Imagine If You Can…

Bonnie Johnson's PostImagine if you can…you are a young person and you’ve fallen in love.  In every waking moment all you can think of is the person who has captured your heart.  Even your dreams are sweet scenes of passionate moments together.  Every thought is consumed by how much you want to be with them.

Imagine then, that you are lucky enough to marry this person.  You are only in your twenties and you have so much to learn about life and even about yourself.  You know passion intimately at this stage.  It is alive when you make love and also when arguments arise.  You begin to grow up together.  You have no choice.  You now have babies to love and raise together.

The next two decades have you side by side working to raise your children and carve out a comfortable life.  You both are working so hard that sometimes you forget to notice each other and then suddenly you stop what you are doing.  And you see them again like it’s the very first time.  Every cell of your being tingles with love and appreciation for this person.  The one.

Your children have moved on now.  Life slows down a little.  Together you marvel at how quickly those previous years flew by.  You slowly get reacquainted with each other and fall into comfortable patterns of routine.  You are best friends.  Words are not always necessary.  The love you share is solid.  Neither of you doubts the other in any way.

The years seem to accelerate now.  You have shared so much laughter and joy but there has been some terrible sadness too.  One of your children has passed away after a battle with cancer and it almost kills you too.  On the days you felt you couldn’t tread water any longer and you just wanted to stop moving and sink below the surface, your loves hand was under your head holding it up. You took turns then propping the other up.

Time goes on.  Many things change.  Your children’s children are now having children.  You live together in a small space because you realize it’s all you really need.  The days seem endless at times but then why does Christmas seem to come around faster every year?  Each of you has body parts that ache and some parts have even stopped working altogether.  You take turns complaining.  You are pretty sure your ailments are worse than theirs are, but you worry about them too. Your friends and relatives are dying regularly now.  It makes you stop and take stock of how far you’ve come and again, how grateful you are to have shared this journey with your love.

You have been married now for sixty eight years.  Sixty eight years!  You have been together almost everyday for all of those years.  The health of your partner has declined to the point that you cannot look after them by yourself any longer.  They are moved to a facility where doctors and nurses can care for them.  You are left alone.  They are left alone.  You each worry about the other one because you know they are so lonely and afraid.  You want to be the one to prop them up again.  You know how to be there for them better than anyone else.  The rules of the facility don’t allow you to be together though.  You both have to be equally and identically incapable before they can put you together.  When does that ever happen?

Imagine if you can…a full happy lifetime spent with your love but in the end you are not “allowed” to be together.  It’s against the rules.

It’s just not right.  Something is very wrong with our system and how we care for our elderly.

Bonniegrowing old together

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That’s the Story of my Life

jacquie janzen yee

If you were to write a screenplay of your life, what movie genre would it fall into… and who would you want to play you and why!

Jacquie’s Take~

I thought about this idea as I was looking through a stack of unedited, unsorted photographs a few days ago.  When we put together a scrapbook or photo album, what we’re doing, in a way, is creating our own version of a still-life mini-series depending on what we choose to add or leave off the pages.  Even as I write this I’m creating a mood that could be interpreted by someone else and is entirely dependent on the words I choose to use.

So what would my life story look like up to this point?  In all honesty I would have to say a teen romp or an English farce.  I’m constantly expecting the Maturity Police to pull up outside my house and haul me away.    Sometimes I make drama happen when none is necessary.  In all good ‘coming of age’ films the lead characters learn important life lessons and are enriched by the experiences they face.  I’m always finding out new things about myself and trying to get a handle on the world so I think the genre fits (a little too snugly, actually)

Who would I like to play me?  Nicole Kidman, but if she were busy I’d settle for Sarah Michelle Gellar,  you know, the vampire slayer.  She’d have to get some highlights put in but she’s gives great tongue in cheek.  Anyone who can pull off a role like Buffy and really sell it must be talented.  And we have the same ski jump nose.

