, that adorned a story she needed to hear. The moment his hand touched hers she felt his entirety. There would be no regret in this first moment together. She reached out, opening her vulnerability and wrapped her arms around him. Her exposed cheek gently touched the hair that cloaked his jaw. The tender skin that covered her heart could feel his beat through the leather that protected his core. Her inner thigh brushed his ever so slightly sending her to a place she barely recognized. He emanated the truth he held deep within his soul.

…and then he spoke, and her heart began to open.

His gentle tone and eloquent choice of words assured her that he was deep with meaning and filled with love. As she gazed across the table listening and feeling his truth, his passion and desire captured her wrapping her safety in his arms.

He was the epitome of a man…

Tracy ~

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Beating for Love ~

 

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When did I stop jumping into love with my eyes wide open, fearlessly filled with passion? Feeling the wind beneath my wings, sweeping me away has become a distant memory. I struggle to extend my arms to reach for his, as he walks toward me with his heart on his sleeve. He is not afraid of love. He too has fought for love and lost but survived.

When did a leap of faith become a fear? When did my heart stop beating for love?

Our heart is not meant to be guarded and held safely behind the walls of our chest. If hurt and pain have brought me here, I have no choice but to put my heart in the hand of the devil and ask my angels for forgiveness. Forgiveness for not opening my heart or scaling my walls in search of freedom, for the pure purpose of love.

I want to care not, where the path will lead, with whom I will walk it and for how long the journey will last. For the details of this are not what’s important, but only that you are willing.

Why do I shy away from the hand that reaches out to touch my soul? When did my heart stop beating for love? When did my heart stop beating for love? When did my heart stop beating for love?

I shall surrender to myself and allow my heart to start beating to the rhythm of love. Love is the meaning of life itself. Love is meant to feed our minds and free our souls. Love is meant to be.

Life flows through our veins allowing us to feel our existence beyond our human flesh. We were created to love. We were created in love. We are love.

Age and Wisdom have brought me here…ready to love again.

Tracy

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I Miss…

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The strength of a man standing at my side.
The unexpected kiss on my temple. I miss hands on my cheeks, when his lips touch mine. His gentle strength that guides me through the crowd.

I miss the feeling of being safe, tucked under his arm. I miss pausing to gaze at his hand holding the door. I miss the scent that stays in my sheets when he’s gone. I miss sleeping in the shirt he left behind.

I miss being pulled in tight when it wasn’t time. I miss hearing his heart beat in the still of the night. I miss being awakened by a touch so light. I miss the look that he gives me from across the room.

I miss when he moves my hair to the side, so his lips can leave a kiss goodbye. I miss the sound that he makes when I touch his side. I miss the warmth of his breath on a cold winter day, warming my neck, wanting to stay.

I miss feeling his skin come alive in the room. The energy we create only inches away. I miss feeling him lose complete control, as our bodies start to feel a flow. I miss dancing in a quiet room, candles, music, slight perfume.

I miss having a man care for my soul, holding my heart not wanting to go.

I miss…

~Tracy

 

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Intimacy…

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Intimacy…the ultimate sexy! Being drawn to someone without control is a feeling that many of us only experience once in a lifetime. It’s a magical force between two who connect on a much deeper level. It’s not just about sexual chemistry, although that too can be very intimate. Pure intimate feelings come from a much deeper place. A touch of the hand while staring into the eyes of someone who sees right inside your soul is intimate. A feeling of belonging together formed from a bond of experiencing the other.

There are two types of intimacy; physical and emotional. Love is intertwined in both. There are also two types of love within intimacy; compassionate and passionate. Compassionate love involves diminished feeling of attachment to the other. It is authentic, committed with profound feelings of caring for the other. Passionate love is identified by infatuation, intense feelings of sexual longing, throes of ecstasy and feelings of exhilaration that fill the room when you are together. To have a combination of both physical and emotional intimacy with passionate love is what most of us are ultimately seeking.

