Facial Hair is Sexy…

There is no better place to find yourself than the world our distracted minds naturally send us. Deep inside the imagination of a sexy mind lies the vivid dreams and fantasies of what a single thought can do. This time the thought that scaled the walls of my subconscious was that of pheromone filled facial hair.

The male energy who adorns a ribbon across his lip is making a statement we have all become aware of, Movember is fast approaching. He is willing to take a stand, go the distance, be uncomfortable and show the world he wants to be here. He is strong and masculine. Male energy with a purpose greater than himself.

There are those who wear a little more than a ribbon on their lip all year long. It’s an expression of who they are or where they’ve been. Facial hair is soft, rugged, manly. It has natural pheromones that pull us in. It can be abrasive if rubbed the wrong way but soft and gentle if stroked in the right direction. It shouts testosterone. It’s a choice, unique to the one who wears it, a right of passage even.

And it goes like this…

My eyes were closed, lost in my subconscious thought. I had goose bumps rising like waves on the surface of my skin from head to toe in anticipation of what was to come. The world went silent around me as I felt his very first touch. His lips did not arrive first to my skin. The soft warm tickle from his beard came first. He paused, searching it seemed for the perfect place to kiss. His facial hair brushed my skin gently as he continued exploring the map of my body. Every hair follicle across the surface of my canvas yearned for his touch. His breathe warmed the surface of my skin as he continued until he found his favourite spot.

Facial hair is sexy…

~ Tracy

 

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I Miss…

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The strength of a man standing at my side.
The unexpected kiss on my temple. I miss hands on my cheeks, when his lips touch mine. His gentle strength that guides me through the crowd.

I miss the feeling of being safe, tucked under his arm. I miss pausing to gaze at his hand holding the door. I miss the scent that stays in my sheets when he’s gone. I miss sleeping in the shirt he left behind.

I miss being pulled in tight when it wasn’t time. I miss hearing his heart beat in the still of the night. I miss being awakened by a touch so light. I miss the look that he gives me from across the room.

I miss when he moves my hair to the side, so his lips can leave a kiss goodbye. I miss the sound that he makes when I touch his side. I miss the warmth of his breath on a cold winter day, warming my neck, wanting to stay.

I miss feeling his skin come alive in the room. The energy we create only inches away. I miss feeling him lose complete control, as our bodies start to feel a flow. I miss dancing in a quiet room, candles, music, slight perfume.

I miss having a man care for my soul, holding my heart not wanting to go.

I miss…

~Tracy

 

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Intimacy…

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Intimacy…the ultimate sexy! Being drawn to someone without control is a feeling that many of us only experience once in a lifetime. It’s a magical force between two who connect on a much deeper level. It’s not just about sexual chemistry, although that too can be very intimate. Pure intimate feelings come from a much deeper place. A touch of the hand while staring into the eyes of someone who sees right inside your soul is intimate. A feeling of belonging together formed from a bond of experiencing the other.

There are two types of intimacy; physical and emotional. Love is intertwined in both. There are also two types of love within intimacy; compassionate and passionate. Compassionate love involves diminished feeling of attachment to the other. It is authentic, committed with profound feelings of caring for the other. Passionate love is identified by infatuation, intense feelings of sexual longing, throes of ecstasy and feelings of exhilaration that fill the room when you are together. To have a combination of both physical and emotional intimacy with passionate love is what most of us are ultimately seeking.

It’s a look across a room filled with people to that one person who turns you inside out and back again. A gaze that is only meant for you. A moment suspended in time. They know exactly what you’re thinking. It’s the magic of an intimate connection.

When we open our heart and expose ourselves making it known we are vulnerable to the other we experience the most profound intimate moments. It can’t be controlled, even if you try. You can walk away physically but your mind won’t allow you to leave the room they’re in. It can be a scary step if you’re not ready to open yourself to its entirety. A risk that many will not allow their heart to explore.

