40 Second Rant

We all need to rant every now and then. I like that More magazine (you know, the magazine “For Grown-up Women with Smarts|Spirit|Style”) features a 40 second rant in their issues. I think 40 seconds is the perfect amount of time to rant too. Any longer and you cross into whine territory and that’s just annoying. It’s not lost on me that the magazine is for over 40’s and they chose 40 seconds for the rant but I think we should draw the line there. No one wants to hear a 49 year old rant on and on for 49 seconds. That would just be too much!

Here is a rant from the Feb/March 2010 issue of More called Flex This!

My name is Sarah and I am a flexitarian. For those of you unfamiliar with the term (as I was until a marketing expert enlightened me), allow me: “Flexitarianism describes a way of eating that allows you to be a flexible vegetarian.” Yeah, that’s right — you can be a holier-than-thou, kale-and-quinoa-consuming veggie freak, who, from time to time, inhales prime rib. Awesome, yes? For the record, I’m also a fleximoralist who enjoys mocktails with my best frenemies. Authenticity is so overrated.

If I were going to offer a rant of my own at this time, it might be  about the joys of hot flashes and the consequential lack of sleep that accompany them and why I think men should all have to pass a whole cantaloupe at least once in their lives, but I’m not going to go down that path.  No I prefer to keep it light and humorous today, so  here are some more of Sarah Moore’s 40 second rants:

Have something you want to rant about?Leave it in the comments below, but remember, 40 seconds max!

 

 

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I Couldn’t Resist ‘Pink’ and Cosmo!

There I was this morning standing in the grocery line up buying snacks I could do without, when this months Cosmo cover caught my eye. I was instantly distracted like a child by something shiny. My inner voice said “oooooo Pink. I LOVE Alecia Beth Moore! She exudes self confidence. After watching her perform ‘Glitter in the Air’ at the Grammy’s I think she singlehandedly brought sexy to a new level! The audience watched in awe as Pinks holy water showered down on them. I don’t think one person cared if their designer outfit got sprayed because they were so caught up in the moment! I was blown away with her all-or-nothing risk taking personality! She NEVER lip syncs, doesn’t believe in it, she’s the real deal! Love this woman’s voice, so raw, sexy and powerful, yet sometimes she sounds so vulnerable. Her interview was awesome! She is continually pushing the envelope, sometimes she even opens it up and peeks inside!

I am getting off track, I bought Cosmo but admit I was a little embarrassed as I reached for it, I usually get More Magazine for Women in their 40’s because, well I am in my 40’s. Cosmo grabbed my attention first because of Pink and second because of the headlines of what was inside! I don’t know what I was thinking I haven’t got time to sit and lolly-gag reading Cosmo but I guess that’s why they market it like they do, for women like me who can’t help themselves! Seriously, I still haven’t read my subscription of Martha Stewart Magazine from 10 years ago. And I have a new one for Women’s Health I’ve yet to get through! Can anyone relate?

Here are the Headlines that even I couldn’t resist!

* 75 Sex Tips From Guys ( Sizzling, Sinful, and Surprising Things They’re Craving Now) ~  Can you say HOT, and there are 75 of them!

* Stuck in Neutral (Gutsy Little Moves That Will Make Your Life Awesome) ~ Basically start saying “Yes” when you would normally have said “No” Sounds like a plan to me! It’s always good to do something out of your ordinary. Get out of your comfort zone for even just a day!

* Girl Traits No Man Can Resist ~ Leave something to the imagination! Love this advice!

*Orgasm Guaranteed (This Simple Mind Trick Takes You From “Almost” There to There!)~ I’ll cut to the chase on this one, climaxing just by thinking! The mind is a powerful tool, so basically thinking about what color you want to change the bedroom to while your making whoopee with your significant other is NOT what you should be doing. If you actually think about what you are doing as apposed to what you will be doing at a later date (living in the moment) you will get you there a lot quicker. For most women climaxing without touch is difficult but worth a try if you ask me!

*100 Facts Your Gyno Should Have Told You ~ There was a lot of great info in this article, but nothing suitable for Tara, you will have to pick up a copy of Cosmo for this one!

When I buy a magazine I usually flip through it quick to see what’s inside, look at pictures, and then after I see what the content is I start to read the articles that grab my attention first. It’s been awhile since I have picked up a Cosmo (my twenties) but I have to say it definitely grabbed my attention and had interesting content to back it up! Mostly oriented around Sex but hey what’s wrong with that!