It’s a look across a room filled with people to that one person who turns you inside out and back again. A gaze that is only meant for you. A moment suspended in time. They know exactly what you’re thinking. It’s the magic of an intimate connection.

When we open our heart and expose ourselves making it known we are vulnerable to the other we experience the most profound intimate moments. It can’t be controlled, even if you try. You can walk away physically but your mind won’t allow you to leave the room they’re in. It can be a scary step if you’re not ready to open yourself to its entirety. A risk that many will not allow their heart to explore.

When you fall intimately for another human being they live inside your mind. They change the physiology of your body. They stir your soul. You become enveloped by their energy. They surround you no matter how far their physical form is from yours. They stand next to you inhaling your presence. It’s a powerful sensation that can overwhelm the ordinary.

Intimacy is considered the product of a successful seduction…so sexy!

Tracy~

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On The Road to Reality…

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IMG_0066From where I have come is a question I ask myself often. Why am I here? What is my purpose, if not to live a life wrapped in true romantic love. It has taken me years to come to the realization that the path in which I have followed, is perhaps not going to lead me to where I dream of being…

Reality is like the devil in my world. Born Aquarius, I naturally look to the future. I live in a different world. I am a daydreamer, a night-dreamer and as far back as I can remember, I willingly escaped to the life my imagination created carefully in my head. I danced until dawn. I laughed until I cried. I kissed like it was goodbye. I loved with my heart and soul. I believed in true love and fairy tale romance. I lived it, inhaled it with every breath I took. My quest was simple…to capture ‘that’ feeling one gives you when you connect deeply through the windows of your soul. That look that makes you smile from a place so intimate your cheeks blush and skin heats from within.

I live in the clouds and spin my dream into interludes trying to capture a moment in time that makes my heart beat faster. The language of love. My imagination fulfills my romantic desires but I yearn for more than just those whimsical thoughts that floated by, way up high.

I have packed my bag lightly with a few belongings, mostly memories gone by, a leather bound notebook, a pencil to scribble my thoughts, a piece of jewelry I cherish and an old photograph that will remind me who I am. As I look around my space comes alive. My past flashes before my eyes like old movies playing on the projector in my mind.

I put my hand on the door in front of me feeling the energy that radiates behind it. This particular door will open when it’s ready. Until then I will stand close and feel its warmth pass through me. Like a child waiting to open a gift, the anticipation is overwhelming. For now, I will float among familiar ones that take me back to sift through the meanings that they brought forth to help create who I have become. Each one was placed in my path for a reason, a life lesson. You never know where a door will lead if you fear the unknown.

I sit on my cloud and contemplate what was and what will be. Each life experience or door I was courageous enough to venture through took part in making me who I am today as I pack my bag ready to come down from where I have called home since I was a child. It’s time.

I bow my head as I approach a new beginning with tears in my eyes of memories I hope never get lost in the shuffle of life. I savor each moment as I slowly reach forward and place my hand on the ornate worn knob. The moments I want to bring with me are safely placed at my side if I feel homesick, a familiar feeling as a child. There will always be a silver thread holding me to what I am not meant to let go.

The energy from behind the door waiting for me glows with a light so warm it almost feels like home. It distracts me from this moment like a future waiting to unfold.

So you see, I do know from where I’ve come. I need not know why I am here. My purpose is to be. True love is all around me. I will arrive when it is time. It is only now where I want to be in mind, body and spirit. I need not a daydream or fantasy in my life to feel full, reality can be as exciting as the world inside my mind.

Svaha ~

Tracy signiture

 

 

 

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Temptation…

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IMG_0096_3_2He pulled me in without a promise. He pushed me back in fear. His body moved like a panther stalking. He circled slowly not taking his eyes off me. Intensely engaged his stare glazed over as he tasted my body with his eyes. His insatiable desire to have me overpowered his ability to fight the temptation that stood behind closed doors at last. He was about to devour the prey he’d been hunting for far too long. He was moments away from taking what he believed belonged to him.