When you fall intimately for another human being they live inside your mind. They change the physiology of your body. They stir your soul. You become enveloped by their energy. They surround you no matter how far their physical form is from yours. They stand next to you inhaling your presence. It’s a powerful sensation that can overwhelm the ordinary.

Intimacy is considered the product of a successful seduction…so sexy!

Tracy~

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Come Back Home ~

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10489785_10152160567902032_2869315922428771213_nI believe we all require time on our own when a relationship comes to an end, regardless of how long our chosen partner was a part of our life. Just like we need time on our own to grieve the loss of a loved one. We need to ‘come back home’ so to speak. I always took time to come back home in my younger years. Once, I literally came back home and slept on my parents living room floor to rebalance my life that was spiralling out of control because of what I thought was love. My intention was to be there for a couple of months, which turned into a year. We laugh about it now and say I came home for retraining. Without the love, support and guidance of my parents, I would not have come through that time in my life with the confidence they gave me by being there. I didn’t need to always have a man by my side. I wanted one, but the right one and that was the lesson I learned from them. That lesson has stayed with me today.

It took two years to even entertain the idea of adding a man back into my world when my marriage ended. Even though I was placed softly back into the world of dating, I fumbled and faltered more often than not. At times I felt like I was in a dream running in slow motion, trying to gain my footing but couldn’t no matter how hard I tried. I wasn’t ready. I didn’t know what I wanted or who I had become so how could I possibly put out what I needed or wanted from another human being.

Life get much more complicated when you find yourself solo in the later parts of life. Responsibility of family and work makes it more difficult to make an attempt to walk with someone down a path, that now feels foreign and unfamiliar.

We all question whether we are worthy of love at some point in our lives. I know I have many times. If you take time to rebalance and sift through your inner thoughts, self doubts and fears, your dreams, desires and feelings will come alive again. We don’t all take time for ourselves which makes each union slightly off balance until we clear our mind, body and soul of what was left behind. If we don’t eliminate the fear of not being enough from our core, we can’t be enough for anyone, including ourselves.

Life is meant to be shared, we all matter in the world in which we live. We are all connected and need to treat one another with the love and respect we all deserve! Honesty and integrity are character traits we choose, just as we choose to smile each day and accept those who cross our path with open arms and a warm heart.

Time is always on our side, if you value the work you need to do within in. There is no rush when it comes to love. What matters most is that we learn to love ourselves before we try to love another.

We live, we learn, we love, we matter…every single one of us!

~Tracy

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Ryland Whittington ~

The-Whittingtons-300x209 10407872_10152072469157032_6170729355099373110_nParenting is one of the most rewarding yet challenging trips you can take. It teaches us patience, understanding and allows our heart to grow bigger than we ever imagined. Love never runs out!

This story made me smile from the centre of my being! I LOVE this family! If we had more accepting human beings in the world we would all learn to reach for the stars more often! Ryland Whittington’s story is the epitome of truly loving unconditionally and most importantly listening to the dreams and wishes of your child. We need to allow them to follow their instincts that are deep inside of who they truly are.

Sometimes, life requires us to question our pre-existing notions and norms of what we were taught. It requires us to truly think about what’s important to us and what really matters. We hope you find this story as inspirational and touching as we did.”

~Tracy

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Feelings ~ Thoughts ~ Words

59f8ee19a6a8353ccc9fb29af06a6b5c“Thoughts become things…choose the good ones” ~Notes from the Universe

10407872_10152072469157032_6170729355099373110_nThis is a quote I am aware of every single day. There are few moments in time that it does not stay at the forefront of my over active mind. It settles the way I process my day to day life. I need this thought like the desert needs the rain.

No one can be expected to always choose the good ones, but we do our best. There is nothing wrong with wallowing in thoughts of uncertainty or insecurity if you are aware you are there, just don’t hang around too long. We sometimes don’t appreciate the good without the bad, the up without the down, love without being alonelife without loss.