Bonnie Johnson's PostBonnie’s Two Cents~

I’m going to start with who I would choose to play me.  When I pondered this question one name popped into my head right away.  I don’t know why exactly except that perhaps it’s because I think she is a great actress and she is multi-faceted enough to be able to capture my many personalities (I am a Gemini after all).  Plus she is close to my own age and plus I just admire her.  Mary Louise Parker.

As for which genre my screen play would fit into, well that’s a tough one.  You see my life so far has not been one big drama or one big romance or one big comedy or one big tragedy, although it has had many scenes of all of those in it.  I would hate to have Woody Allen want to do the play or movie of my life because to me that would signal “not much going on” in this production.  (Sorry Woody, just my personal opinion)  By the way, who calls their kid Woody?  Mr. and Mrs. Allen and Mr. and Mrs. Harrelson I guess! Weird choice for a baby boy’s name  in my opinion.

I’d like to see the story of  “Me” be a great mix of all those genre’s and when the production is over I’d want the audience to all smile deeply and leave the theater with a warm fuzzy feeling.  I’d like the story of  “Me” to linger in their thoughts and to revisit them often when something in their own life reminds them of my story.  I’d like there to be lots of life lessons that they either learn by in this production or at least relate to.  I’d like to have the audience laugh out loud often, wipe away some tears occasionally and nod knowingly all the way through.

TracyTracy’s thoughts~

Great topic Jake!  It really made me think about my life and the tone of it so far.  Without a doubt I knew immediately my movie genre would be a Passionate Love Story with heart wrenching scenes about love and soul searching.  It would have more than one story line playing out the search of love, passion and lust.

As you walk out of the theater you have renewed hope that there is true love out there.  And the ending …well Bonnie just knows me so well so I am going to go with what she said in yesterdays post ‘Princess Reality‘.A handsome prince will ride his stallion into her life, swoop her up into the saddle with him and while she clings to his strong chest they gallop into the sunset to live happily ever after”…sigh ?… or as reality would have it… she lives her life in the moment embracing each and every souls energy that she meets along her path to her destiny, all while having a passionate happy ending.  Yes I said ‘happy ending’  (insert giggle here) which is left open for interpretation…  I personally hate movies that leave anything to interpret in the end, I like to SEE that it ended happily.   Anyone know a good psychic?

Who will I have play me?  I am going to have to say Diane Lane.  I have loved how vulnerable she is when she plays women in love.  Diane draws me right in each time, she is so authentic.  She is around my age give or take a few years and I think she is an incredible actress.  I especially loved her in ‘Unfaithful’, ‘Under the Tuscan Sun’ and ‘Nights in Rodanthe’.Happily Ever After

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Love is Forever…by Lawrence Thomas

“I have been inspired by the writings of Lawrence Thomas and wanted to share his truthful, passionate words with you.  He has touched my soul with this piece.  Understanding the male perspective, a gift for me truly.  I believe our paths were meant to cross.  Thank you for sharing a piece of yourself with us and giving us some insight into the male mind.  Many of us will no longer feel like ‘the only one’ and that is one of the reasons Bonnie, Jacquie and I created Tara Cronica.”  Tracy~

Love is Forever…by Lawrence Thomas

Lawrence ThomasSunday, July 6, 2008 at 6:23pm Splashing my freshly shaven face, I looked up into a faded mirror. Grasping the outer edges of the water basin, I stepped into my reflection. I removed one hand briefly to run my fingers through my sodden hair, and then I leaned in to take a closer look. Into my weary eyes, I searched desperately for the man that I once saw staring back at me. I clenched the basin tighter, lowered my head and I realized that I don’t like the image the mirror revealed anymore. My eyes had once been so full of dreams; full of passion. They expressed a lust for life and everything it had to offer. Now their vision discolored, infatuations and a lifetime of aspirations all but forgotten.

For the better part of my twenties, Elaine’s soft blue eyes had been the last image I had seen before falling asleep. Many cold nights her warm figure curled into me, as I lay awake searching endlessly for answers, and many mornings I awoke to the same lost and lonely reflection of my tired eyes staring back at me.