As he savoured the visual moment his thoughts balanced on the edge, about to spin out of control. T-e-m-p-t-a-t-i-o-n had entered the room and would not leave without a fight. His mouth watered at the thought of what my skin would taste like. He swallowed the saliva that pooled behind his lips, knowing he could not turn back once his mouth touched mine. His eyes gently closed as he inhaled my scent slowly and deeply.

I felt his eyes heating up the curve of my lower back as he paused before taking another step. I bit my lip gently as I turned my head catching him off guard with a look that penetrated his wall, exposing his soul. I whispered…check~mate. We were like magnets attracting and repelling each others every move. He caught my glance and held it tight. I felt the shift in his breathing ever so slightly as he narrowed the distance between us. I could feel the base of his heart beating like a wave of energy going right through me. His energy was like music to my soul. We were entangled in a dance neither of us were familiar with.

I closed my eyes to sharpen my intuition and escape into the abyss with him. His energy moved me as he came even closer. He vibrated my skin and scrambled my thoughts. Every hair on my body stood erect waiting, wondering if he was brave enough to dance as one. His breath on the back of my neck sent shivers down my spine. I could barely contain myself. Temptation was standing closer than it had ever been before. Whispering in my ear to succumb to its pleasure. We were both no longer able to walk away. Our minds were reading the thoughts of the other, our bodies ached for one another and our spirits were a breath away from coming completely undone.

He teased and tantalized my energy with the look in his eyes as he opened his mouth, moistened his lips and inhaled my being in one breath. There would never be a moment as pure as this between us again.

“The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it” ~ Oscar Wilde 

Tracy signiture

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Polo Anyone?

Polo Anyone? Pass the Nacho’s please ! For the Ladies and Gentlemen of Tara Cronica!

I don’t know about you but I feel Inspired to watch Polo, those horses were amazing!  No but seriously, didn’t Nacho Figueras make you want to tune into Black Watch Polo.  It is a sport that has it all, competition, speed, skill, royalty (Prince Henry of Wales, known as Prince Harry), crashing, horses and handsome men!!  Nacho Figueras & Prince Harry

It’s a sport that is all about Tradition, Soul and Beauty!  I’m just sayin…

Tracy signiture

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The Truth About Power!

TracyI was reading ‘O magazine’ the other night and found a great article on ‘Power People’ that I found interesting and wanted to share with you.

Selected Power People were asked to finish sentences and here are a few examples.  Try to finish them for yourselves afterwards or even before you read what these Power Women have said.  There was a lot more to this article if you want to pick up O magazine to read it for yourself.

Elizabeth Lesser: Co Founder of the Omega Institute

I feel true power when…“I trust my soul’s voice. I feel peaceful yet strong, gentle yet courageous.
Too often people confuse power and …”Ego.
I feel least powerful when…”I am stingy, fearful, or unloving.”
When I need a power boost…“I place my hand on my heart, take a deep breath, and feel my connection with everyone.

Gloria Steinem: Writer and feminist activist

I feel true power when…“I hear someone say that anything I did or said or wrote helped to change her or his life for the better.
Too often people confuse power and …”Money for it’s own sake.”
I feel least powerful when…”I’m misunderstood or am watching people be invisible or humiliated.”
When I need a power boost…”I sit in a circle with (mostly) women who also are trying to create a world in which everyone matters.”

Stacy Schiff: Pulitzer Prize-winning author

I feel true power when…  “I unravel a problem to my satisfaction, which by definition means the problem was someone else’s in the first place.”
Too often people confuse power and…“Money, title, ambition, and a fancy address.”
I feel least powerful when…  “I’m in the presence of a new piece of technology- and it’s operating manual.”
When I need a power boost… “I double the caffeine, turn up the music, and head out for a run.”

Here are my answers:

Tracy Westerholm: Co Creator of Tara Cronica

I feel true power when…“My mind, body and soul feel balanced and I am living in the moment.”
Too often people confuse power and…“Wealth and Occupation.”
I feel least powerful when…“I have neglected my exercise routine and not connected with my circle of close friends who always make me feel grounded.”
When I need a power boost…”I call a girlfriend and if there is no answer I put on my ipod and go for a long run to clear my mind and energise my soul, it’s all about balance.”

