Ryland Whittington ~

The-Whittingtons-300x209 10407872_10152072469157032_6170729355099373110_nParenting is one of the most rewarding yet challenging trips you can take. It teaches us patience, understanding and allows our heart to grow bigger than we ever imagined. Love never runs out!

This story made me smile from the centre of my being! I LOVE this family! If we had more accepting human beings in the world we would all learn to reach for the stars more often! Ryland Whittington’s story is the epitome of truly loving unconditionally and most importantly listening to the dreams and wishes of your child. We need to allow them to follow their instincts that are deep inside of who they truly are.

Sometimes, life requires us to question our pre-existing notions and norms of what we were taught. It requires us to truly think about what’s important to us and what really matters. We hope you find this story as inspirational and touching as we did.”

~Tracy

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Home ~


This post was inspired by my Male Best Friend. He has shown me that when you have unconditional love for someone you can weather any storm that comes your way, regardless of whether you are together as a couple or walking on different paths. I share a love with this man that is beyond a marriage, it is deeper than any love I have had in my life so far, bonded by two incredible children. We have learned that we have a unique connection that we believe if shared, we can make a difference in the world. We are a living example of what life after marriage can be if you truly love someone enough to set them free.

We recently spent the day together and it reminded me of what I am looking for in a partner. I am simply looking for a man who makes me feel I’m home. Think about how you feel when you have been away, living out of a suitcase and you arrive back home. You unpack your bag, relax, get comfortable and you feel at peace with just being there. There is no place like home.

When you meet someone new, I believe if you follow your heart, take your time and trust you’re where you need to be, you will find your way home. Create a history, take chances, risk it all, build trust and strengthen your bond by making memories. When you feel an ease wash over you, you will know there is no other place you need to be.

Love is the most sought after emotion. The feeling of falling in love…magical. The feeling of love for a child…overwhelming. To be loved by someone is powerful enough to bring tears to ones eyes just thinking about it. To love someone unconditionally no matter what kind of love you have is the greatest gift of all. I have experienced all of these in my life and if I am to never fall in love again I am happy to have had love so great its pure essence will last my lifetime. It makes me smile from deep inside when I think of how magical it feels to fall in love. Love doesn’t always last forever but when it washes over you, in that moment it simply doesn’t matter.

We all want to be loved by someone whether it be our parents, kids, partners, brothers, sisters, friends. Love is powerful. Love over time grows if you nurture it. Love heals heart break.

Love conquers all as they say.

Home…Phil Phillips 😉 (love this song)

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Friendship…to the Tenth Degree!

Bonnie’s post Confessions of a Killer, her being the killer, made me laugh and think about our friendship. Since Bonnie selected the word Friendship when she created this months header I thought I would relate at least one post this month to just that…Friendship! (beautiful header by the way Bon) My Red Flags post will have to wait until next Wednesday! 🙂

Bonnie’s post reminded me that I know EVERYTHING about her. The flip side of that, she knows EVERYTHING about me. There are no secrets! I react to spiders like Bonnie reacts to cockroaches. I’ve said to her son James that if he ever does something questionable and gets the stink eye for it, I would tell him a story or two about what she did that I am sure would equal what he might have done. Yes, he’s a boy and boys usually take things a step further but I can recall a time or two when Bonnie behaved like a boy! (giggle) This is where is gets tricky, I was probably with her when she did, doing the same thing, with a huge smile on my face to boot! We’ve lead one another astray on many occasions in our friendship! *wink*

I understand the cockroach fear and think I may have been the reason it became embedded into her psyche. Back in ’83, we lived in Australia for 6 months, it was 4o+ degrees 80% humidity. We had to sleep with all the window closed because there were no screens. The cockroaches in Australia can be 3-4 inches long. There were so many skittering on the street late at night it was hard to avoid stepping on them. They made a crunch sound if you did which still makes my skin crawl just thinking about it. Somehow they entered our room even though we shoved towels under the doors, we woke up in a sweat every morning because of it!

One day Bonnie entered the room and she had the Grand-daddy of all roaches on her chest, the look on my face said it all and she reacted by running at me screaming “GET IT OFF GET IT OFF!” At the time she thought it was a Huntsman spider which were the size of your hand splayed out! I freaked out and ran away from her screaming and locked myself in the bathroom letting her fend for herself…she banged on the door for quite awhile! lol I am still sorry about that, but can’t help but giggle at the thought of the look on her face!

This post is about friendship…no really! It’s about give and take. And forgiveness! Mostly forgiveness! And Karma, we can’t forget Karma, it can apparently follow you for 20 years or more! I agree that might not have been a best friend kind of thing to do, but you need to know that I’ve never told any of Bonnie’s secrets. And I have a brain full of them!