Balance makes us appreciate what we have and have not. Through each life experience we learn more about who we are and how we can use what we learn to move forward on our path, whatever path that may be, to where ever it may lead.

Transition takes time. I continue to go through a transitional state in mind, body and spirit. I am starting to understand how to deal with the unknown more and take with me the thoughts and people that keep me grounded.

Music sends me away from time to time and reminds me that I am not the only one. I believe lyrics are written and shared not to expose the intimate thoughts of another but to allow those who listen the feeling of being connected to something so grand and universal it speak with a common chord. “Music is what feelings sound like” another favourite quote of mine!

I crave stories of love that allow me to escape into a world I hope and dream to be mine one day. Some days that dream feels like a mirage. We all dip into the thoughts we may not be deserving but we know in our heart that is not true. Everyone deserves to be loved by another.

~A flower without water…wilting.

~Petals fall to the ground.

~Words unspoken.

~Thoughts let go.

~A drop of water…continue to grow.

~tracy

No matter what emotion washes over you, embrace it, immerse every ounce of your being into how it makes you feel. If it’s sadness…feel it, excitment…let it explode from the centre of where it came! If your heart ache then allow the ache to penetrate your soul! Once you walk within the emotion that holds you, it lessens its grip, you become more acquainted and you let go. YOU let go.

“That’s the thing about pain, it demands to be felt” John Green 

Feel it and let go…

Some feelings fade, others grow with time. Some we keep tucked away in the deepest part of our hearts, others we set free with the slightest breeze. We gather strength after we allow them to take us to unknown places. The journey back again happens with time.

“Thoughts become things…choose the good ones”

Tracy 

 

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Thirteen!

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Happy 13th Birthday Jordan Rylie June 4th 2001!

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don’t ask…I’m sure there was a reason!

I am not quite sure how you went from this below….to that above? It blows my mind just thinking about it! Thirteen years ago today you changed my life. My family was complete with a perfect boy and now a beautiful baby girl. The Million Dollar Family! I kept the ‘girl’ part a secret, but finally I got to share YOU with the world! My GIRL!

I am so very proud of who you are! You have such a beautiful soul. You have touched the lives of so many in such a short amount of time! Your character is unique, unusual even, for your age. I don’t think this is your first BBQ. You seamlessly navigate yourself through the winding roads of life without a worry in the world. You are smart and witty and have a sense of self that is unafraid to explore what this magical life has to offer! You simply get it! If you would just get the clean your room part that would be a bonus! (I’m not holding my breath!) You have such purpose and share your natural instinct with those around you. You have compassion that bubbles over and empathy that comes from deep within. Your moral fibre and family values are still intact, lets keep it that way! ;)

ImageI know being a teenager is not going to be easy, it never is, but I know that you will master this challenge with a happy heart and colourful courageous spirit! You go gurl! Keep me posted, I am just down the hall in the tidy room! I am right here 24/7 if you need some awesome parenting 101 advice, I’m going pro next year! I can guide you part way but you’re going to have to help me here, there is no ‘Dummies on Teenagers’ book that I am aware of, so just cut me some slack now and then. Remember, I am also hormonal so it’s a double whammy for us chicksters! Let’s get this party started!

Always keep in mind Music helps soothe the soul, (can extent your run by at least 2K if you crank it) and a good piece of chocolate is so under rated! I have a hidden stash if your moody blues need a boost.

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I feel blessed that you chose me to be your Mom. I will forever be grateful that you came into my life. I am right here watching you blossom into a gorgeous young lady…I use the term lady loosely knowing who you are! You are definitely not shy! Your sense of humour catches me off guard every single day! That alone makes any split second hormonal outburst worth it in my eyes. If you could just stagger yours between mine that would be helpful.

Your quirky personality makes me gut laugh every single day! You are your own person indeed! Love that about you! A true leader!

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Jordan, Happy Birthday! I love you with all of my heart and wish for you the world and everything in it! Now go makes some more waves!