Ask yourself these questions and see what you come up with.

Oprah ended the article with this and I couldn’t agree more… The secret is alignment: when you know for sure that you’re on course and doing exactly what you’re suppose to be doing, fulfilling your soul’s intention, your heart’s desire, or whatever you choose to call it. (they’re all the same thing) When your life is on course with its purpose, you are your most powerful. And you may stumble, but you will not fall.

Tracy

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Be Something You Love And Understand

Bonnie Johnson's PostAbout four years ago I heard the song “Simple Man” by Shinedown and it really spoke to me.  I know that Lynard Skynard was first to do this song but I really liked the way that Shinedown sang it…and with so much soul.  I love the words and I told my son, James, who was a teenager at the time that I wanted him to listen carefully to the lyrics because those words were exactly what I wished for him.  It really is quite simple.  Be something you love and understand.  The rest will fall into place then.

Fast forward three years, James is home from school visiting and playing his guitar.  He has been practicing a special song that he wants me to hear.  I almost cried when he started singing “Simple Man” with as much soul as Shinedown.  Now, another year later he is home for a short visit again (he leaves for Tampa tomorrow : (  …after only one week…sigh) and just finished playing his repertoire of old and new favourites.  He finished his session with the one he knows means a great deal to me…Simple Man.  I wanted to share it with you but he refused to let me video him so I’ll have to sneak the camera on him another day I can only offer you this “simple” video of Shinedown singing with the words scrolling.  I think it’s fitting.  I have also added a picture of James playing just a few days ago.  If you squint your eyes you may be able to imagine him performing it.  Enjoy!

james guitar

Bonnie

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Music: The Sound Of Your Soul

Bonnie Johnson's PostI’d like to continue our “music” theme a little more.  Music is, and always has been, such a big part of my life.  After a statement like that you would think that I’d list all of the musical instruments I can play.  Speak to you about the hours of dedicated practice I put in to the piano, flute, violin, guitar, name an instrument…but, in fact, I don’t play any.  And I’ve never been able to sing well enough that others would want to pay to listen either.  (Or listen…period)

Although I don’t have a particular talent to make beautiful music, I have still been drawn to it and have loved it my whole life.  I love all kinds and genres of music.

I have a theory about that.

I believe that music is the sound of your Soul.  It is created by vibration.  Vibration is energy.  Energy is Source.  People who create beautiful music speak of being “inspired”.  I like to think of the word “inspired” as also meaning “in spirit”.

I remember listening to the sound track from “The Last of the Mohicans” and being moved to tears.  Not by any words, because there weren’t any, but just from the ebb and flow of the music itself.

I love it when the rhythm and beat of a song kicks your energy to the next level.  I’m not a jogger but on the rare occasions I have gone for a run, I swear the only thing that kept me going was by having some high energy songs pumping through my I-pod.

My son, James, plays the guitar and writes his own music and lyrics now.  He recently told me that when the stress of university starts to get to him he takes out his guitar and gets lost in his music.  It soothes his soul.  He re-aligns.

I’m reminded of the sound of OM or AUM which is the most often chanted sound in mantras.  It is believed that the whole universe, in its fundamental form, is made up of vibrating, pulsating energy.  OM is considered as the humming sound of this cosmic energy.  How cool is that!

Our Tara’s mantra is “Om Tare Tuttare Ture Svaha” and is featured on our Goddess Tara Bio page.

Something to think about!

Bonnie

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Dreams really do come true

Bonnie's PostI don’t remember how old I was the first time I heard the song “Over the rainbow” but  I was very young, maybe 4 or or 5 years old.   Like most people I heard it for the first time when I watched The Wizard of Oz.  According to Wikipedia it was written for the movie.  The music was written by Harold Arlen and lyrics by E.Y. Harburg and sung by Judy Garland.  I was instantly moved by the music and even more by the words.  Still to this day when I hear it sung I can get teary.  It moves me that much.   I recently came across the video below of Jason Castro on American Idol and I have been watching it over and over and over.  Why does this get to me so much I wonder.

