Truth Be Told ~

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The truth can crack your heart forever, it can also set you free. A double edged sword for sure. It can surprise us like watching Bambi vs Godzilla for the first time! You can’t change what you don’t know. It can be refreshing and hard to hear all at the same time.

I love the male energy as you all know. I have lots of male friends and love each and every one of them because they speak the truth. Men in general are uncomplicated creatures. Women on the other hand, can make the simplest thing the most elaborate undertaking. <~~~~ me included…apparently ((((smile)))

Complication seeps in when we over think things, in my opinion. If we can stay in the moment and follow our heart and live lean we have less to worry about which releases the complicated factors. Back to basics. When I just go where the wind blows me I don’t seem to have a care in the world and life just seems to happen. Somewhere along the line I lost my carefree self. I come back for visits now and then but never seemed to unpack my bag for long. Now I can’t even find the bag, maybe that’s the problem, there was no bag to find!

We have learned over time to add layers to our truth complicating it each time and so it’s sometimes difficult to peel them off and see what really lies deep beneath our coat of social acceptance and behaviours. I find the truth to be an incredibly attractive quality, even when the words are not what I hoped to hear. A person who can speak the truth is allowing things to just flow as they should, not worrying about time lines or selfish needs. When did I stop just going with the flow? When did I stop saying in a southern drawl “Well whyyyyy not!”

Words spoken from the heart are raw and untouched not influenced by the beliefs of society. They are unique to who releases them and those who embrace them. I have faced many truths in the last 5 year that have lead me to find out more about who I am. Just when I thought I figured out who I was becoming another truth is gently handed to me. Sometimes we meet kind souls who take chances in exposing the underlying realities of who we are, that we don’t see in the mirror. If we are ready to hear the words we can move a step closer to having a quiet mind. The questions cease, our inner dialogue starts to whisper and we find ourselves more open and willing to see what needs to change. We become free. There is nothing purer than simple freedom. Freedom within ourselves.

I was handed a gentle truth and for the most part I didn’t want to hear it, but I did. I looked within myself and accepted it as a gift. I processed it and agreed for the most part that I needed to hear it. I asked a question and was given an honest answer.

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And wisdom to know the difference.”

Thank you for those who are brave enough to tell the truth.

Tracy signiture

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Past Lives…part two.

Past Lives…part one. (last weeks post)

Past Lives…part two.

I felt a tear slowly forge a path down my cheek as her hypnotic voice asked me to move forward in time once again. I didn’t want to move forward, I wasn’t ready to face my fear. I kept looking back, drawn to my past, to him. I grabbed onto a thought that would make my heart beat again. With every ounce of my subconscious strength I held onto the energy of the man who captured my heart. I felt alive again.

He walked toward me, glistening with sweat from working hard in the field. His walk commanded my attention, taking my breath away. In slow motion his strong hands reached out and cupped my jaw on both sides slowly bringing me close enough to feel his breath on my mouth. He stared deep into my soul, taking me to a place I had never been with any man before. Like a tornado he stirred every emotion in my body spinning me out of control with no conscious thought. He had such passion and want in his eyes. Nothing could break through the spiritual connection we were creating in that moment. I would remembered it for eternity.

I heard her soft guiding voice in the distance, muffled like I was hearing it through the wall. She kept repeating the same words over and over. I was lost in my story not wanting to come back up the spiral staircase to reality…she gently repeated “You need to move on, if you don’t you won’t find the answer you are looking for”.

I hesitantly moved forward in time and found myself standing in a familiar spot. I looked towards the tree up on the hill where our son was sitting quietly looking into the vibrant green canopy of leaves that were ready to burst with new life. It was spring again, my favourite season. The breeze was cool this time, fresh subtle fragrance filled the air. The birds were oddly quiet as if they knew what was about to come…

The distant rumble was clearer than any other time. I was waiting for it, anticipated it. I sensed the moment my eyes opened that morning that this was the day. I walked as if in a procession to greet the gentleman who had brought my letters of love in the past. He couldn’t hide his emotions. His eyes told me my heart was about to be shattered into a million pieces. He surely would not have wanted to be the one to deliver this letter, I was thankful it was he who did.