Mom ((((smile)))) xoxoxoxoxo

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Peace Out!

 

 

 

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Love Liberates ~ Dr Maya Angelou

Dr Maya Angelou

IMG_6835Dr May Angelou died at the age of 86 and she left with us so many beautiful thoughts, poems, quotes and words of extraordinary wisdom! Here is one that resonated with me very deeply.

Thank you for sharing this with me Bonnie! ((((smile))))

“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” ~ Dr Maya Angelou

Tracy signiture

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Back to Basics ~

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IMG_6835I have had a great deal of inner dialog lately that seems to surface at unexpected times during my day. It feels like my subconscious is sending out warning signals, interrupting my thought process, trying to remind me to stay connected. I have been in deep thought about what I want and how I am going to achieve it, physically, spiritually, mentally, financially and in love. Times up, todays the day!

The physical part is easy…just do it. Put your shoes on and go! Lately I have lost my connection with that feeling of being exhilarated by movement. I crave it! I am starting to understand why.

“Hi my name is Tracy Westerholm and I am addicted to massive amounts of social media!” There I said it. Social Media has been the instigator to my disconnect. Too much time with my face in my phone engulfed in every iPhone app related to connecting with others, which has made me feel disconnected with myself and oddly enough…others!

WARNING RUN ON SENTENCE AHEAD…

Lets be honest all the social media that is out there is actually NOT allowing us to connect with one another up close and personal! I don’t have time after I log in to Facebook and check my messages, upload a pic or two, say hi to a few friends, BBM the handsome dude back East, answer my Text Messages, scroll Instagram, WhatsApp my non iPhone friends, check out who checked me out on OkCupid, answer my regular Email (not one but 4 accounts) Facetime my daughter in the other room, Skype, Snapchat, Pinterest, download a new song from iTunes, listen to it, YouTube the latest cool video, MapMyRun but now I am so tired…I don’t run! Good God no wonder I don’t have time to meet you for coffee! I need a nap just reading that!

I am deactivating ( <~a true addict) distancing myself from Facebook (insert gasp here) and although I know I will go back at some point, I need this brake break. (<~ thanks Bon…see I need your balance…come back!) I need to fall back in love with me, so I have taken a few steps to unplug all the distractions that are preventing me from becoming a better me. I need to find my focus.

Reconnecting with my spirituality has also been on my mind, but has been clouded by the chaos that I have allowed to surround me. I need to reconnect with what is important to me. I need to listen to my heart without all the distractions of my head.

Financially I am starting to feel in control. It is about balancing needs and wants. Having the desire and drive to achieve short and long term goals you set is critical in seeing them to fruition. If you don’t set these goals you lose sight of where you are heading. Having spent the last year working at Envision Financial I have become very much aware of what is important in finding a balance in my financial life. I have also experienced first hand how having a plan in place helps you reach your goals, no matter what they are. I love my job and the women I work with, they are so willing to share their knowledge and support with one another.

Mentally I strive to be in a place that makes sense. I think too much. Although I am ready to take on whatever comes my way it can be daunting at times. I remind myself ~ It’s how we react to tough situations that makes us truly who we are, building our character along the way. I think all of us need to take a mental vacation from everything to see clearly what we need to change. I know I do, I am.

Love! I can’t write anything without there being an underlying voice of love, it’s who I am. It truly is all we really need. Loving unconditionally without boundaries or restrictions is the purest form of love. I have struggled over the years to understand what I want and need in regard to love. I think I may be searching for a moving ship. Some days I sink, other days I float.

One thing I know for sure is that I need my girlfriends! Female energy is nurturing. When I  walk next to one of my girlfriends, whether my heart is heavy or light, whether I have tears of sadness or joy they always seem to balance my energy with theirs making us feel empowered and able to take on the world once again!

Have a wonderful long weekend everyone! Be safe and connect with someone up close and personal, it matter!