I think it is my soul trying to remind me, once again, that dreams really do come true.  Troubles really can melt like lemon drops…and dreams that you dare to…why oh why can’t I?  You can! my higher self whispers to me during this song.  Dream big because dreams really do come true.

I hope you enjoy this as much as I do and while it plays listen for your soul whispering to you too.
Bonnie

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‘Friends with Benefits’

Tracy

When I first started writing this post I had a humorous view but when I weighed my options of making a point that I feel is very important and finding humour in almost anything, my humorous view almost flew out the window and the real me came forward.  I think I can do both, find humour and make a point.   Let’s see.  We have all heard the term ‘friends with benefits’.  It’s basically having hopefully great sex with no strings attached.  In my day, I remember that being called a one night stand or a booty call.  There was a reason for feeling bad after having one but I can’t remember why now…the age thing and memory starts to fade when you hit 40!  But with teens now it doesn’t  just happen one night or time, it lasts as long as they want it to.  But who ends it, why and when?  That’s where the emotions come in and I think where things go awry.

Am I right?  Correct me if I am wrong girls or guys out there.  My girlfriends son told her it is quite normal for teens to have ‘friends with benefits’ and they don’t get looked down upon.  Sign me up I guess if both parties are consenting and are having safe sex it’s their decision to make.  Would I want a friend with benefits?  Would you?  We all have the opportunity, it’s whether we take it or not.  I am struggling with this right now and don’t know if it’s my conditioning or a generation gap.  Part of me say’s well “Whyy nott” but the other part of me says “it’s not good for the soul”.  To not know where you stand with someone is hard enough when there is no sex involved.  Emotions and chemistry is what give sex such passion.  The moral side of me says ‘Live by example’ and the fun side not so moral side says ‘live with no regrets’. Stay with me here I am working through this as I write.

What I think bothers me about this the most is that it is happening younger and younger and some teens are not mature enough to make this decision on their own. They are afraid of being judged by their own peer groups.  It’s much like bullying in the way that when boys are rough with one another, it is possible that one of them doesn’t really want to participate but is forced to out of pressure of not wanting to appear weak.

Friends with Benefits sounds to me like a decision that is made without the thought process that should take place when deciding to give a sacred part of yourself to someone who doesn’t really care if it’s you or not.  I am a confident strong woman but I didn’t get this way from making poor moral decisions in my life.  (Bonnie stay out of it ! ha)  I think it is up to us as parents to do everything we can to make sure our sons understand the self-esteem issues young woman get when their self worth is questioned.  It’s also our responsibility to make sure our daughters have confidence and respect for themselves, as well as from the opposite sex.  I am not sure I could have a friend with benefits unless of course  Gabriel Aubry walked through my bedroom door, then I would be naked in an embarrassing nanosecond.  Humour is important in life and helps lighten certain topics of conversations, but morals and values are the basis of your character.   Teach your kids first as a parent.  Live your life as a soul enriching your existence.  Live by example.  Try to make good decisions and learn by questionable ones.  And always remember it’s about assessing blame. (joking)  So I think I like my friends just the way they are!

Tracy

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Beyond Marriage…part one

Before anything else I really want to say “Happy Birthday” to ‘a really good friend of mine’.   He is spontaneous, charismatic and a seeker of knowledge.  He has all the qualities of a true warrior; discipline, strength of mind and body, ability, courage and loyalty, to name a few.   He is limitless and forever pushing the boundaries of what life has to offer.  He is able to read people intuitively.  He is not a man who will fall prey to women who think they can get what they want with a simple batting of their eyelashes or sexual manipulation. He is far too intelligent for that.  A free spirit with wings that keep developing so he can soar above humanity and change the world by living as an example.  He has true greatness inside that he lets out in small doses for those open to it.  Scott is the most incredible man I know.  He is an evolved human being who has always been my Best Friend through pretty much everything.  Our Friendship is unbreakable!!  Happy Birthday Scott !  You’re  amazing, to say the least! xoIt's my Birthday !!

