When Chemistry Heats Up ~

Sexual chemistry can heat up soon after our first impression of the opposite sex or same sex. We are attracted to different traits and have a unique list of personal preferences. We tune into every little detail. We begin profiling subconsciously, looking at ones health, confidence, how one walks, talks, mannerisms and their aura to name a few. It can be as detailed as the timbre, pitch and tone of ones voice, scent, or simply the way their eyes look deep into ours. We all have a different list that draws us closer to an individual.

Then there is the release of those wonderfully sensual pheromones we can’t hide from if we tried. They draw us in closer. I love this part because it become more personal. The main reason I believe you NEED to meet someone in the flesh to see if their pheromones draw you closer or repel you. We instinctively sense whether we are able to connect or not, allowing our union to go a step further.

Depending on your frame of mind or circumstances we can either have chemistry explode right in front of us when we first shake hands or it could be a slight delay waiting until just the right moment to ignite. Shyness or lack of confidence on either the male or female side can delay chemistry from mixing which inevitably leads us down the path of intimacy is we so choose. Timing is key. Keeping in mind that although you find a man or woman attractive it doesn’t mean you will have that spark that goes deep beneath the surface.

When initial attraction takes a sharp turn heading straight for your loins there is no other feeling quite like it…sexual chemistry can’t be faked! You know exactly what I’m talking about if you’ve experienced the real deal…if not let me describe it best I can ūüėČ

It’s an electric sensation that sparks from eye contact when you don’t look away. It sends a flutter into the pit of your stomach making you feel slightly off balance. The sensation surges through your entire body. You experience a surge of adrenaline, exhilaration and fright in waves each time your eyes connect. His energy swirls around your body sending the urge to reach out and touch him. It’s an adrenaline rush that quickens your pulse and gives you tunnel vision intensifying your touch, sense of smell and taste. You are tuned into his frequency allowing you to hear his breath from a distance giving you the strong desire to be close. You notice small details like the subtle bite of his lip as he stares straight into and through the windows of your soul. His hands give off an energy that vibrates at the same rate as yours…you are in sync.

When you have undeniable sexual chemistry with someone it’s hard to stay focused on anything but them, especially in a room full of bodies. You are distracted by their movement, smell and sound of their voice. You find them inside your head everywhere you go. You are completely and utterly out of control. Embrace this feeling as it is most intense when the union is new, changing slightly as feelings grow. Add trust and comfort to sexual chemistry and an explosion will knock you both to the ground!

Moments of attraction to the opposite sex can heat up with a simple glance in the right direction…don’t be in a hurry to look away, embrace them, for you are alive!

Sexual chemistry is just the base of the beginning…

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Exploring Male Energy


When you meet someone new it takes time to get to know who they are deep inside. Once you get past the surface layer and start to explore, the real unfolding begins. Social profiling happens naturally, giving us a clue into who someone is inside. Does he drive a Hummer, Smart Car or Hot Rod? Does he live in the City or out in the Burbs? What does he do for a living, Artist, Accountant, Fireman? What you see on the outside is not always what is on the inside. You need to dig deeper.

What someone spends their day doing can be a reflection of what interests them, sometimes, but we don’t all find ourselves immersed in our passion as a way of making a living. What matters is that we have passion somewhere within our day. Each individual soul placed on earth is here for their journey following their path. We are drawn to certain people for many different reasons. I like to think everyone has something to teach me whether it be a little or large lesson, I am open.

Our heart is what’s most important. Finding out what make it beat is the fun part. What feeds his soul? Where does he find inspiration? What does he aspire to do when he grows up? ūüėČ What is he doing to make a difference in the world? What makes his blood boil? What makes his heart race? What brings him to the point of no return? What brings him to his knees? What topic of conversation intrigues his intellect? What are his religious beliefs? What makes him giggle? What scares him? What part of the woman’s body does he find most erotic? Where are his erogenous zones? What was his most embarrassing moment? Has his heart been broken? Those are questions that are on my mind when I meet someone new. They don’t need to be answered right away but they are floating in the back of my subconscious.

It takes time for our true colours to shine. Everyone has had a struggle here or there, I view those moments as an opportunity for character building. Isn’t it more important how someone deals with less favourable situations than the perfect ones? We all make choices in life to where we are going, some earlier than others. Does it matter what we do as much as how we do it? Have we lost the desire to find out what really matters because we lack the time and energy to do so? Do we have the patience anymore to take the time to get to know someone, I mean really know someone!

Before you start to explore the male energy write down what it is you want his energy to radiate. Here are a few things on my wish list…care to add what’s on yours?