I stoically held my head high as he softly placed the letter in my hand. I closed my eyes to recalled his scent so he could stand next to me and give me his strength. His energy was not within the folded corners. My nose touched the unfamiliar penmanship. His scent, absent. There was nothing. As the tears rolled down my cheeks I opened the handwritten letter to face my biggest fear. I saw words such as brave, strength, respected, sincerely, hero and then I heard his voice faintly whisper the word s-o-r-r-y into my ear.

Our son stood behind me silently with tears flowing down his flush cheeks. We stood with arms wrapped tight around one another, not a word was said. We were all we had left. I felt the presence of his strength circle us as we sobbed silently. I was grateful in that moment to have him in my arms with the same blood pumping through his veins as his father. He would be my forever now.

 

 

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Movember ~ Making a Difference in Mens Health ~ Repost ;{

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We love the strength of our male energy. They protect us instinctively without even thinking about it. They stand tall when looked upon to hold us together. They dissipate our fears, and lessen our pain by just being present.

Even the strongest of men can have their fate challenged, leaving those they love wishing for even just one moment longer to be held in their arms.

Movember, changing the face of mens health with a ribbon on their upper lip, worn with pride, uniting men in all corners of the globe.

These men share a camaraderie, their list of commonalities are long, but what matters most is their health! Male energy bound together to show their support for those who have, are, and will, fight a battle they all set out to win. Sadly not all do, but by bringing awareness to this crucially important cause we can get through this together.

We have all been touched by the loss of great men, whether it be within our family, our circle of friends, or a co-worker. We have all known someone who has lost their fight and joined the world of Angels. The world must be in need of Angels…

~ Last year the world lost an amazing man by the name of Brock Hilliard. I am grateful to have called him my friend. He is missed each day by all those who crossed his path and felt his love.

~ My friend Rick Rae (Rickr) passed last week and left the world with one less positive difference makers. Rick supported and left his voice on Tara Cronica for many years! He inspired me on more than one occasion to keep going! And still does. I miss the simple : ) Rick left so often reminding me that I was thought of. I miss being called ‘kid’.

~ Ken Yamamoto, a supportive father, a loving husband and friend, lost his fight just days ago. He will be missed by a community who he shared time and space with watching great kids play hockey, lacrosse and music!

~ Wray Douglas, I have so many fond memories when I think of Wray. Thank you for always keeping us safe on set while you lived your dream. I am grateful for the selfless gift you gave without pause. My love and thoughts are with your family.

Just a few of the great men who made a difference in the lives of those they loved, may you all rest in peace.

So although I admit I love watching the progression of a great Mo, it’s deeper than that for me this year. There is no comical twist, just a blessing that there are individuals who step up to create change in the world…for that I am grateful.

So gentlemen, grow your Mo and wear it with pride and honour knowing you have taken a stand to make a difference!

Made_in_Movember_Icon_1Tracy ~

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Challenge Me…

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What makes certain men feel the need to challenge the words or actions of the woman they find attractive? It would be so much easier to just go with the flow and agree, let them have their way! If men would simply give us what we want, life would be so much simpler for them…wouldn’t it? I am pretty sure there is a label for that.

Thankfully there are men out there who beg to differ. These intellectuals won’t allow any woman to manipulate their minds, regardless of how well she has learned to bat those lashes. It goes against every cell in their body to let anything slide for the sake of an easy ride. These men feel the need to peel away our layers, exposing our intimate thoughts, leaving us standing naked feeling vulnerable. They want to know what we have deep inside.