I spent so much time searching my heart for the grounds of my unhappiness, that I hadn’t allowed myself to appreciate the little things that made her so special. My uncertainties really had nothing to do with her. I did love her, but for some reason, I was not content with what we had together.

I tried desperately to push her away, because having her hate me seemed so much easier than letting her go. As I stood disappointed, staring into that mirror’s image, I could see how much trying to push her away was slowly breaking her. Yet, even with how hard I tried to distance myself from her, she still remained by my side. I suddenly appreciate that she couldn’t hate me; she didn’t have it in her heart.

As I rummaged through my thoughts, gaping into that murky basin drain, I realized I had to let her go.

One last dinner together, final thoughts passed as we drove about a winding countryside, and as the colors of autumn leaves change, so did the seasons of our lives together. Somehow I had never found her more beautiful than I did that moment.

As I rested my eyes in hers, I took her hand and looking into her soul, and told her one last time that I loved her. Even with how hard it was to say goodbye, we both know that it was the right thing to do.

Maybe we had been holding on to the memories of so many years ago, or quite possibly we were fearful of being alone. Maybe we worried about hurting one another? Perhaps we were really afraid of living because neither of us could honesty say that’s what we were doing those final months – at least not the lives we had both dreamed of.

In those final moments, I realized that no matter how much I loved Elaine, my dreams would always live somewhere in my heart. I knew that if I didn’t start to listen to the desperate cries deep within me, that in being afraid to live, those dreams and the passions my soul lived to feel, were slowly dying.

I truly believe it’s our unhappiness with ourselves that questions the fate of a relationship. The problem is we either don’t know it, or simply don’t know what we are unhappy with.

Many years have gone by now, and since moving on, I have felt my heart thank me for finally giving the thoughts that circled hopelessly through my soul, the opportunity to live. I have felt the inner peace of not being afraid of life anymore.

As I look up, I see the reflection of a man once more full of life; full of passions; a man with not only dreams, but visions that have been realized. I have felt the sometimes painful, yet magical infatuations of love again. I have allowed myself to be inspired by the wisdom life offers us when we not only yearn for more from it, but do something about getting more out of it.

Regrets, I don’t believe in them, but I certainly wish we didn’t have to hurt the ones we love searching for who we are and what it is we want from this journey.

Even when a relationship is not meant to be, it’s hard not to continue caring for someone in some way, for everything they were to you and for what they taught you about love, life, and especially about yourself. I hope Elaine knows I will never forget the way she looked into my eyes when she said she loved me. To be loved in that way by anyone, is the greatest gift life will ever share with us.

In the end, with our painful expressions of separation, we didn’t do or say anything to make that moment one we would later regret. We both knew those final words would last in our hearts forever.

Breaking up is always a painful memory, yet by ending that part of our lives with a smile and by expressing how much those past years meant to us, the last feelings we shared weren’t full of anger or hatred; just the one thing that kept us together through it all – Love.

No matter whether a relationship ends through infidelity, a difference of opinion, or simply different dream paths, one of the many things my time with Elaine taught me, is that in the end, whether you want it to or not, love lives on somewhere in the heart, and always will.

Elaine was the first woman I ever loved, and for understanding me, always believing in me, and for loving me through it all (even those cold lonely nights when I couldn’t find it in my own heart to love myself), a part of me will love her forever. I will never forget how wonderful it felt, to be loved the way she loved me.

Copyright © 2008 Lawrence Thomas

Shaking the Tree Lawrence Thomas Website

Tracy

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In the Church of Wind….

RidingI’ve been riding motorcycles for about 14 years now off and on and  love it!  There is nothing like flying down the highway by the seat of your pants with the wind in your hair!  Everyone should experience that at least once in their life!  I highly recommend it at any age!

