I am certainly no marriage expert but I do have parents who met when they were 12 so I had two great role models growing up. Does that make my odds better at having a successful marriage? Define successful? I personally think the constitution of marriage needs to bend slightly with the times. (ie same sex marriages) Everyones idea of marriage is quite different.
I don’t think anyone should ever compare their marriage to another. It should really be about what you define marriage to be; romantic, arranged, conventional, convenient, contractual, legal or a verbal commitment. We are all unique and have our own ideas of what marriage should be. For some, marriage doesn’t even have to include love. I personally wouldn’t marry for anything but. If you had nothing except the cloths on your back, would you still be smiling knowing you had him walking along side you on a path to the unknown?
I think if you are even going to consider tying the knot make it loose to start. Tying the knot sounds so restrictive. In my opinion you should be able to walk independent of the other, side by side, not smothering one another. Let each other breathe, allow room for each of you to unfolding and grow, every now and then distance yourselves to miss one another.
Lawmakers in Mexico City are proposing a new marriage licence that would allow couples to split after a two-year trial rather than go through a lengthier divorce process. No more ’till death to us part’, quite frankly the odds are against you when you take this leap of faith to begin with. A life sentence? Yup that’s right the same man for the r-e-s-t of your life. (insert w-o-m-a-n if it makes you feel better) If you’re not madly passionately lustfully in love, I say don’t do it!
A brief two year commitment would be a way of testing out married life. If however you decide before the two years are up, you have to file and go through regular divorce proceedings. Isn’t that what living together is? Marriage is not for everyone, people change which simply can’t be predicted.
Do you really need a piece of paper to be in a committed union? It’s just a piece of paper… if it’s just a piece of paper why not do it? Again it’s what you’re okay with, not what everyone ‘thinks’ is acceptable.
Lots of women compare their marriage with their friends, which to me is a big mistake. It is just another way of keeping up with the Joneses. Comparing your marriage with anyone else is a recipe for disappointment. It’s almost as bad as comparing your sex life. Expectations should be thrown out the window with obligations put on us from past relationships, generations and social behaviours.
Marriage and relationships are about compromise and redefining what it means to you as you grow and unfold. Marriage doesn’t always last forever but if you enter into it loving passionately with an open heart it will be a life experience that can last forever.