Svaha ~

Tracy signiture

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Transition…

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IMG_6835I know when it happened for me, looking back in this moment, it was long awaited. The transition of understanding a higher level of what real love can be and the meaning or feelings behind it. Loving another unconditionally without any need for commitment. A deep friendship that you know will stand the test of time.

Love takes it’s toll on all of us at some point in our lives. We accept the consequences as soon as we take a step forward with a potential love interest. It can be daunting if you’re not ready or have had your heart bruised more than once. Given the chance I would take that step over and over knowing what may come my way. Hearts always mend if we give ourselves enough time.

I have finally understood that love does not need romance to fuel it’s flame. Love is pure and simple. Love comes to us when we least expect it. To love another human being is to accept them for who they are not forcing them to change to meet our needs. When we open our hearts exposing our intimate thoughts, bare our souls and accept, love deepens beyond our wildest dreams.

Tracy signiture

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Landmarks in Life ~

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IMG_6835We are all part of Landmark events; the birth of a child, a wedding, the passing of a loved one, a success in life. Each waypoint becomes a memorable time in life waiting to be revisited when we feel the need. When we allow these moments in time to resurface, feelings emerge and we reflect on how each of them changed who we are. We connect our dots. They eventually define who we are as a whole. Each one of these Landmark events is part of what develops our core.

I recently added a dot to my journey in life. I feel as though I have a blank sheet of music that awaits the melody I will create. The people I meet along the way are the notes, those who are a constant in my life are that familiar chorus, the memories we make together will become the lyrics to my song. Each chord that is played will evoke a feeling that will resonate with me for years to come. Some verses in my song will haunt me, others will overflow with passion, some will bring a ((((smile)))), others may well a tear to the surface that will courageously take its own path and gently slip away.

As we walk along our path creating our music in life we will be joined by a select few who will walk with us for our entire journey. Others will joins us to teach us a lesson or two and then fade away off into the distance. Some will walk with us long enough to challenge who we are and may even change our path. There will be few who will feel like home that will unconditionally love who we are and accept all the musical genres we have created. They will fight for us. They will stand strong at our side no matter where we choose to go.

We all meet those who make their mark in our lives. We may not play with them as often as we would like, but they are instrumental in helping us write our song. We learn in time that when we need them to hum that familiar chorus they will, when the time is right. They are part of who we are, our internal compass, that finds us and brings us back home when we are lost amid the chaos in life.

T ~

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2014 The Year of Being Content!

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IMG_6568Relaaaaaax…what could go wrong? We spend so much time thinking and not doing, holding back, not taking chances. We fear the unknown, we hide our eyes, we no longer seek the truth, we wait and worry.

Music takes me to that far away place my soul calls home. As I savour a glass of red and write that ember that hides deep within my existence starts to grow. I must admit life feels rather good at the moment. I am open. I am free. I seek the truth and drift into the clouds.

It’s healthy to escape the chaos…necessary even. Music is the instrument that helps me get there. I can feel myself letting go of all the trivial things that build up throughout the day as I sit surrounded by a melody. I have a warm glow radiating from a place that has felt dormant lately, a place I can usually escape to in a moment of silence. Silence, a place becoming extinct within us. A place we don’t visit often enough. Finding that silence is like going home.

The evening starts to unravel as my thoughts dance with my imagination. The sound escorts my worries away. In this moment I let go. I am able to quiet the noise and hear the beauty in my solitude. Free of everything that keeps me grounded, It’s time to sit amidst the clouds and contemplate my existence once again.

I think we all need to sit and remember that our time here is limited, before we know it we will be moving on. Times up, take chances, do what you love, make a difference, change a life, share, give, love. Just be, no judgment, no worry, no restrictions, no boundaries, float through the day with whomever crosses your path.

Be open to the sound of silence.

I have relaxed a great deal over the years but lately I feel different. I feel content to share the room, or not. I don’t feel as though I should be doing anything other than what I am, right now in this moment. I have surrendered to the Universe with not a worry in the world.