Riding as a passenger is a great way to experience the feeling of freedom motorcycles give you but there is truly no comparison to riding your own.  If I can do it, so can you.  I took the BC Safety Council course first and while I was learning to ride, I had a Black Fat Boy Harley Davidson on order.  I will never forget the adrenaline I felt the day I got the call that my bike was ready to be picked up!  Tracy's Fat Boy HDI was nervous with excitement and shaking with anticipation!  I remember riding on the highway for the first time.  I had to pull over because it was just too much for me, the excitement that is!  I kept looking down at the road  thinking if I just stepped off at 80 km an hour I would be toast!  I didn’t have the protection my Jeep gave me.  Your life depends on you paying attention.  I kept playing back in my mind when I was about 7 years old and rode a mini bike for the first time,  how I just gunned the throttle and ran into a tree.  This was not a mini bike but a 710 lb motorcycle that was like riding a Clydesdale horse in comparison to a Pony.

1992 Yamaha FZR1000I am not sure I would have ever rode unless Scott had inspired me to try it after being a passenger on his rice rocket for a couple of years.  I loved riding with him because I always felt that I was in good hands and I knew he would always keep me safe.  Riding as a passenger with him was like going on a thrilling ride at Disneyland at times.  He educated me on how motorcycles work so I completely understood what they were capable of doing.  I watched motorcycle racing to get the feel of what you could actually do without tipping over.  He took me up to Whistler and Cypress Mountain on several occasions so I could see for myself when you were almost sideways, able to touch the ground that was flying beneath you at a million miles an hour, you just learned to dance with the bike, not fight it.  He did make it feel like dancing.  You had to relax, let go of your fears and just go with the flow.  That is where my trust in this man started.  He should have raced bikes for a living, it is his one passion that he can not live without.  Riding literally changes his mood.  He needs to ride to have balance in his life and the smile on his face after a ride can not be duplicated by doing ANYTHING else.

Scott

Scott told me a story about the day he knew he loved motorcycles.  He was 5 years old and it goes like this.  He was driving with his Mom, Dad and Brother in their green Mercury Meteor going on holidays when he heard a rumbling coming up from behind their car.  He saw a motorcycle past by his window and then another and another, they just kept coming.  They started to come beside his brothers window so he sat up and looked out the back window of the car and there were motorcycles everywhere he looked.  They surrounded their car and kept coming for about 4 minutes straight.  It was a Notorious Motorcycle Club.  He remembers this experience like it was yesterday and told me there was nothing else like it for him as a boy.

single head lightsWe were out for a ride the other day flying down the highway when we passed a couple of motorcycles at the side of the road that looked like they were waiting to hook up with more.  I just knew at that moment the day would be a different.  We were cruising at 110 km when it started.  I looked in my mirror and saw nothing but single headlights as far back as I could see.  My heart started to race and the adrenaline was instantly pumping through my veins.  It felt like the first time I rode on the highway.  Within seconds I was riding beside a Motorcycle Club.  As the first one approached he looked over and acknowledged me, smiled, it felt surreal.  There was a wave of at least 50 riding side by side.  I couldn’t look away!  The only words that I can even think of to describe it was that it was like a religious experience!  When in your life do you ride down the highway along side 50 serious bikers and not ride off the road!  I rode up beside Scott after they thundered by us and we just smiled and knew we both felt the same.  The wave of bikers passed like a swarm of bees heading for the hive.  I asked myself  later that if they were just a bunch of guys out for a ride would it have been so exhilarating?  Not at all.  These guys had presence, there was a reason that it felt this way.  We slowly fell behind and watched the swarm of bikes disappear into the mountain pass.

We got to our destination and had a great lunch on the deck of  ‘Raven’s on the Beach’.  Very fitting as the Raven is one of  Tara’s creatures!  We went to ‘Dragonfly Gifts’ and I bought a Arya Tara necklace for the ride back.  After all she is the Protectress of Earthly and Spiritual Travel along the road to Enlightenment.  And I still needed to get back home!

It doesn’t matter what you ride just as long as you do.

