Peer Pressure

peer pressureSchools Back and with that comes Peer Pressure!  When I think about the youth of the world I can’t help but think of those two words.

I was at a local track meet before summer and was inspired watching the athletes compete.  The look on their faces when they approached the finish line was what I enjoyed the most.  Such determination in each one of them.  All their hard work and discipline paid off.

During the track meet a group of 50-60 kids from the local high school walked across the field like they owned it while events were taking place. They headed for center field like it was their arena they were denied.  As they passed by all the parents, we heard them saying how excited they were to have come to watch a fight.  The mob quickly circled around a couple of guys who were about to be center stage when the principal and another teacher quickly diffused the situation.  Kudos’ to both of them for taking charge of such an enormous group of kids.  Unfortunately sometimes there is not always an adult near by to stop this kind of potential life changing mistake.  Young guys get all fired up and can’t control their hormones, they get lost in the moment, and because of peer pressure they lose complete control.

Some kids just haven’t got the confidence to make choices that will prevent the pressure from getting the better of them.  This lack of confidence can lead them into a compromising situation that they are not equipped to deal with, which could potentially change their life.

I think peer pressure is the underlying reason for most altercations between young guys or boys.  I believe fighting should be for one purpose and one purpose only, self defense.  My Dad trained for years in Kyokushin Karate (full contact karate), Scott achieved his Black belt through discipline and hard work and Bonnie and I trained in kickboxing together for several years, so I have a long history of being around controlled sparring.  Confidence is a very empowering feeling.  At some point in your life you may need to fight, it’s important to know how to protect yourself, but fighting today is not what it used to be.  The fight you participate in today may be the end of your life two weeks later because of retaliation.

Why has it become acceptable to stand by and watch?  If no one watched, the behavior would simply not happen.  My Dad gave me advice as a teen that always stayed with me, even today.  “If you are ever somewhere you don’t want to be, or someone makes you feel uncomfortable, leave!” It’s basically another way to use your voice. Walking away makes a statement too.

I think as parents we need to take some responsibility in the actions of our kids.  We need to know where are kids are and who they spend time with.  They need to know that they matter and that they can talk to us about absolutely anything.  Communication is key in keeping our kids safe and out of harms way.  Sometimes we let our kids down when they really need us.  We are there for them throughout elementary school but just drop them at the doors of high school and assume they don’t need us anymore, when in fact they need us even more.  We need to be there for our kids especially when they are trying to find their place in life.

If you would like more information on how to deal with peer pressure visit the link below.

Dealing with Peer PressureTracy

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Here’s One Thing You Probably Don’t Know About Me

Bonnie Johnson's Post

Bonnie’s Take~

Apparently my partners are struggling to come up with something to write for this post.  I, on the other hand, have a number of options to go with.  Hmmm.  I wonder what that says about me.

I’ve decided to share my fire walking experience.  Yes, that’s right, I am one of those freaks who willingly walked on white hot coals for about 20 feet.  Why would anyone even want to do that you ask?  It began for me when I decided to enter a martial arts contest and I really wanted to win.  I was training with a variety of people for this particular bout.  One of the guys I trained with told me that if I went to the “fire walking” course and successfully walked on the hot coals I would be guaranteed to win my bout.  He said that once you have accomplished that feat there is nothing you feel you cannot do.  It’s a huge boost to your confidence.

I was just fascinated by the thought of learning to control my mind to the point that I could actually be able to have my physical body perform this amazing act.  I signed up for the full day course.  It was many years ago now but I remember that I enjoyed the experience immensely.  Looking back on my notes I wrote 3 things that I hoped to accomplish that day:   1.  Build confidence   2.  Overcome Fears   3.  Become the Best I Can Be In Any Endeavor.   I also see in my notes that it was important to me to prove to my young son that anyone can accomplish whatever they put their mind to.

I remember the main focus of the day was to obtain a peak state of energy.  I did, and at the end of the course the coals were white hot and waiting for us to prove we could “walk the walk”.  When it was my turn to step on to the coals I hesitated with doubt for a moment.  My mind was screaming “are you crazy!?”  So I jumped off.  Disappointed that I had failed I suddenly thought “NO! You can do this!”  I stepped back on with determination like I’d never known before and slowly walked the entire 20 feet.  When it was over I put my socks and shoes back on without looking at the soles of my feet.  I drove the 2 hour long drive home wondering if I had actually really done this crazy act.  Were my soles burnt and blistered?  When I got home I gingerly took off my shoes and socks and examined my feet.  Not a blister, not a mark.  I had done it!  I felt like I was invincible.  A few days later I had my martial arts contest and won my division.  The power of the mind is an amazing thing.

TracyTracy’s Two Cents~

I have to admit this topic was a lot harder than I thought it would be.  Although I am a very private person when it comes to how I spend my time, I think I am also a very open person when it comes to sharing my life through thought and opinion especially now with Tara Cronica.

The one subject that I have yet to address is my religious beliefs.  I think this is one of the very few things people don’t know about me.  I would describe myself as a very Spiritual person.  I find interesting aspects of many different religions such as Buddhism, Taoism, Hinduism, African Traditional Religion, Wiccan Beliefs to name a few.  I believe in life after death, reincarnation.  I believe in Karma.  I believe we all come from an energy source.  We all have a destiny or life path that we follow to learn the lessons that we as individual souls need to learn in our time here on earth.  I believe we meet for a reason.

Religion is such a wide topic to cover which is why I have yet to explore it here on Tara Cronica.  I try to live by ‘The Golden Rule’  “Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them  Do Unto You”.  But I am far from perfect.  It’s pretty basic really.  I believe it doesn’t matter what religion you follow, whether it be one or many, but that you are living your life authentically being aware of others and being true to self.  I look forward to writing a more in depth post of what I specifically like about different religions or religious beliefs that I personally find interesting.   Great topic Bonnie it really got my mind thinking.  How about you Jake?

post-pic-4-11Jacquie’s response~

In 1981 I auditioned for my first ever film role and landed it after about 5 call backs.   I eventually turned the part down because it called for a little bit of nudity and at 16 I was slightly uncomfortable with that.  The movie starred Diane Lane and the Sex Pistols as well as a very young Laura Dern.  It was released on the indie and festival circuit as Ladies and Gentlemen, The Fabulous Stains and has enjoyed a cult following ever since, I’ve been told.  Could’ve been my big break.  Apparently Daryl Hannah was originally offered my role but she turned it down as well, so I’m in good company.

I watched it for the first time last night on some cable channel and I also TiVoed it in case one of my kids is interested to see what their mom might have been if she’d had the guts to pursue her dreams instead of worrying what the rest of the world would think.   I have to laugh it’s so bad!  Courtney Love bad!  Train wreck bad.  So bad it’s good… in an ‘I’m-having-a-mid-life-crisis-why-can’t-I-turn-back-the-hands-of-time’ kinda way.   If I had a do-over I’d take it.  And now you know…

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