This magical ride we call life is ours to create. We choose who we share it with. We choose where we explore. We choose.

Entice all your senses as your journey begins in a New Year where endless possibilities are waiting to be uncovered.

Listen, See, Feel, Touch, Taste, Trust and most of all Love with your entire Heart ~

Happy New Year!

Tracy signiture

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Merry Christmas!

0E915821-6BB9-4E73-BF4A-7CF9B34DFD28Merry Christmas Everyone! This is classic when it comes to Christmas tunes, it makes me smile each year. Musicians have been using their voices to change the world for years. I love when talented people join forces to make a difference in the world. This is a great example of what can be done when we work together.

So when you are spending time with your family this holiday season remember to give to those who are not as fortunate.

I wish you all a very Merry Christmas!

Tracy signiture

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Forever Changing…

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IMG_0096_3_2When you let go of expectation in life, things change. Expectation breeds disappointment. Disappointment stops us from taking chances. Most of us have taken a chance with our hearts but not without fear that the crack we have already tried to mend over time will continue to grow. What must it feel to have a heart that has not felt the power of love. For if you have felt this love, you have experienced what our heart is truly for.

Expectation is rarely greeted with a smile. Disappointment is always felt with a frown. I don’t like the feeling of being expected to do something that I am not ready for. Putting yourself in the shoes of another allows you to understand how a simple expectation can change the path on which we walk.

I feel homesick now and then because what I once had is so far away. I have to reflect deep inside to muster up the feelings that used to sit near the surface of my being. A distant memory that is fading with time.

I have done a lot of soul searching over the years. I have learned to take time for myself to grow and evolve in matters of the heart. I have found peace amongst the chaos that would normally ruffle my feathers. There are many different shades of love if you open your heart to the possibilities.

Love is forever changing. Learning to love oneself is the most important love you can give.

So although life feels like it is forever changing and what was is no longer, we can still find a place that makes sense to us.

A place we feel warm and safe on our own.

T

The Artwork above is of the Beautiful Spirit Kathy Kromer. Although we have never met we connected through her artwork, her having the passion in doing it and I having the love for hearts. I came across her site and fell in love. We connected, she followed my writing and I envied her ability to create her art. After getting a sense of who I am and my love for hearts, she said this painting was meant for me and she sent it to me out of the blue. I am reminded each day to “Fall in Love with Life” and I smile every time I think of Kathy!

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Inspiring at Any Age!

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IMG_6140I haven’t had much time lately to take a breath let alone drift off into my own imagination and write, but I did find the time to watch this inspiring video about “Fabulous Fashionistas.” It was worth watching and I could relate to each one of these Fabulous women in one way or another!

I have never really had a sense of style. I like classic black or odds’n ends which don’t really match but I like the pieces individually. As a young girl I just wore what I liked, didn’t really think about if they went together. I care not if anyone likes how I put myself together and get ‘the look’ from my daughter regularly. The hardest part of getting dressed for me is finding a shoe that fits, not size just type. This picture cracks me up because I get it! See Jordan, the shoes can be clunky and work! Hey Granny, nice boots! The hair…debatable but again funky, not beige! I will no doubt be sport’n long grey locks at some point in my later years.

This TV Documentary on BBC features six women of advanced years (<~~~~their average age is 80 ~HA!) who share a love for style and a “screw that” attitude! I don’t share a love for style but sign me up for the “screw that” attitude! Ya gotta love women who become more feisty with age! I love all of these women and their desire to keep going at every age, with no plastic surgery or botox!

Check out the vid ladies…

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“Jealous Of The Angels”

66821_234091456740446_1156119800_nI posted this last year but felt the need to re share it with you as a reminder that Monday is NOT a holiday but a day to remember those who came before us, and those who give themselves today so that you and I have the freedom we sometimes take for granted.

We don’t have to allow the commercial aspect of marketing to rush us into the next holiday on the ‘list’ so quickly! Remembering those who gave their lives for our freedom should be savored. Remembering those who lost their lives regardless of the battle they fought should be remembered in our hearts forever.