I think I need another…Triumph ThruxtonTracy

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If I could magically re-invent myself as anything I’d…

HAPPY EASTER EGG HUNTING !!

Bonnie’s take~

For some reason this stage in many peoples lives (mid forties) seems to be ripe for re-invention.  Maybe it’s because we realize “Whoa, we’re half way there/done.”  There are many other factors that could spark this too, like divorce, illness, spiritual awakenings, the economy etc., and really these can occur at any age.

The funny thing about this is that it’s truly possible.  We can all re-invent ourselves whenever we want to.   The only thing that ever holds us back from doing so is our own fears and skewed belief systems.  We all have ’em though, but let’s just pretend for a moment that we don’t.  The sky’s the limit.  You can be anything you want to be.    I’ll go first.

fairy-godmother1Poof!    The smoke slowly clears and what emerges is…well, still me I guess, but in perfect shape and health and looking radiantly happy.  I’m radiantly happy because I still have my loving family and friends but I also have a sense of real purpose in this world.   My career is incredibly fulfilling because I not only make ridiculous amounts of money (which I share happily because it never stops coming in) but also because I can see that what I’m doing is helping to make the world a better place.

None of that  is too far from what my life is now except the copious amounts of money and the large sense of  “making an important difference”.   I am working on this re-invention right now and I do believe it’s all possible.  Anything is possible.  So the first step is complete…belief in self…the rest should be easy.

Can’t wait to hear how you might re-invent yourself too.   ~Bonnie

Jacquie’s $0.02…

I’ve really had to think hard on this one, Bon!  If I say I’d like to be an actor, then I really should try to be one right now.  If I want to be a successful artist then I should be working on my skills.  I’m pretty OK with all the good and not so good in my life.  I would like to be more organized, though. Ultimately we’re in charge of our destiny.

But if I could click my heels and be a new me it would have to be as a mom of several more kids.  I’d love to have had at least a couple more but it just wouldn’t have been easy financially.  So I’d like to re-invent my life to include a huge inheritance or great paying job, enough to enable us to have bought a Walton’s style family home with lots of bedrooms.  And I’d want Wonder Woman’s taut tummy.  I’d take Angelina and Brad’s chateau in France off their hands if I could.  Believe me, I’d have help in the form of a chef and housekeeper, but I’d still be a great ‘hands on’ mom.

Yeah, I’ve had such a wonderful experience with my three brats that I think adding a few more, naturally or through adoption, would have just made life even more rewarding. ~ Jacquie

Tracy gets on the scale~

I am not sure I would  re-invent myself at all.  I like the twists and turns my life has taken so far.  I think we re-invent ourselves naturally every time our life takes a turn for the better or worse at that time.  Life experience creates change, one being in ourselves.

I believe I am heading in the direction of where I am meant to be, so I am good with my life for the basics.  If I were given the opportunity to wave that magic wand I would just want a peek of seeing myself living the success I imagine.  But that would mean I have fast forwarded past the hard work it takes to create something you are proud of, so I would hand the wand off to someone else who needed it more than I.  So I guess I would like to see the end result but still go through the challenges of getting there.  I agree with Bonnie that the sky is the limit and Jacquie that if you really wanted something, you would be doing it.  I think I am doing it, and it’s never too late.

I have faith that one day I will be acknowledged for my hard work in pursuing something I have passion for.  If you ask me what I see myself doing in 5 years however, perhaps that is another Sunday topic, I would be doing what I am doing now but with years of experience behind me. I would have thousands of articles in my back pocket that hopefully inspired someone else to live their life with passion and purpose.  I think we all are continually re-inventing ourselves each and every time we move forward in life and make a change that moves us to where we are meant to be.

~Tracy

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Tag Team Sunday ~ The Naked Truth

Hey Ladies, we’re gonna talk nudity.

How comfortable are you with it?  In movies?  In your own home?

