I Want My Children to Know…

If you found out you were not going to be in your child’s future to talk to them about life and love, what would you want to say?

I remember seeing a Documentary years ago of a Mom who was dying of cancer. She recorded videos of herself where she gave her daughter encouragement or advice at specific milestones in life, like getting her period or her first date. It was heart breaking to watch. It must have been the most difficult thing she had ever done in life besides say good-bye. To have the courage and mind set to sit down and gather your thoughts let alone articulate advice you are not ready to give is overwhelming to even consider.

Her daughter would watch the videos when the time presented itself. Although it must have been difficult for her daughter to watch I am sure every word spoken was savoured. The strength of this woman was amazing and stayed with me for years. A Gift…

Things I want my Daughter & Son to know;

~ You’re perfect just the way you are.

~ Stay true to self.

~ Express your feelings no matter what they are; to whom ever they were meant to reach.

~ Never go to bed mad…

~ Always, always kiss your partner before they leave.

~ Never hold a grudge and never seek revenge no matter how hard it is.

~ Always forgive even if you can’t forget. In time you will.

~ Don’t spend too much time crying over the opposite sex, they are worth it but things always work out the way they should and only experience will show you that is true.

~ Never say never, because one day you will…

~ Love with your heart…reason with your head.

~ Touch is something that should never cease with your partner.

~ If you would rather be alone…make it happen.

~ Don’t let anyone take advantage of who you are.

~ Be open to everyone who walks through your door.

~ Don’t judge, it’s just not nice.

~ If you are going to say something about someone, be prepared to say it to their face.

~ If you are unsure of a situation and it involves making a choice…imagine me standing by your side and ask yourself…would I do this if my Mom were here? If not think about it a little longer.

~ Don’t gossip words hurt the most when used to make someone else feel bad.

~ Inspire one person everyday with something you do or say.

~ Your actions will speak much louder than your words.

~ Only marry for Love, not money, love will be there when money isn’t.

~ Never let anyone manipulate your heart. They shouldn’t want to.

~ Love deeply it is the only way.

~ It’s okay for a man to cry, it shows they will be a great Father.

~ Don’t fight unless you are truly passionate about what you are standing for.

~ Do unto others as you would have others do unto you…it’s a Golden Rule for a reason!

No one really knows how much time they have left on Earth. It’s so important to communicate and talk to those you love when the opportunity presents itself. I think what I would miss most was my kids sense of humor in the moment. The spontaneous sparing of funny things said…kind of like the old saying ‘I guess you had to be there.’

Be there because you can and are!

Svaha ~

"Exploring the never-ending desires that fuel all life, while finding lyrical beauty in everyday happenings."


  • Paul

    I don’t even have kids… and my contacts fell out, and it’s making my eyes water, those are not tears Tracy!
    OK so you pulled my heart strings OK, OK..

  • Debbie

    That was words well said Tracy. It would be hard to imagine not being in my kids life, but if the day came where I had to prepare them for my exit I would definitely give them words of wisdom as you so nicely did here in your article.
    Thanks for sharing Tracy

  • jacquie

    I’d copy all of yours and then add a few of my own…

    ~ a list of all the classic movies and albums they just have to see or listen to

    ~ the best way to load the dishwasher

    ~ How to save money on practically everything -whether you actually do it or not.

    I could go on… : )

    • Tracy Westerholm

      Kirk…sigh you are an amazing Man, Father, Husband and Son! Thank you!

      Jacquie…Good addition, the dishwasher one is key to a successful room mate or partner. How come no one knows how to do this simple task I ask?…every time I might add! lol

      Music…my kids don’t like my music 🙁 well at least some of it. Movies…YES!


      Bonnie…Memories are everything aren’t they! I am thankful to have had you remind me to live in each moment with my kids knowing from experience they grow up too fast. 🙂 xo

  • Bonnie Johnson

    As long as they know they are loved…and they definitely do. Creating memories together are worth more than lessons we try to pass along. Your kids have the full package, you are one of the best mothers I’ve ever known.

    Oprah had the husband, his new wife and the daughter of the woman you are talking about on one of her last shows. It was very touching. Those videos still help guide her daughter today.

  • Tracey

    This is such a beautiful and well written post Tracy, I just had to write and tell you how much it touched me. They are words that I hear myself saying to my own children, and often think of writing them down with my other love notes for them to have. If you don’t mind, I would love to copy them, and slip these strong and important messages for them to keep. They are echos of my own thoughts of heart and soul with my sincere attempts to model for them everyday with love… Thank you Tracy…this only reflects that you are and must be an amazing Mom!

    • Tracy Westerholm

      Thank you so much for taking the time to leave your voice with us. I am all about sharing so please pass them on. I did the same with a few for my own collection! I happen to know you are a wonderful Mother and person as well! 🙂
      Your voice is always welcome here Tracey! You get a VIP pass on the name alone! 🙂

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