When I was much younger I was always attracted to the energy in the crowd who paid little attention to me, a youthful challenge. It was the chase that was the exciting part back then. As I’ve aged and become wiser, a challenge still stimulates my senses but it’s definitely no longer about the chase. It’s about playing for keeps! Whether or not I am challenged intellectually is what keeps me wanting more. Stimulate my mind and my heart will follow.

Every now and then we meet our match. These male energies make us think about what comes gushing out of our mouths. They question who we are, how our brain works and why we believe in certain things. They are not afraid to ask the question and expect an answer. These men make us grow and unfold, evolving within our own existence! They’re not your regular Saturday Night Special! They stand alone and are willing to put it on the table if asked. They have no fear. These men are the risk takers, the seekers of something special. They are willing to go the distance. They want more from us than we are usually willing to give. They are the ones who ruffle our feathers from time to time and make us re-evaluate what we stand for. They know how to encourage us to reach higher.

A man who can make you re-evaluate your doings or simply your words, is a man who isn’t afraid to stand by your side when life gets messy. We all need to be challenged in our lives to reach beyond what we have found comfort in.

Challenge me…

Tracy ~

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Facial Hair is Sexy…

There is no better place to find yourself than the world our distracted minds naturally send us. Deep inside the imagination of a sexy mind lies the vivid dreams and fantasies of what a single thought can do. This time the thought that scaled the walls of my subconscious was that of pheromone filled facial hair.

The male energy who adorns a ribbon across his lip is making a statement we have all become aware of, Movember is fast approaching. He is willing to take a stand, go the distance, be uncomfortable and show the world he wants to be here. He is strong and masculine. Male energy with a purpose greater than himself.

There are those who wear a little more than a ribbon on their lip all year long. It’s an expression of who they are or where they’ve been. Facial hair is soft, rugged, manly. It has natural pheromones that pull us in. It can be abrasive if rubbed the wrong way but soft and gentle if stroked in the right direction. It shouts testosterone. It’s a choice, unique to the one who wears it, a right of passage even.

And it goes like this…

My eyes were closed, lost in my subconscious thought. I had goose bumps rising like waves on the surface of my skin from head to toe in anticipation of what was to come. The world went silent around me as I felt his very first touch. His lips did not arrive first to my skin. The soft warm tickle from his beard came first. He paused, searching it seemed for the perfect place to kiss. His facial hair brushed my skin gently as he continued exploring the map of my body. Every hair follicle across the surface of my canvas yearned for his touch. His breathe warmed the surface of my skin as he continued until he found his favourite spot.

Facial hair is sexy…

~ Tracy

 

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Let the Wind Blow ~

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IMG_5074I have questions!

What attracts you to the opposite sex when you first meet? Initially in person, it’s a physical attraction. It may be the way a man carries himself, how he interacts with someone in a crowd or his voice heard in a line up that piques our interest. It can be the look in a mans eyes that captures our attention. There are so many unique elements that makes us look, but what makes us want to talk? Is it as simple as the desire for human contact or is it a specific connection we seek? What are you looking for? <~~~~that’s the million dollar question in my world!

Attraction online it’s much different, conversation connects us. We read the words of another and get captured by how they express themselves. We view a still photograph and start trying to visualize the person in the flesh. Is it even safe to meet someone you have no mutual social connection with? Do you even think about that or do you just jump in and hope for the best? Is it better to get to know someone via email before you stand before one another, or does that make it harder?

What makes you want to take that ominous step forward to putting yourself in the same room with someone you meet serendipitously or online?

Next step…

What is their Intention? Do you think that’s a question that should be asked when you meet someone? Or should you just go with the flow and see where the wind blows the two of you? I have done both. Honesty is always best. I don’t think men or women naturally like to expose their true intentions out of fear, fear of being rejected or judged. As humans we don’t like either, but without risk we gain nothing and don’t grow and unfold.