Jacquie dips her toe in the hot tub…

This would be the perfect time to say something titillating and, believe me, I’ve been debating which route to take, but ultimately I have to stay true to my voice. I think there’s way too much unnecessary nudity in movies. Hear me out. I think nudity in porn flicks is necessary; in every movie produced by the major studios, unnecessary! Depends on what you’re looking to watch and what’s going to satisfy your entertainment needs at the time. Both types of films have their place. I just don’t want to go to Blockbuster, rent something and be given a helping of gratuitous nakedness with my romance and action. I’ll allow that sometimes it is important to the story. Kate Winslet in The Reader, for example. That movie needed all that sex and nudity (did I just say that?) in order for the audience to truly feel the awkwardness and passion of the two main characters.

I guess because of my background in art I feel very comfortable with the naked human body as an object worthy of admiration and adoration. Male and female. I’m too uncomfortable to do the full on nude beach thing (topless in Europe, woo hoo) but I have posed for artists in the buff and felt really powerful and feminine and would do it again.

I love the beautiful lines and curves and angles we possess, but I just don’t think they have to be displayed all at the same time. I subscribe to the ‘flash one great body part at a time’ rule. Think Michele Obama and those incredible arms! That’s sexy! Or J Lo in that deeper-than-deep-belly-button-revealing-cleavage dress that covered her arms and legs. Hot.

While in Vegas a few weeks back I went to a burlesque show at Forty Deuce at the Mandalay Bay. I have to say it was so much fun to watch! The dancers were fantastic athletes, spinning on poles, hanging from scaffolding in the ceiling and twisting and gyrating to the cheering packed house. But there was no nudity involved! As each layer of clothing was removed you could clearly see the skin-toned tasseled bra and panties that remained. The mostly male audience loved it and so did I.

As for nudity at home, nobody wants to see me running around in my meat suit folding laundry and vacuuming!  I take that back, I know one person who would.

jacquie2

 

Tracy’s naked truth….
Nekid...well half.Let’s get Nekid! I love the naked body! I’ve skinny dipped and suntanned in private naked. I would sleep naked but what if the house caught fire and I were naked with not enough time to put on pants. I’d be running out of the house naked to young in shape handsome firemen! I am okay with the naked part as long as I could move slow but that doesn’t go with”THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE”! (have you ever googled ‘running naked’? Apparently not a fear for most!)

All joking aside, I am fine with nudity in movies but I like it better when they leave more to the imagination. I am not interested in pointless spring break style nudity. The movie ‘The Notebook’ however has every element ever needed in a nude scene. A building climax, a ridiculously handsome guy (Ryan Gosling), passion, soaking wet rain kissing and clothes ripped off. I could keep going) Yikes! I would do that scene for sure if it could be done in one take, maybe two…or three if it was reeeallly needed. I’d like to see the look on my face while watching a good nude scene actually. You know the face people make when they look like they ‘think’ they are in the scene. That’s me.

Getting Naked

I would not, however, run away from someone in bright light buck naked unless my life depended on it. Still then, I think I might first try running backwards or at least try to talk my way out of having to run. My thought process would be this.“Oh no…no, no, no your kidding right, this can’t be happening, oh shit, seriously, oh my god I hope he doesn’t have a video camera”. Admitting that would give the impression that I wasn’t happy with my booty. I am, in the right light.  Florescent tubing or bright spring sun, not doin it! Candle light, all over it! Well, the naked truth can leave one feeling vulnerable and in need of another run! Okay I’m over it. Who wants to get Naked?

Tracy

Bonnie brings up the rear….

Naked. I love naked. Especially in fresh clean sheets next to my man’s naked body. It’s a sensual sensation.  Ooooh and swimming naked in a warm ocean during a full moon is the best!

I spent enough years in Australia in my youth to feel completely comfortable being topless on the beaches…there. It’s a whole different story here in Canada however. In Australia you felt almost ridiculous as a 2o year old with a bikini top on and more than a string thong on the bottom. Back in Canada I was quick to fall back into the more modest beach attire.

I have to agree with Tracy about nudity in movies. I don’t mind seeing nudity, it doesn’t offend me, but I prefer to have my imagination tantalized.