Each year we visit Bonnie and John and before I arrive Bonnie sprays the cottage we stay in with spider spray so I can sleep at night! My Karma finally arrived, 20 years later. We went out on the boat and no exaggeration a million spiders came climbing over the edge of the boat to MY seat like it was a James Bond Movie Trailer. If you listened closely I think you could actually hear the theme song playing in the background! I think they were all packing heat if my memory serves me right! Bonnie didn’t jump over board like I almost did, she stepped TOWARDS me and helped swat them off while I literally freaked out jumping up and down like I was being electrocuted. They were climbing up my legs and I could feel them in my hair, and we all know I have a head of hair you don’t want to lose a spider in! She mention later she wished she had video taped the episode so she could post it on YouTube. The perrrfect friend in my eyes! The next night on the doc watching shooting stars and comets, you could only see my eyes and nose through my draw string hoodie, she was in flip flops without a care in the world…my hero! She told me I was missing a life experience because of my fear. Yep!

Friendship is about making sure you’re with your best friend when they do something questionable so that when you do something questionable they have no choice but keep your secret! And if you can still be friends after 35 years, you don’t have to worry about who did more questionable things, because you can’t remember. Sweeeet!

All joking aside, each year I am grateful for the time I get to spend with Bonnie, the confessed killer of small helpless things. I watch and learn and somehow magically or through osmosis her strength rubs off on me making me feel empowered. She is one of the most incredible women I have had the pleasure of knowing. She loves unconditionally, without judgement. She is one of a kind and I love her for who she was and who she has become. She has taught me so much about life and love, neither of which would be the same without her. Just the thought of her makes me smile…and then giggle!

I promise if at any point in the future a cockroach skitters anywhere on or near your body I will step TOWARDS you and start swatting! Love you Bon! xo

This is classic stink eye for those of you who are not familiar with the term. (you gotta love photo booth on Mac)

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Girlfriend Threesomes!

Have you ever been involved in a Girlfriend Threesome? It can be a lot of fun, confusing, or upsetting if you’re not careful. Each girlfriend needs to be aware and conscious of the others feelings when girlfriend threesomes exist! I have never been involved in one myself that lead to hurt feelings but know friends who have. I’ve always been a bit of a loner so it never bothers me when other girlfriends get together and I don’t go.

My daughter had a friendship trio last year that caused her hurt feelings and it was painful to watch her navigate through it. My advice to her was to expand her circle of friends, and be confident in who she was, which is hard when you’re only 9 but these types of lessons are good to learn at an early age. It all worked out in the end with very few pieces to be picked up and no friendships lost. She ventured out of her comfort zone and widened her circle of girlfriends which made her stronger and more independent. Lets face it, being a girl can be very difficult, and being a girlfriend is even harder!

As we age and become more confident in who we are, you’d think these sort of girlfriend troubles would disappear, but they don’t. Girls turn into women and have the same problems, they’re just older. However, as we mature and gain experience, we do become more equipped to deal with issues that pop up with friends, but there are still threesomes that cause hurt feelings.

Have you ever been involved in a girlfriend triangle which let to hurt feelings? I’d love to hear how you navigated through it if you have. Growing up my girlfriends came from two different areas so I was always hanging out with different crowds that didn’t know one another. I think that was the foundation of my friendship style. You don’t see each other all the time but when you do it feels like it was yesterday.

Bonnie and I as you all know have been friends since we were 15, but haven’t always lived close to one another. Throughout the years we have had lots of close friends, together and independent of one another, Jacquie, Carri, Anna, Teri, Lorellei, Chris and Deb are great examples! One of our friends, Jeannie, we found out years later, Bonnie was related to! (small world) Still when I see Anna its like it was yesterday that we were hanging out, same with Teri and Deb, yet we haven’t lived in the same city for years! I never thought of another close friend of Bonnie’s as a threat to our friendship because when we get together we usually haven’t seen each other in person for a couple of months so it’s always fresh and exciting! We do talk almost every day via every social network out there though. When I hang out with Jacquie it’s the same, I get her all to myself because her friends are from a different circle than mine. That could be the reason I have yet to have a girlfriend threesome which involved hurt feelings. Variety is the spice of life, even with girlfriends!

I think the most important part of being a girlfriend is honesty, “Does my ass look fat in these pants?” “Your Booty Rocks!” You see, there is no physical criteria for being a great girlfriend, just acceptance of being different and the same! Unconditional love of the female energy is wonderful! I embrace all the unique friendships I’ve had over the years, young and old, and look forward to the new ones I’ve yet to meet on my path of enlightenment! Encouragement, support, acceptance and unconditional love is what every girlfriend should be willing to give!

Cheers Girlfriends! I love each and every one of you for the unique individuals you are! 🙂


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Oops! I Took The Wrong Baby Home!