I never used to think about what someones intentions were but it has been on my mind more lately. Living and learning is what life is all about isn’t it? Isn’t it? Taking chances? Opening your heart? Sharing, loving, living with inner peace and harmony. <~~~~ that’s just the hippy in me talking now, Captain Careful will rear her ugly head again and set her straight! Life is meant to be shared isn’t it? Maybe it’s hormones? Maybe I’m just tired and need a good sleep? Of Course I need a good sleep…but maybe…maybe it’s just me.

Inner voice “What does your heart tell you little grass-hopper?”

Other Inner voice ~ flips inner voice #1 the bird...conversation ends, again!

I think that whenever we have inner conflict or questions we need to take the time to express them, chew on them awhile and then just let them go, let the breeze blow them back to where they came from and just be…

Today I am just being…and I am grateful for the breeze blowing because I had ALOT to carry away!

Tracy signiture

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Expose Yourself

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625565_10151296502307032_1928783634_nBonnie exposed herself last week…don’t rush and click the link to see a naked picture of her, I mean emotionally.

Women tend to share their fears and insecurities with other women, which takes courage and confidence. You take the chance of being judged. Occasionally we meet a man with whom we feel this comfort and we have the best of both worlds. Men on the other hand don’t share quite as easily with their mates as the female energy does. Men are brought up to be manly which unfortunately in society eyes doesn’t always include the expression of emotions. I want a man who can chop wood AND express his thoughts, desires, love, dreams, fears and insecurities <—–to be clear that is not my whole list of what I want my man to be 😉 There is nothing more liberating than being with someone you can say anything to regardless of how intimate or wildly crazy it may seem. When we feel safe, we share. When we share we build trust. Without trust we have nothing.

True raw emotions I believe should be shared. I am guilty of being too much of an open book at times, so balance is important. I am working on keeping my inner feelings to myself a tad longer, just in case they are hormone based shooting out of left field without any prior notice what-so-ever. It’s a struggle let me tell you! I wouldn’t be in some of the predicaments I find myself in if I kept my trap shut a little longer! Live and learn.

However…Our truth is who we are, like it or leave it. When we cease to share who we are, we stand still. It’s super safe…but a bit boring! We miss out on intimacy and moments that will allow us to grow with or without a partner. When we take a chance, the reward can be simply delicious! This is where balance comes in. Keeping a little bit of yourself for a rainy day kinda logic by balancing our truth and living in the moment pure and raw. It doesn’t matter how honest you want to be, sometimes it’s best to keep that thought close to your heart, even for a nanosecond longer before diving face first for that muddy landslide of fun and adventure. <~~~ You have to admit that sounds wayyyyy better than being in the safety zone! So Captain Careful (that’s me) suggests wearing safety goggles before you dive? Excuse me while I go shower off the mud on my face!

When I was in my twenties I wasn’t able to communicate well (go figure!) out of fear of being judged or left for that matter, so I didn’t say much of anything. Sadly in the end the relationship ended because I didn’t communicate, so holding back my words gave me the same result. Fear and insecurities come from a place when we are learning about life and who we are. They sit stagnant within our DNA waiting for a opportunity to expose themselves if we let them. I have worked hard on learning how to communicate well but every now and then I fear being judged and left and I raise my walls and stop communicating to avoid the inevitable! When you search back to the root or beginning of a fear we are able to face those fears and move on from them. “Fear is the Thief of Dreams” ~ Mahatma Gandhi

We all have insecurities and fears as Bonnie mentioned hers being the importance of what people think of her. Valid insecurity, we all want to be liked as human beings. We strive to be accepted and loved. Life is meant to be shared and no one wants to be left alone in life to fend for themselves forever! forever…forever…forever…forever.

I am in the process of facing a few fears of my own. What I have learned in the process is this…I am a survivor, I am able to take care of myself and family all by myself…if need be! I know I don’t have to, if I would just learn to use my words and ask for help when I need it. I am strong, independent, self sufficient and I can do it alone but I am far from alone! I have a huge circle of male and female energy that if I reached out to, would be there with strength and a smile willing to help me.

