Independently Together…


“In any relationship that’s important to you, between you and anyone else, there’s nothing quite like feeling truly connected. It’s awesome, isn’t it? Well in order for that feeling to manifest, it’s so incredibly important to allow for and embrace the distinctions that define each of you separately. The tendency is to do the opposite, to try to get on the same page about everything … but that’s not what your connection is about.”

It is a powerful feeling when you have that  connected with a friend, lover, parent or any other relationship we cultivate in life. When we don’t feel this connection the union feels fragmented, not whole. Connections need to be nurtured and time needs to be spent allowing the strength off the connection to grow. When we meet someone and form a bond of sorts whether it be a friendship or partnership along with that comes struggles, growth and learning, lots of learning about them and ourselves! It’s hard when we get married not to lose a part of our independence but I have always thought it was important to feel as though I was walking along side of my partner not attached as one. I wanted to keep my independence. The time I found this most difficult was after I had kids. I lost myself for a few years which lead to a feeling of disconnect, from myself and my partner.

I feel very strongly now in my life about holding on tight to who I am independently. I want to maintain that when I do decided to connect and bond with a man in my future. All I need to know is that he is exploring life along side of me, it’s okay if it’s slower or faster, zigging or zagging along the way. I want ‘him’ to be captivated by different things and show me what I wouldn’t have seen if I had been walking alone. When I need a hand or some encouraging words I wont need to look very far. (he doesn’t have to always be in the same room) We should both be able to be who we are independently while we are together. Independently together…

I love how my Postcards from Gusto reminds me of these wonderful things in life!

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Explore All Your Senses…

I see you ~ Have you ever met someone who sees you clearer than any other human being on the planet…including yourself.  It can be your best friend, parent, lover or partner. Seeing someones true self is a very intimate connection, that takes time. Not everyone is an open book or easily read which makes it harder, and not everyone is able or wants to expose their true self to others. Every now and then we meet that special person who sees right past our exterior to the juicy centre of who we truly are. When someone does see you for who you are, it makes you accountable to yourself. They become your second conscience. These unique human beings make us want to be better people.

I hear you ~ We all want our voice to be heard. In order to hear you must listen. Listening is the key to any good relationship in my eyes. Listening is learning and learning is what life is all about. Listen, learn, understand and accept the words you hear. Be open.

I feel you ~ When you open yourself to those around you, you become in-tune with their energy. Energy from a connection with another human being can be felt without even touching the surface of our skin. I feel you is more than physical.

Touching without words can be one of the most sensual forms of communicating. Human touch bonds us, heals us and releases endorphins more powerful than morphine. It can be a simple touch of the arm or a powerful embrace with someone we feel a strong connection to.

I taste you ~ Taste can be bitter, sweet, savoury or salty. Each of us has all those elements waiting to be shared.

I breathe you ~ Scent of the skin, a subtle fragrance, aromatherapy. Pheromones working their magic can be exhilarating. Each individual has their own unique scent that no other can replicate. The essence of who you are is within your skin.

Sixth sense ~ Intuition is what speaks to us when our other senses are clouded by circumstance…or life for that matter. Instinct can be so strong it can’t be ignored or just an whisper that brushes lightly by our skin. It’s the one thing in life you can trust if you open yourself to it.

We forget to open all of our senses to the world around us. If we do I think we experience life on an entirely different level. See, hear, feel, taste and breath in each day to live life to its fullest. 

 

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Who Chooses Who?


Did you chose or chase your partner? Do you think that the woman ultimately decides if a relationship is going to go any further? Men generally pursue women but not always. Some women know exactly what they want and go for it. Just like cats if you run away the game is on. Sometimes it’s just about the chase. Playing hard to get can intrigues the opposite sex but everyone has their limit to how much time or energy they will put into a chase. I’ve always thought getting someone was the easy part, it’s keeping them that challenges who we are.

Do men stay in a relationship when they know it’s not a ‘meet my mother’ kind of union just for the sex? Do women string men along while they wait for ‘Mr Pretty Damn Close to Perfect’ to walk through their door? I believe both sexes are guilty of misleading the other from time to time. Honest is always the best policy!

When you introduce someone to your friends and family you validate the relationship. You deem them worthy of joining your circle. There is nothing wrong with waiting to introduce your new guy or gal to your friends and family just to be sure. Keeping your status to yourself is probably a not a bad idea until you really know who you’re dating. We all know it takes awhile for some peoples ‘true colors to show.