For those who would like to watch “Glitter in the Air” here you are…enjoy ~

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Lesbians – Like ’em or Loooove ’em

GirlsI have noticed an interesting phenomenon lately.  There was an article in O magazine about women leaving their men for other women.  Then Oprah did a whole show on the subject.  Then More magazine also did a story about the same subject.

What I found most interesting about these articles was that it seemed the women who were making the “switch” were all around my age (ok, I’ll just say it – 45).  Many had been happy with male partners for years but then fell in love with a woman.  They seemed to be as shocked as anyone else by the sudden change in preference.  And really it wasn’t a change in preference but more about the fact that they met a “person” that they fell in love with who happened to be the same gender as themselves.  This is the part that intrigues me.

I know there are a lot of girls that are bi-curious, (usually around college age though) and who experiment a little, but this is a different thing all together.  It feels to me like mainstream culture, in the western world anyway, is beginning to relax it’s love of labels and be more accepting of different choices.  It’s starting to feel like people are getting that it’s ok to love and be loved by whomever.

I have some very dear girl friends who are gay and who struggled with terrible fear about “coming out of the closet”.  They were afraid of so many things;  upsetting their families, being shunned by their church, etc.  This always saddened me.  Personally, I don’t understand how others feel they can label and judge according to someone’s sexual preference.  When they finally did “come out”  they were fortunate to have loving families and friends that supported them but I know this isn’t always the case.

Perhaps the reason some women my age are going this route is due to the fact that they’re finally really comfortable with who they are and are simply open to love, any kind of love, and if it comes from another woman, well, that’s just fine.  And when you really think about it, humanity doesn’t need us to be increasing our population as much as it needs more love.  Love in any form can’t be wrong.  Do you agree?

Bonnie

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Photo Shoots for 40+ Year Olds

I just finished reading my April 2009 issue of More magazine.  I love More magazine because it is for women of my age.  I can relate to almost every article and nearly every advertisement.  Last Christmas my husband (I mean Santa) put an issue of Cosmopolitan in my stocking.  “Cosmo!” I thought, “I haven’t read one of these in years.  This should be fun.”  Well I tried, I really did, but there was absolutely nothing in there that I found interesting.  The articles were all about how to “catch” a man and then how to satisfy him in bed.  Check and check (if I do say so myself!).  It was for twenty somethings and it was fun when I was at that stage but pretty empty for me at this age.

More magazines 2007 40+ model search

More magazines 2007 40+ model search

This months More magazine features the winner and four runners up for their annual “More 40+ Model Search”.  The winners range in age from 41 to 52 and these women are absolutely gorgeous but the best part is that they are non model, every day kind of women…only really quite stunning to look at.  The magazine shows them getting primped for their photo shoots by the hair and make-up people.  Of course they are wearing designer duds and have professionals seeing to lighting etc.

All of this made me think back to just a couple of weeks ago when I spent a few days with my partners so that we could do our own “Tara Cronica” photo shoot.  The first one in many I hope.  Ha! I never thought I’d ever say that because I’m not really a fan of having my picture taken, but we just had so much fun that day and shared so many laughs.  The most fun however, came when we three sat shoulder to shoulder peering into my lap top to view the 400 plus pictures that were taken of us that day.  My cheeks were sore from laughing so hard by the time we finished.  That’s not to say there weren’t some fine photos of all of us, but I have to tell you there were some pretty unusable ones too.  It was then that I learned that I must never ever ever lower my chin to my chest when I smile.  I had never before realized how many chins I was sporting!  Each one of us at different times had some pretty unflattering poses.  Phew! It’s not just me!  I have to admit I was a bit worried going in because I have never been a model and both my partners have modeled at different times in their lives – and really good at it!

What I learned from the whole experience (besides the too many chins part) is that I’m finally comfortable in my own skin no matter how wrinkled and saggy it has become.  I am what I am and I’m happy to be “me” now.  I think  my partners are like me in this way too and that is why we could have so much fun with it.  Sooooo, I thought you might like to share in some of the laughs.   I can hear Tracy and Jacquie gasping “Oh no…you wouldn’t!”  Not to worry girls, I’m just laughing at myself here.  Although I have some good ones for future blackmail…just kidding!  Enjoy the out takes now cause you won’t be seeing them again.

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Bonnie

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