Sooooo, judge me not unless you have walked in my shoes. Leave me if you choose. I will stand amongst my circle of true companions and live my life in the moment the best way I know how! Knowing I can survive on your own is empowering, admitting I don’t want to is my truth.

Svaha ~

Tracy signiture

 

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Never say Never!


NEVER say NEVER! It seems that every time I do the Universe has a funny way of making me re-visit that particular ‘Never’ in order to understand it more clearly, with the end result usually being a learning experience. I like to think of myself as a non-judgemental person and I believe I am for the most part. Sometimes we need to experience things to decide what we want or don’t want. It’s a way of finding out what is most important to us and what we are willing to compromise on.

I have met some pretty awesome male energy over the past couple of years, some who were honest as soon as it was humanly possible, and some who took a little more time to release their truth. We all have different comfort zone that allow us to share our feelings, hopes, dreams and desires. Timing is key, as we are all on different paths going different places at different speeds. We can’t always control what leads us down a path, so we float a bit in the unknown to see where it flows, not knowing if it will lead us anywhere at all, and sometimes much to our surprise it does. We are simply testing the water, fishing so to speak. We are then forced to either come clean or lie. Most conscious human being come clean, being true to self.

How do you approach dating? Do you do your own thing in hopes of meeting Mr Funny-Pants serendipitously? Do you mingle in coffee shops with girlfriends hoping to catch a glance from Mr Potentially Almost Perfect while he sips his latte? Do you agree to blind dates? There are so many ways to meet people if that is what you want to do. You just need to get out from behind your computer screen and walk out your door…or not!

I wrote about online Dating and Dating in general several times…Do Vancouver Men Really Suck ( I think not), 24 Hours of Online Dating…for Research (perhaps I didn’t give it the ol’college try…because I didn’t go to college), Would You, Should You, Could You, Internet Date? (I cracked myself up with this one), Dating Etiquette (including my very own dating tips…wait for it! lol), Do we have time to ‘Date’ anymore? (clearly I wasn’t ready to date yet!) so it’s obviously something I have an opinion on. I joined a free online dating site which is what spawned my post ‘24 Hours of Online Dating…for Research’, to see what all the talk was about, I panicked and delete my account because I was bombarded with strangers wanting to instant message me. I hated it! I would NEVER do that again. NEVER! Yup I said it loud and clear!

After dating a few guys over the last couple of years I understand more clearly that everyone has baggage including me and timing is key. We are all doing the best we can, trying to balance our busy lives. We are not always 100% available, which inspired my post In search of the Elusive Available Male and Patience (I found patience!). I finally have patience! I decided to join a more reputable dating site to take yet another peek into the world in which I didn’t quite understand. It was with the intent to find out more about what type of person goes that route and does it really work? The skeptic in me was front and centre but my curiosity fought and won. I took a step out of my comfort zone to find my answers. There was a lot of ‘winking’ and emails with introductions that sounded genuine, with the odd scammer thrown in for discomfort.

Reading the online safely tips put things in perspective but when you think about it, being safe should always be your number one concern when meeting someone new. Communicating online makes sense for those who are busy professionals, if it’s done carefully! Online you don’t have body language and eye contact which are huge when it comes to intuition, and trusting your instincts. However you are able to save time by ‘doing your research’ on someone you find initially attractive. Online you save yourself the surface conversation finding out where they live, what they do, kids/no kids, hobbies, lifestyle and what they personally express that they are looking for. It’s much harder than it looks to write about who you are, what you believe in and what you are looking for in a partner. I was seriously impressed with how great these guys communicated through their bios.