It becomes pretty obvious when a relationship isn’t going further than a surface text-a-tion-ship which I’ve posted about before. It’s getting harder to differentiate the sincere from those who are just playing a game. Nobody keeps their word anymore. More often than not men and women just say what they think the opposite sex wants to hear. Stringing someone along has become second nature. Selfish behavior is rampant in the world of relationships…“what have you done for me lately” is a common attitude. Words have become diluted, faded and no longer said with meaning. Romance is becoming extinct. I do believe there’s a lots of great people out there you just have to be patient. It’s hard to find someone who hasn’t had their spirit broken when it comes to love, trust and honesty.

What women use to attract the male energy is the key to what they get. If they are simply using their sex appeal, they get a man who wants them for just that…sex. The signal or message sent out is read correctly and then women wonder why it didn’t amount to anything but a friend with benefits which is something I’ve yet to grasp. Act like a booty call and be happy with being his booty call. Pretty basic. Not that there is anything wrong with being a booty call as long as you have no expectation of ‘it’ becoming anything but a booty call. You just need to be honest with yourself about what you want.

Women sometimes allow their ego to get in the way and cloud their judgment taking the easy route by using what works, sexual manipulation. It doesn’t get you very far in the end. Being in touch with your sexuality is a great part of being human but balance is important if you want a relationship to develop into something other than a once a week romp in the hay! Chemistry is one thing but shouldn’t be confused with sexual energy which usually just leads to empty sex. For men sex is physical, for women it’s more emotional…most of the time. Not that there is anything wrong with empty sex if that’s what both parties involved are okay with. That’s where honesty is crucial.

Being able to identify when he’s just not that into you is easy if you ignore what he says and watch what he does, actions speak louder than words. Pretty simple if you actually listen to your instincts.

So when you are ready to choose or chase make sure you know exactly what you want and then take it slow. One thing I do know for sure is that if someone treats you like an option, don’t make them your priority their not worth it.

Regardless of who chooses who if the right person enters into your circle and the timing is right, you will be meeting the family…be careful what you wish for.

 

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In Search of the Elusive Soulmate ~

Women are hard wired to find love, some of us crave it like we crave dark chocolate, and why not because love is D-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s! We are forever on a quest for romance. We are drawn to the intoxicating fumes our elusive lover exudes, as he invisibly drifts by. When we do connect we are completely mesmerized by the chemistry that is created when we touch. When in search of the elusive soulmate it’s important to visualize exactly how you want him to make you feel.

I am reading a new book right now and in it there is a chapter about attracting your soulmate. Before you’re ready to cross paths with this energy whether it be male or female you have to put your order in, the more specific the better. I don’t need male energy in my life but I definitely want it. The search for the elusive soulmate is no different from any other journey we set out on. It’s important to smell the pheromones along the way!

I joked about my journey last month and wrote a post called Eat Eat Eat Pray Love , (got caught up in the eat part a little longer than I had planned lol) I am ecstatic to say I’ve moved forward and feel like I am now on the Pray part, my ass thanks me!

According to the book I’m reading you don’t just have one soulmate. What a massive relief that was to hear! The book is, and don’t laugh unless you’ve read it cover to cover, “The Idiot’s Guide Connecting with Your Angels” I don’t know why I think any of you would laugh because it’s a great book, maybe it’s the Idiot’s Guide part that sounds weird. I walked into Indigo books, and was lead right to it like it was calling out my name, so I had to buy it! I also bought “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Chakras“, and have “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Toltec Wisdom“, are you seeing a pattern here! Either 1) I’m a complete idiot or 2) I love the format of these books because of their reference style qualities and I’m intrigued! Pick one and get the books, you will see what I mean! (I’ve added a link so you don’t have to search for them 🙂 Just click on the picture of the book that is speaking to the idiot in you!)

According to The Idiot’s Guide to Connecting with Your Angels’ to help initiate finding your soulmate you should start by asking your angels to help you on your journey. Then, buy a journal that you’re ‘drawn’ to, think of the qualities you want your soulmate to possess, write one quality on each page, concentrate and read each one three times, ask the angels to fill your wish, trust and believe in divine timing and let it go, oh and don’t forget to thank your angels!

I was going to put my list of qualities I hope he possesses but I am not sure if there is enough room! 🙂 But I will give you a few examples of what’s important to me ~ passionate about me and his work (in that order), great sense of humour, smiling eyes, inner strength and incredible sexual chemistry! Don’t knock it till ya try it!

I found this beautiful silk artwork while looking for a picture to add to my post, it’s called ‘Soulmates’ by Artist Lena Reznikova, I had to add it!

Click on the book that piques your interest!

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