Can I Start Again?

Have you ever wanted to start over because you screwed something up? I think it’s perfectly legal to ask if you can start again. We did it as kids while playing, we’d begin something and if it didn’t go as planned we’d ask if we could start over. When taking pen to paper to write a love letter, in the days of real romance, we crumpled up what wasn’t just right and started from scratch, several times! How many love letters were lost because of imperfection? How many moments were given away because of the fear of being imperfect? Think about it, your first kiss, riding your bike, making love, drawing a picture. Nothing is done perfectly to start, really close maybe, but not perfect in the real world. It gives us something to strive for. When we say, ‘it just doesn’t get any better than this’, if you really think about it, it can always get better. But what determines better? Stuff? Time? Energy of the moment?

Now that we have texting and email we just press delete and our mistakes are wiped away into thin air, never to be seen in their unperfected state. Sad don’t you think. All those mistakes gone to waste. We learn from mistakes.

Lets take this a little further, do you ever wish you could do the same with life. Look around right now at who or what is in your space and imagine for a moment that you could delete the mistakes you’ve made with a press of the a button, and start again. 🙂 If this was possible, would you? If you did, you wouldn’t be who you are today. You would be perfect! Can you imagine meeting someone perfect? It would be like a writer having only final drafts, no works in progress, nothing to improve upon. It would never work! Nobody’s perfect! We need imperfection in our lives to create balance. It would be really easy but the end result would be no feeling of accomplishment. I don’t like a bunch of loose ends in my life either, I like to have things tied up or at least comfortably undone. I love all the flaws and character traits someone of the opposite sex has to offer, it makes them more interesting. Its part of the story of their life.

I told Scott of my idea for this post and he took it even further. What if we could run our lives with the buttons on our keyboard. I mentioned earlier Delete, but maybe delete is too strong to start, perhaps we could first Backspace a little and re-do a moment we wish we had done differently and then decide if it was delete worthy. Esc, who hasn’t wanted to escape from a moment or two or three! Control, you have it when you press the button. Enter/Return to a moment in your past, just pick one 🙂 Options, a pop down menu comes up and gives you options to pick from depending on the scenario. Volume, now were talkin, no explanation needed on this one! Fn,(function) cause sometimes we just need a little help doing it.

Would you have married the guy standing in the door frame looking at you, or have bought the desk you’re sitting at just because it was on sale. Maybe the room you’re sitting in wouldn’t be a colour you’ve learnt to live with? You might have held eye contact just a little longer with the guy at the coffee shop. Talked to the elderly women a moment longer before she crossed the street. I don’t think there is any particular moment I would delete in my life, but I would go back to several and not rush through them so quickly. I would enjoy every intoxicating moment. I wouldn’t walk away from a kiss that touched my soul because of time or circumstance. I would try to remain in the moment as long as it allowed.

I don’t think starting over is the way to go, although it sounds easy to just ‘delete’. Accepting the choices we’ve made along the way and not taking the easy way out must have some positive force in our lives, don’t you think? You have to live with no regrets and if you make mistakes along the way accept them as part of what made you who you are and focus on what really matters. At least you started…

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Would You, Should You, Could You Internet Date?

Is it really that hard to meet someone? I’ve been unattached for a year and a half and have had Internet Dating Services come up in conversations with friends more than a few times.   😉

Here is my take on my first impression of a few: Plenty of fish is one that keeps coming up but seriously the name, when I think of fish I think of throwing them back, they’re wet, cold, scaly and not the nicest of smells out there, it’s just weird. eHarmony, their ads just seem too good to be true and you know what they say about that! There is Crazy dates, they actually have written “Meet the Crazy Bitch here” in their ad, I feel regret just thinking about that one! There is Sugar Daddies where the classy, attractive and affluent can meet, whose your daddy, ahhhh no. The last one that caught my eye was Its Just Lunch Vancouver for busy professionals, they do all the work for you, you just show up and have lunch, brunch or drinks, no pressure! Are you kidding, isn’t the anticipation or moment before you get asked out the BEST PART of meeting someone new, other than kissing for the first time? I don’t get it, it shouldn’t be WORK, they should say,“we take all the pleasure out of it for you!”


Seriously, I just don’t feel right about someone else planning a date for me. Its like someone picking out an outfit in a clothing store who doesn’t have a clue what your style is, even when you tell them what you like, if they can’t find it they start suggesting other options. I was looking for a Jeep years ago and a car salesmen actually called me and said he didn’t have a new black Jeep available but he did have a 1985 white pick-up truck. WTF is that? That’s what I would be afraid of, do they push the guys who aren’t moving very quick and have an expiry date on them like old bananas in the produce department? If I worked there I would set up joke dates until I was fired just for laughs. It feels creepy and desperate to me, but never say never, right? Not likely for this chick!

I don’t get out much so I see the point, if someone doesn’t walk or drive by between 9 am and 9:05 am while I am sitting having a quick gulp of coffee on my front steps, or knows my walking route and lays on the horn so I can hear them over my blasting ipod, it’s just not likely to happen while doing my daily activities. I guess there’s kid sports but I am there watching the sport not scanning the audience of parents looking for a potential date *cough*, okay if Carri’s there I do, cause that’s just fun.

I am on the computer for a healthy part of the day so it does make sense as a place to meet someone, a common interest, but I am at home in my office and I am a little old fashioned when it comes to meeting people and rely on Chemistry to guide me. I’m not too worried about it to be honest, I am just living my life, doing my thing and if someone catches my attention I will take it one step at a time.

I was talking to a friends Mom across the street about dating and the internet and she agreed with me, we are going to leave it up to fate. We both love our independence. I find that those who are in a relationship think those who aren’t are lonely, we are not lonely, we are alone and there is a difference! The way I look at it is that if someone isn’t in my circle of doings and I need to meet them on the internet because we are so damn busy, that option isn’t looking good. I know I have to make a conscious effort to get out and will when the time is right but for now the internet for me is about surfing for ideas not guys or potential dates or mates. What do you think? Would you sign up for dating through the internet, or leave it up to fate? Have you met anyone online and had it work out? Let me know what’s worked for you? I really am interested to hear what’s worked for those who are navigating the dating field.

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