I always loved my Mom’s advice on a variety of different issues. She was always so brutally honest and even shocked the likes of me on occasion. She was and still is a very strong, open minded, independent woman. I quite often took her advice and was glad I had the sense to do so. ‘Quite often’ being the prominent words in that sentence. She just always seemed to know, as most Mom’s do.
I can admit now that on more than one occasion I didn’t take her advice and had to learn the hard way through my own experience and mistakes. I don’t believe there is a single soul out there who has not ignored the advice offered to them on at least one occasion. You have to keep in mind as a parent that life is about experience and we learn by mistakes.
I hear my mothers advice resonating through my voice at times, which is not a bad thing. We forget that our Mom’s have had far more life experience than most of us put together and have had similar experiences we are having. The only difference being is that their generation kept things to themselves unlike ours which likes to talk in such graphic detail. But regardless of the generation gap we all think we have, if you do sit down and have those heart to hearts with your Mom you soon realize that life today is very much like it was for them years ago. You just need to keep communicating and eventually Mom’s let out a secret or two. Or as my Mom would say some ‘history’. Scotch usually speeds up the process.
As I watch my daughter grow up, I ask myself if I could give her just one piece of advice that, cross my fingers, she would take, what would it be? My Nana’s advice to me was ‘treat em rough and tell em nothing’, now there’s a very strong independent woman of her time. I know she is looking up at me with a smile, I say up because after my Nana passed away of natural causes my daughter at the age of 5 asked me if Nana was looking up at us. You gotta love that! They say kids have a sixth sense so we will go with Nana in Hellvin ( this is a place somewhere in between heaven and hell) My Mom’s advice was ’start out the way you mean to end’. Pretty basic really, just be yourself.
I had a great job in the film and television industry but always knew I wanted a family and I wasn’t going to rely on anyone else to raise my kids. My choice to be a stay at home Mom was one I never regretted but now looking back I wish I had kept something that was just for me. As much as I enjoyed every moment, well honestly not every moment, there were days I would have sold both kids real cheap but I wish I had not lost myself in the process of motherhood as many of us do.
So my advice to my growing, strong, quirky, independent daughter is this. To never lose sight of your dreams no matter how big or small they are, nurture your friendships as you do your family because without them we loose our inspiration, and always maintain your financial independence so that you feel strong, independent and capable to walk alone if you so choose.