I’ve been to a couple of nude/topless beaches in Europe and one in Hawaii. Here’s what I learned. It ain’t always pretty, but it is real. And I’m ok with that. I don’t find the human body offensive in any way. What I took away from those experiences was how people, no matter what their shape and size was, were completely ok with their own bodies. How liberating!

When I look in my full length mirror at my naked body at this stage in my life I struggle to accept the beauty of my naked body. I can easily see faults that I’d like to have improved. But you know what, I’ve thought the same way since I was a young woman! When I look back now I think “what were you worried about, you looked great”, and I’m sure I will think the same thing ten or twenty years from now when looking back at the body I wear right now.

Anyway, I promised to bring up the rear…I love a man’s naked rear! Yep, I’m a butt girl. My own rear is not my favourite ‘ass’et, but I’m sure I’ll really appreciate my 45 year old rear when I’m 65.

Bonnie

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Let’s Talk About Sex Baby! by Tracy

Do you remember that song?  “let’s talk about sex baby let’s talk about you and me“ I remember singing it while dancing with my girlfriends, back when it was sort of taboo to say ‘SEX’ out loud!  We were flirts and loved every moment of it!  We never meant anything by it we were just girls having fun!sexy-mag-cover

Sex sells!  It’s everywhere we go.  I am not talking about porn sex.  There is nothing sexy about watching porn to me.  I’d rather be doing it than watching someone else make that ridiculous face.

I am talking about sex appeal.  Admit it, you purchase some stuff because of sex and how it’s marketed.  Everyone wants to have sex appeal.  Some of us have just given up.  We don’t think we fit into the standard sex appeal image of having a certain body type, size or shape.  If you don’t think you have sex appeal you can definitely get it.  Changing your perception is a good start.

For instance I am writing this post completely naked, to see if I feel sexier than when I am in my uniform (yoga pants).  Ohhhh let me tell you I feel wayyyy sexier!  I just need the high heel slippers with the fluffy feathers on them! (soooo not me!!)  If your not comfortable naked then try putting on a sexy outfit or tune in to the show ‘How to Look Good Naked.‘  It’s a great example of when woman change their perception of themselves and eliminate bad habits of dressing down, with the end result being them comfortable in their own skin.Dove 'wendy'

One afternoon I was sitting on a deck with a girlfriend of mine, early evening, downtown.  As we sat there girls strutted by one after another.  It was hard not to notice.  Most of these girls were not the skinny model type.  These girls had curves and used them to their advantage.  Their hips swung and shoulders swayed with such confidence!  Everyone of them oozed sex appeal and knew it!  These girls had it go-in on!  I think it’s how you feel about yourself and what your wearing underneath.  If your wearing monster gonch you feel like your wearing monster gonch.  Slip on a black satin pair of panties with a matching bra and voila!  Sex appeal!  I just spent $160.00 on lingerie and was saving it for some reason.  Ya I know, for what?  I finally tore into the bag and started wearing them and instantly felt sexier.  It’s like you have a secret  when you wear pretty lingerie.  Your eyes don’t lie when you feel sexy.  Sultry Sophia Loren

Sophia Loren is famous for her sex appeal and sultry eyes.  And she was(IS I stand corrected) a curvaceous woman still at 74!