Now here is an excerpt from a novel I am working on called…

Beyond Marriage...part one  by Tracy Westerholm

The feeling of being out of control and not knowing.  The feeling you get when you first meet someone is so powerful.  When you first catch that sparkle in their eye.  They reach inside your soul and touch you with theirs.  Your entire body changes and you feel every cell come alive.  It’s as if they have complete control over you.  You get jittery and feel cold.

Sometimes we just get a glimpse into the window of their soul and walk away afraid of looking back.  Afraid of what?  You can’t deny these incredible feelings.  It’s an energy that is felt by both.  Your heart flutters, your knees go weak.  You’re nervous beyond belief.  Just being near that persons chemistry drives you to a place we all want to go.  Passionate love!  It’s meant to be out of control!  You can’t control it, that is what is so incredible about it.  Passion

To lose control and let it happen is so difficult for us.  If we did,  I think more of us would be happier, passionate souls in this very planned life we all live.  We need to break free of what is expected of us and get rid of the obligations we put on ourselves and have others put upon us.  We need to do what makes us more in tune  with our natural instincts.

We all want it more than anything else but are afraid of letting go of traditions that have been passed down from generations before us.  We are not living the life we are meant to unless we have the courage to adjust and move forward with what comes from deep inside each one of us.  We need to ask ourselves “What do I want?”  ” Am I being true to myself?”  These are questions I have had at some point in my life.  I’m sure you have too.

If we are really true to ourselves and honest about what we want and need, life would be more fulfilling  and much simpler.  We need to slow down and have eye contact with other souls who are open to that unique connection.  Our lives are so busy and full that we don’t see anymore.  We can’t connect with others if the connection has been lost in the process.  To experience this for yourself try to be open to others and really look into their eyes.  The powerful connections you will feel will bring you into the moment and make you realize there is more out there if you simply open your eyes to it.

to be continued…

Tracy

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The Power of a smile

big smileI recently read a lovely comment about how offering a smile to someone was like blowing them a kiss from your soul.

I wish I could remember the exact quote but it certainly made me smile when I read it.

Later that day while I was out running some errands, I watched a few people smiling at each other and the reactions they received. Whoever was offered a smile always smiled back and their spirit seemed lifted. It made me think about how the energy of one persons smile seems to transfer to the person being smiled at. It was obvious that in those moments of ‘smile sharing’ everyone felt uplifted and happy. What a wonderful gift!

I decided to play with this a little. I went to my gym. I had noticed in the past that most of the women go about their workouts without looking at each other eye to eye. Oh, we all check each other out and assess the latest workout wear etc., but not many look each other in the eye and offer a smile. I made a deliberate choice to look directly at everyone who crossed my path that day and smile at them. The response was great! Everyone smiled back and some offered “hello’s” and “how are you today’s”. Then it struck me! There may have been lots of smiling going on before but I wasn’t participating. Now that I’m smiling at everyone I meet I’m receiving that great energy too.

It is so simple and yet so powerful.

Here is a wonderful piece I found that really sums it up beautifully.

“A SMILE costs nothing, but gives much. It enriches those who receive, without making poorer those who give. It takes but a moment, but the memory of it sometimes lasts forever. None is so rich or mighty that he can get along without it, and none is so poor but that he can not be made rich by it. A smile creates happiness in the home, fosters good will in business, and is the countersign of friendship. It brings rest to the weary, cheer to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad, and is nature’s best antidote for trouble. Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed, or stolen, for it is something that is of no value to anyone until it is given away. Some people are too tired to give you a smile. Give them one of yours, as none needs a smile so much as he who has no more to give.”

— believed to be based on the writings of Rabbi Samson Raphael Hirsch

smile– Bonnie : )

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