Parenting ~
Parenting is an ongoing struggle. Being a single parent is a challenge most of us wouldn’t want to face! The stereotypical single Mom is one who just gets by, has two kids, rents an apartment and gets some sort of social assistance. It’s the hardest job on the planet in my eyes. Holding it all together, while teaching your kids about life and love. There’s a reason why no one tells you the truth about how incredibly hard it is to be a parent. But it’s not because they want you to experience the same difficulties as they have, it’s because at the end of the day, it’s still worth it…no matter what you have to go through! Human beings are miracles created on earth, it’s a gift to become a parent. And to have a family is a blessing!
Not many women choose to be a single Mom, but it happens! Moms who do find themselves raising their children on their own need to remember that although they can’t give their child their entire wish list, they can give love and children would trade everything for love!
Single Dads have the same challenges, but they aren’t programmed like women are for being the care-giver, which in my opinion is even more difficult. Single Dads definitely have their work cut out for them.
Family today is anything but traditional, in most cases. What we need to remember is that our children are blank canvases, it is up to us to teach them by example. Be who you want them to respect and love. Show them acceptance and love of others. Let them see your compassion and empathy for other human beings. Teach them to give more than they take. Have the integrity they will strive for as they live and learn. Show your kids that anything is possible when the truth and honesty is present. Allow them to make mistakes and teach them that its what we do after we pick ourselves back up that matter, not what knocked us down. And most of all let them see you being true to yourself!
What I think is the most important element of family is love. When you have love you have it all. As long as your child feels loved, they will learn to give love. Kids naturally live authentically, and we as parents can learn a lot from these incredible little human beings. As parents it’s our responsibility to live truthfully and show them that whatever comes their way they have love and support from both their parents regardless of the structure of their family unit.
I can’t imagine my life without my kids, still to this day they’re the best thing I’ve ever done. You may not always be married to your husband or wife forever but your kids will always be your kids and you will always be their Mom or Dad. Being a parent, is forever and a blessing. Be the parent you want your kids to be!
I think what ever you choose, marriage, kids, or not, it’s YOUR choice to make. That’s the greatest part of life…choice!
We make choices every single day that are based on our thoughts, ‘thoughts become things…choose the good ones’ (Notes from the Universe).
Svaha ~
Tracy Westerholm
"Exploring the never-ending desires that fuel all life, while finding lyrical beauty in everyday happenings."
8 Comments
Richard
“What I think is the most important element of family is love.” I am moved by the strength in those words.
Love is a base element for families just like iron to metal. Love is what gives a family it’s strength; it’s bond.
Thankfully, many parents that choose not to stay together navigate the way, through love, to ensure love is maintained for their children. Many parents manage, heroically, to be single parents; together. A seemingly impossible feat but one which many are able to achieve.
Love can only inspire our children to maintain their hope for a wonderful future that includes both of their parents. Lucky those children whose separated parents subsequently find amazing love/life partners that add to the whole and keep love in the foreground. That constancy of love has a steady heartbeat that reminds our children that magical intimacy is a reality even if it isn’t always forever.
Thank you Tracy. Thank you for reminding me to radiate love to my children in all that I do. And if/when they see me love deeply and intimately with joyful passion they will be drawn back to me.
And then I won’t be single anymore.
Jane
Tracy,
I think both your kids have a good foundation of a loving family from you and Scott. I’m sure you both are trying hard to keep that love and companionship blooming. I’m also sure that you both have much to give another partner when you choose to find that person who will love you and your kids. Some couples are not as lucky. Keep those communications open.xo
Tracy Westerholm
You and Dad gave me the most incredible example of love as a guide that I have followed my entire life! I thank you both for that! xo
Tracy Westerholm
Richard, Richard, Richard!
I am smiling at the thought of moving you!
The Act of Love bonds a man and woman which magically and miraculously leads to family.
I am drawn to the words ‘That constancy of love has a steady heartbeat that reminds our children that magical intimacy is a reality even if it isn’t always forever.’ Love it and live it!!!
Our public display of love to one another is what teaches our kids how to express love.
If love is absent from their lives they have nothing to drawn upon and are left to navigate a feeling they are not sure how to express appropriately. Kids will resort to what they see outside of their home, on television or internet by default which is not magical intimacy in my opinion.
I want my kids to see love as a feeling of unconditional acceptance of another human being which involves eye contact, hugging and kissing. They need to be able to differentiate between ogling the neighbour as he washes his truck from someone who will potentially be around for a longer than… 🙂
I have no doubt your children will be drawn back to you! Just be sure of who you keep company with is not shallow by nature and you will have their acceptance AND not be single anymore!
Francesco
From my simple perspective… Your posting often have tresureable statements that you create & are given by your responders. I suggest you look back and harvest those treasures… and somehow compile them for sharing. Not sure how, but the essence of your thoughts can be captured.
Tracy Westerholm
Thank you once again Francesco for your thoughts.
I have thought of compiling some of my favourite writing and titling it ‘Tracy’s Just Sayin’, maybe I will put it back on the list of things to do! 🙂
Or maybe Treasures! 🙂
Bonnie Johnson
As a parent and a single mother myself for many years, your words touched me in so many ways.
“let them see you being true to yourself” is so important. It’s not always an easy path when you find yourself alone, really alone, without financial or emotional support and without an ex that is close by to take the reigns for awhile.
When you are the only one responsible for a child and the only one able to provide for it, there is a great deal of pressure, but if you can hold on to staying true to yourself and loving them with all of your heart then everything will work itself out.
We do the best that we know how to do at the time and sometimes we make mistakes. We all learn as we go. Parenting is a tough job but nothing is more rewarding.
I know that you practice what you preach because your kids are a testament to that. You are a great parent! xo
Tracy Westerholm
Your comment brought back so many incredible memories of you as a single Mom. You were and still are an amazing example of what you can achieve as a single parent if you do stay true to self!
Your circumstances NEVER affected the love you gave to those around you. The Universe somehow knew you could handle it and it always seemed to work out!
I have always admired your Mom skills and learned how to be in the moment taking every breath of Motherhood in, and never for granted! I couldn’t wait to have kids of my own after seeing what it was like to live with you and James for those precious years! I will NEVER forget those times and smile every time I think of any given moment we had together. However…I really think you should have told me before you boarded your flight for work, leaving James in my care at 4 years old, that I had to wipe his bum! Sorry James! That will be a story to be told at your wedding for sure! But in hindsight you needed to get on that flight and if I had been you I would have also left out that small detail too! lol
Love you Bon, you amaze me still after a bazilliion years!