Passion, intellectually stimulating, sensual, romantic, sense of humour, spiritual, healthy, creative, unselfish, confident, affectionate, loves children, loves to travel, compassionate, inner strength, sexual compatibility, chemistry, loves life, strong moral values, integrity, loves nature!

Time and patience is the only true way to find out what is deep beneath the surface.

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Who Chooses Who?


Did you chose or chase your partner? Do you think that the woman ultimately decides if a relationship is going to go any further? Men generally pursue women but not always. Some women know exactly what they want and go for it. Just like cats if you run away the game is on. Sometimes it’s just about the chase. Playing hard to get can intrigues the opposite sex but everyone has their limit to how much time or energy they will put into a chase. I’ve always thought getting someone was the easy part, it’s keeping them that challenges who we are.

Do men stay in a relationship when they know it’s not a ‘meet my mother’¬†kind of union just for the sex? Do women string men along while they wait for ‘Mr Pretty Damn Close to Perfect’ to walk through their door? I believe both sexes are guilty of misleading the other from time to time. Honest is always the best policy!

When you introduce someone to your friends and family you validate the relationship. You deem them worthy of joining your circle.¬†There is nothing wrong with waiting to introduce your new guy or gal to your friends and family just to be sure. Keeping your status to yourself is probably a not a bad idea until you really know who you’re dating. We¬†all know it takes awhile for some peoples ‘true colors to show.

It becomes pretty obvious when a relationship isn’t going further than a surface text-a-tion-ship which I’ve posted about before. It’s getting harder to differentiate the sincere from those who are just playing a game. Nobody keeps their word anymore. More often than not men and women just say what they think the opposite sex wants to hear. Stringing someone along has become second nature. Selfish behavior is rampant in the world of relationships…“what have you done for me lately” is a common attitude. Words have become diluted, faded and no longer said with meaning. Romance is becoming extinct. I do believe there’s a lots of great people out there you just have to be patient. It’s hard to find someone who hasn’t had their spirit broken when it comes to love, trust and honesty.

What women use to attract the male energy is the key to what they get. If they are simply using their sex appeal, they get a man who wants them for just that…sex. The signal or message sent out is read correctly and then women wonder why it didn’t amount to anything but a¬†friend with benefits which is something I’ve yet to grasp. Act like a booty call and be happy with being his booty call. Pretty basic. Not that there is anything wrong with being a booty call as long as you have no expectation of ‘it’ becoming anything but a booty call. You just need to be honest with yourself about what you want.

Women sometimes allow their ego to get in the way and cloud their judgment taking the easy route by using what works, sexual manipulation. It doesn’t get you very far in the end. Being in touch with your sexuality is a great part of being human but balance is important if you want a relationship to develop into something other than a once a week romp in the hay! Chemistry is one thing but shouldn’t be confused with sexual energy which usually just leads to empty sex. For men sex is physical, for women it’s more emotional…most of the time. Not that there is anything wrong with empty sex if that’s what both parties involved are okay with. That’s where honesty is crucial.

Being able to identify when¬†he’s just not that into you¬†is easy if you ignore what he says and watch what he does, actions speak louder than words. Pretty simple if you actually listen to your instincts.

So when you are ready to choose or chase make sure you know exactly what you want and then take it slow. One thing I do know for sure is that if someone treats you like an option, don’t make them your priority their not worth it.

Regardless of who chooses who if the right person enters into your circle and the timing is right, you will be meeting the family…be careful what you wish for.

 

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Dating Etiquette

datingI’ve been thinking of dating and came across some tips online for those of us who have been out of it for awhile.¬† Scott and I have been giving each other pointers on what is acceptable and what might not be when you start to date someone ‘new’.¬† I use the term ‘new’ loosely because I visualize the person I want to date as being anything but ‘new’.¬† New is shiny and clean and something you don’t want to touch because you might leave finger prints.¬† I am thinking more along the lines of disheveled, (not dirty) someone who looks like they’ve had some life experience, needs a challenge, has been around the block before and knows all the good places for fun and adventure.

When Scott and I are hanging out which is pretty much all the time because we are best friends, we comment on what the other person has just done that might be frowned upon by someone else.¬† We all know that after being with someone for 17 odd years your comfort levels start to slide just a tad!¬† At some point we either ignore the obvious or we just don’t care anymore and have become accepting or relaxed about our partners habits or questionable behavior.¬† A few examples are flatulence, personal hygiene and wardrobe selection.¬† Guilty, guilty, guilty!