The scenario:

You discover that your wonderful one-year-old child is, because of a mix-up at the hospital, not yours.  Would you want to exchange the child to correct the mistake?

babies switched at birth

Bonnie Johnson's PostBonnie ~

After doting on and loving a baby, any baby, but especially one you believe is a part of you, for a whole year to then be told it doesn’t really belong to you?  Ouch!  That would be a major shock, wouldn’t it?!  The bond between a mother and child after a year is iron clad, and not something easily broken.  This would be a heartbreaking situation to find yourself in.

I researched “babies switched at birth” and discovered that it does happen occasionally but not often.  Hospitals take fingerprints, foot prints, or palm prints of newborns in order to prevent babies being mixed up. Nurses also double check with the mother, checking the identity of that person as well, in order to prevent errors.  Hospitals also have policies in which a medical record number is assigned to an infant at birth, and bands with this number as well as the last name of the mother of the infant, the gender of the infant, and the date and time of birth are placed on the infant and the mother immediately after parturition before the mother and child are separated.  And yet I still found a few cases of this happening despite the policies.  Mistakes were made and when they were discovered the hospitals were sued.

What struck me most when I read about these cases was for some reason the majority of these mix-ups were not discovered until years later.  In most cases the mothers all had a feeling early on that something wasn’t right but were convinced by hospital staff that they were mistaken and everything was as it should be.  Listen to your inner voice, believe in your intuition!

So, would I exchange the child after a year to correct the mistake?  Yes, I would.  It would probably be the hardest thing I would ever have to do but for the sake of both children I would.  Again, after reading about stories where this really did happen, the saddest part, once the truth was discovered, was how the children themselves often felt.  Some discuss having the feeling that something wasn’t quite right and the feeling that they didn’t quite fit in.  One woman, when she found out the truth at 43 years old,  felt like her whole life up until then had been a lie and now she felt torn between two families.

I would have a very hard time giving up a baby I had loved so deeply for a year but I would also want to be the one to raise my own child.  If faced with this scenario I think I would ask that I still be allowed to continue a relationship with the other child too.

Post Insert JacquieJacquie ~

My daughter Emilie was one of 50 babies born at North York General Hospital in Toronto on June 12, 19……… not tellin’.  I’m a very trusting person and it never occurred to me to worry that she might accidentally get switched with another half Asian/half Caucasian baby girl.  The security on the maternity ward was unlike anything I could have imagined, and I remember having to go through at least two check points where our hospital bracelets were scrutinized before the staff would allow us to leave the floor.

I know an awful lot of bonding takes place in the first few years of life but I have to say, if this terrible situation happened to me, I’d want to get my biological child back.  It definitely would be heart-wrenching to give up a child I’d cared for and loved for a year, but I believe it would be the right thing to do.  Truthfully, I’d want to keep both babies, but I guess that wouldn’t be fair.  I wouldn’t be able to handle someone else raising my child due to hospital error.  I would hope that the other family would feel the same way and really, in a perfect world, we could all be part of an extended family group.

PS.  I have a teenager I’d be willing to trade for …let’s say… a 21 year old right now, if anyone’s interested? : )

TracyTracy gives back ~

I remember being concerned about this with my first child.  I wanted to be awake during my C-section because I had heard of this happening.  Lets call it first child paranoia.  I remember my Mom telling me in the operating room when the ID band was secure on my son’s wrist.  I think she may have double checked to make sure it couldn’t slip off.  My son was the spitting image of his Dad so no one could have made a switch with us not be aware of it.  He was also 10 lbs 3 oz and the other babies in the nursery were triplets, with the largest one weighing in at a whopping 5 lbs.  The nurses nicknamed my son baby sumo because he looked 3 months old at birth.  Any other Mom would have felt ripped off had my son been sent home with them by mistake,  kind of like getting a puppy at 6 months old.

mine!!!

I can’t imagine having to actually go through this in real life.  Unfortunately it has happened, more than once.  This topic made me reflect back on the first year with both my son and daughter.  Time goes by so quickly, and the first year is monumental for bonding with your baby.  I would have to take the perspective that I was a surrogate to this child for the year we spent together.  I am certain the mother of the child I was given would absolutely want their child back, as would I.  I would have complete confidence that she gave my child unconditional love.  When you have natural motherly instincts you love all children.  I can’t imagine not loving ‘a’ child no matter whose they were if I were responsible for it’s welfare.

Bonding in hospitalAll children are special and unique.  I would want to make the change gradually so that both children were able to adjust as naturally as possible.  I think that the babies would sense a mistake with how they are known to recognizes a mothers smell and and how they react to the sound of their mothers voice from having heard it from inside the womb.  A mother’s love is pure and unconditional so I know that after spending time with my child everything would be just fine in no time.  I would hope that after an experience such as this you would form a friendship with the other mother that I would last a life time.  Everything happens for a reason and I would just embrace it for what it was.

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