Loss affects every one of us. Death will greet us all, eventually. Risking your life for the lives of others is the ultimate sacrifice. Material loss means nothing to those who survived a battle…of any kind. Loss puts life into perspective. We need to continue being the change we want to see in our world and appreciate the gift that those who came before us gave. Battles are fought but not always won, leaving a legacy behind to be remembered.

The Heroes who fought to give us our freedom are being whisked away too quickly so we can drown in the madness of gross obsession for stuff none of us need. Stuff! Where has all the meaning gone? Wants and needs have become one of the same. They are NOT the same. What we need is to get back to the basics before we can’t see through all the distractions swirling around us, calling us like a deep seeded addiction calls an addict. Consumerism…we have all taken a hit of that drug. STOP the madness!

I don’t think we take enough time to appreciate what’s truly important in life. Health, freedom, spirit, love, friendship, unity and peace. The essence behind what is lovely in life is being over powered by marketing, money and greed. We can’t allow the human spirit to be set aside for such meaningless garbage!

We are reminded often lately how precious life is. The love that is present in our hearts for those who gave their lives selflessly can’t be forgotten. Lest We Forget is a phrase to caution us against forgetting those who died in war.

We can’t take any of our possessions with us when we leave this world, but I do believe when one is awarded with a ‘medal of honour’ it transcends with whom it belongs in spirit. Honour in your own way those who left you behind. Give those you loved their very own medal of honour to take with them when they go.

Human spirit rises in tragedy. We naturally reach out to those who experience a loss, it’s human nature. Compassion is alive and well. We are surrounded by Heroes in memory and in life as are we surrounded by Angels. I like to believe our Heroes get first dibs on the Angels waiting…and our Angels are past fallen Heroes giving themselves once again.

“Jealous of the Angels”…by Jen Bostic

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Top 5 Regrets…Listen Up & Take Notes!

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IMG_0096_3_2There is no time for regret in life and although we all have a few, here is some insight to help lighten the load! I found this on LinkedIn and I felt the need to share because thats what I like to do.

Nurse reveals the top 5 regrets people make on their deathbed. 

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard. This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence. By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings. Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result. We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying. It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier. This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying. Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

Svaha ~

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Intellect…

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TracyHave you ever stood gazing into the eyes of a man and found yourself being turned on by his intellect. No…me neither, but by his body for sure! I’m kidding! I absolutely love in-depth conversations with the opposite sex. Intellect is sexy and when you add a splash of humour (insert angels singing here)…irresistible! When a man and women are intellectually connected it’s stimulating beyond control. The right conversation gets the juices flowing leaving us tingling with excitement! Its like a duel with dialog! Imagine that for a moment (day dream pause) a handsome guy who knows how to turn you on with his mouth using intellect! Women don’t want cheesy lines or cheap verses they want a man with substance who can also teach them something outside of the bedroom. That’s sexy!

I am not talking about men who have the gift of the gab I mean men who are incapable of being manipulated by women who use their sexuality as a tool to get what they want! Men who are looking for a woman to turn their brain on excites me! Conversation is key to any relationship lasting past the bedroom. You can be sexually attracted to someone and not have anything in common when it comes to intellect. Eye candy just doesn’t cut it when you want to take it to the next level! I’d give up the candy to have the man who can seduce me with his mind any day! I love smart men!

Knowledge is power and with power comes responsibility. Doesn’t the handsome man in the picture above look like he would be intellectually stimulating, powerful, responsible and incredibly sexy all at the same time? Great ad campaign if he’s not!

Seeking more knowledge allows growth of the human mind. I find a man who seeks knowledge very attractive, it shows a thirst for life. It shows they’re always wanting more, in turn making me want more…in more ways than one! Intellect is sexy!

~ The photo above is from the website Alex Cannon one of the leaders in fashionable sportswear, New York!

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