When you put yourself out there again for the first time isn’t it just better to start out the way you mean to end?¬† I think it’s going to be hard to adjust my attitude and become aware that my date isn’t going to ‘get me’ or understand me right off the bat.¬† It takes time to really get to know someone ‘new’ and there are tons of bumps in the road throughout that process.¬† History with someone has comfort.¬† But that magical feeling of not knowing what is swirling around in the mind of ‘new’ and what comes next is the flip side of the coin.¬† If you could keep some of the unknown in a relationship with history, well now you’ve got something !

Now, if we are talking about Scott, he has no filter and is who he is, so I am not sure he is even going to try to adjust any kind of attitude.¬† I am starting to get on board with his thinking, it might be the only way to go.¬† Take me or leave me, it makes no difference to me.¬† Now that might be misconstrued as an attitude of not caring when in fact it’s just being real.

Online Dating tips: (I’ve added my own comments at the end.)

1) Promptness ~ don’t leave your date waiting, nobody likes to wait for anyone, it’s rude!

2) Smoking ~¬† Don’t, if you don’t care if your here in 10 years why should anyone else?

3) Make an effort to be clean and smell good ~ Scott just read over my shoulder and gave me a pointer “Tracy you stink” it came with ‘the look’, you know the one, the ‘you stink’ look.¬† In my defense we just got back from a 10K run, point taken, I should go shower and then resume my writing.¬† Horry (that’s sorry in Spanish lol) take me or leave me, I’m writing and don’t like to be interrupted when I am on a roll. (Comfort level slide example)

4) Truth ~ flip side, if you don’t want to hear it, don’t ask.

5) Never¬†pretend to be single when you’re not. ~ come on, who hasn’t played ‘pretend I’m single‘ just once?

Here are my Dating tips:Kissing Date

1) Show up with a good attitude ready for anything.

2) Be prepared for kissing, that means floss the steak out of your teeth from the night before, gargle,brush your tongue, there is nothing worse than bad breath!

3) Who cares if he is not ‘the one’ maybe he’s fun, so get that thought out of your pretty little head that your looking for a husband and you will be guaranteed a better time!

4) If you want to sleep with him, your choice! Be safe!  But be prepared NOT to meet his mom!

5) Have absolutely no expectations, enjoy him for who he is.¬† It might only last two weeks but it could be two of the best two weeks of your life, so expect nothing and you won’t be disappointed!

6) Flirt!  Otherwise known as a compliment (if you mean it) Enjoy the flirty sexual chemistry.   It rarely lasts!

7) Leave something for next time, or there won’t need to be one!

8) Be yourself!  And let him be himself!  The all time biggest mistake women make in my opinion is to try to change the man they start out with.

Dating should be a blast!¬† Who really cares if your not the perfect match.¬† Nobody is so stop trying to find perfect.¬† And if it doesn’t work out maybe you found a good friend, a Best friend even!¬† To hang out with your best friend at the end of the day, isn’t that what we are all looking for?¬† Just go with it¬† and have fun!Tracy

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Chemistry…

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart

What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word “Chemistry”.¬† If it’s your high school Periodic table of the Elements, then we’re not on the same page, but keep reading because it feels like being back in high school, when you do have it.

It’s that feeling you get when you look into someones eyes that you are extremely attracted to for the very first time.¬† That intense and inexplicable feelings of sexual attraction when the person you desire is nearby.¬† It’s electric, overwhelming even, which makes you think of nothing else but sensual, erotic thoughts involving the other person.¬† It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, it’s out of this world!!¬† You can’t ignore it,¬† if you do,¬† it will drive you crazy.

The only feeling that has even comes close for me was a¬†helicopter ride for the first time.¬† It was such an adrenaline rush all I could say the entire time we were in the air was “Oh My God!”¬† What a feeling!

Scientific research has shown that pheromones can play a huge role in sexual chemistry. ¬† Pheromones are subconscious sex signals that the body gives off to attract the opposite sex.¬† These invisible airborne molecules are thought to influence one’s emotions and sexual behavior.

You can’t make chemistry happen, it’s either there or it’s not.¬† It’s a basic instinct that you can’t control, so why not embrace it for what it is, an energy felt between two people that makes you feel alive and youthful.

Chemistry leads you down a path that can not be easily changed.  If you do follow this path, in most cases it leads you right to the beChemistry between the sheetsdroom.  If you feel this chemistry with a certain someone outside of the bedroom chances are it will also be felt when your between the sheets.

The major difference between how men and women feel about this phenomenon is that men seem to be able to have great sex without such sexual chemistry, while women seemingly cannot.  Have you ever felt this incredible energy with someone?

Tracy

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