I went to a ‘passion party’  with a girlfriend one night, a first for me if you can believe it!  I can say honestly I have never laughed so hard before at what they had just sitting out on the table for everyone to touch!  At first glance I would have thought it was a table full of baby toys…until I got closer.  I picked up one item and when the voluptuous sales girl told me what it was for I actually dropped it and then almost pee-d my pants laughing with my friend.  Wait for it….“A WHAT PLUG? I exclaimed?”  I felt like a school girl laughing hysterically with my friend while the sales girl talked so candidly about how to use it !!!  My face went red at even the thought that this girl thought I WANTED the explanation!  She had done it a thousand times before so it was like she was selling Tupperware.  I couldn’t get past the fact that these women were all bonding and story telling of what they tried or had and what were their favorite items.  I felt at times like I was in a Twilight Zone Movie or I was being PUNKED.  I didn’t know what half the stuff was for!  My mouth dropped open more than once.  (for sure Bonnie will comment on this but don’t believe her!)  I thought it was extremely educational but it got creepy for me when they had cherry nipple cream/lip-balm for everyone to try in the bathroom.  I drew the line there. Most of the woman in the room made a purchase, yes I did too.  Peer pressure forced me to buy the ‘cherry chapstick’  which I threw out because it burnt my kisser!  Yikes that was a close one!  I purchased another item ‘behind closed doors’ and it will stay that way, but in hind sight I wish I had bucked up!  Elastic Boundaries ladies, just go with the flow!

to be continued….T

Tracy

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Twenties versus Forties

For those of you who know me you are aware of the fact that I just turned 40, once more.  Let me start off by saying I love 40 !!  So much in fact, it’s going to be my age for quite some time to come.

Twenties

Twenties

Seriously though, what the hell happened?  I feel like I was twenty yesterday.

When I was in my twenties I used to wonder what women in their 40’s who were single thought about it.  I think I felt sorry for them and wondered if they were sad to be walking alone with no life partner.

There were three reasons for being single;  widowed, divorced or never married.

In my twenties I used to think that being widowed would be the worst of the three.  Having lost the love of your life would be tragic.  Now I think at least you loved.  I am talking about the kind of love that gives you  butterflies when he walks in the room.  Where the chemistry you feel fills the room and it can’t be ignored, no matter how hard you try.  The kiss!  The passion in the kiss that never ends.  This kind of love is not waited for anymore.  So those who have lost their love at least have the gift of memories, that include love.

In my twenties, I thought older women who never married didn’t find the love of their life.  Just thinking of that made my heart ache.  In my 40’s I think that perhaps they just didn’t settle!  We live in a “I need it now society’ where we no longer have the patience to wait for anything, including love.  The women who never married were strong enough to continue their journey alone.  They were living authentically without someone, instead of compromising themselves for someone.  I think settling would be the worst.

And divorce, in my twenties, in my opinion meant you simply gave up.  In my 40’s,  well, there is a silver lining in every dark cloud, you just need to look for it.  It’s all about perception.  If you’re honest and stay true to yourself you should be able to move forward with no fear in life, with or without a partner.  I must say that I like my 40’s for the depth and understanding it has brought to my life.  Being alone in your twenties can be unsettling.  Being alone in your 40’s, what’s that?  When you reach midlife, single or attached, you start to live your life for you.  You experience and accept relationships for what they are;  short, long, sexual, intellectual, romantic and friendship.  On your terms !  Neither widowed, divorced or never married  seem so bad to me now that I am in my 40’s.  Perception is a frame of mind.

Forties

Forties

Tracy

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My Morning Pages

Typewritter
When you discover or rediscover what your passion is and immerse yourself in it sometimes it can take awhile to get your creative juices flowing freely again.

Tara Cronica is my passion.  Writing content to fill the pages is a process that I have been working on for months.  I wanted to share with you what is helping me get back in touch with my creative side.

My two partners Jacquie and Bonnie both suggested I read the book ‘the Artist’s Way’ by Julia Cameron, where she suggests you write what are called your morning pages. You are meant to sit uninterrupted and write three handwritten pages of what ever comes to mind.  Bonnie does this religiously and loves it.  I do it on occasion as well but I have another version of what also works for me.  I run while listening to music.  Music inspires me to write and running is my form of meditation.  I open my mind to any thought that might want to enter.  As soon as I set out on my run my attitude immediately changes and I feel empowered.  Running to me is my morning pages.  I get exercise, fresh air, meditate and some really great ideas to write about.  I haven’t solved the worlds problems yet but I am working on it.  Try it, I highly recommend it!

http://www.theartistsway.com/

Tracy

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