I was told by my online friend that you really have to rely on your spidy senses and instinct. He takes his time with meeting in person and gets a feel for who he is communicating with first. He has had success twice with online relationships. When I relaxed and put my trust in my own intuition which by the way said he’s a good guy I took control and started talking. I found there were a good number of guys not sure if this avenue was for them either but they were willing to give it a try. I admired them for putting themselves out there. We are all looking for the same thing really, we want someone to share in our hopes and dreams, to laugh out loud with and smile at from across the room. Life is meant to be shared, when you are ready!

I am old fashioned and do believe meeting in the flesh is best…but that doesn’t always work. After I took a step back and opened my mind to something new I realized that as long as I am honest and authentic I have nothing to lose in what I choose to do. There will be those who don’t play by the rules or bend what is the norm and those who have a less favourable agenda, but that’s their choice. I relaxed and started talking to a few guys whose profiles really impressed me. I came to the conclusion that although it’s not really for me, or perhaps my first choice, there were so many great men who really knew exactly how to express themselves, conveying beautifully what they want and who they are.

I suppose if you really want something/someone you will make the time for it/them.

My only advice to any dating whether it be online or in the flesh is be honest right from the very first glance or hello. There is nothing better than knowing exactly where you stand with someone. You are allowed to take your time to figure things out. If they are meant to be yours, they will be there when you do! Be true to self and everything else just happens as it should.

I will NEVER say NEVER again!

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Exploring Male Energy


When you meet someone new it takes time to get to know who they are deep inside. Once you get past the surface layer and start to explore, the real unfolding begins. Social profiling happens naturally, giving us a clue into who someone is inside. Does he drive a Hummer, Smart Car or Hot Rod? Does he live in the City or out in the Burbs? What does he do for a living, Artist, Accountant, Fireman? What you see on the outside is not always what is on the inside. You need to dig deeper.

What someone spends their day doing can be a reflection of what interests them, sometimes, but we don’t all find ourselves immersed in our passion as a way of making a living. What matters is that we have passion somewhere within our day. Each individual soul placed on earth is here for their journey following their path. We are drawn to certain people for many different reasons. I like to think everyone has something to teach me whether it be a little or large lesson, I am open.

Our heart is what’s most important. Finding out what make it beat is the fun part. What feeds his soul? Where does he find inspiration? What does he aspire to do when he grows up? 😉 What is he doing to make a difference in the world? What makes his blood boil? What makes his heart race? What brings him to the point of no return? What brings him to his knees? What topic of conversation intrigues his intellect? What are his religious beliefs? What makes him giggle? What scares him? What part of the woman’s body does he find most erotic? Where are his erogenous zones? What was his most embarrassing moment? Has his heart been broken? Those are questions that are on my mind when I meet someone new. They don’t need to be answered right away but they are floating in the back of my subconscious.

It takes time for our true colours to shine. Everyone has had a struggle here or there, I view those moments as an opportunity for character building. Isn’t it more important how someone deals with less favourable situations than the perfect ones? We all make choices in life to where we are going, some earlier than others. Does it matter what we do as much as how we do it? Have we lost the desire to find out what really matters because we lack the time and energy to do so? Do we have the patience anymore to take the time to get to know someone, I mean really know someone!

Before you start to explore the male energy write down what it is you want his energy to radiate. Here are a few things on my wish list…care to add what’s on yours?

Passion, intellectually stimulating, sensual, romantic, sense of humour, spiritual, healthy, creative, unselfish, confident, affectionate, loves children, loves to travel, compassionate, inner strength, sexual compatibility, chemistry, loves life, strong moral values, integrity, loves nature!

Time and patience is the only true way to find out what is deep beneath the surface.

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Speak the Truth…

I can’t help but admire a man who is willing to take a chance and share his truth. It’s refreshing. I love the male energy as you all know. I have had quite a variety of man-friends throughout my life and love each and every one of them because of how easily they are able to speak the truth to me. They simply are who they are. Our friendships are easy and uncomplicated.

We have learned to sugar coat the truth when it comes to certain topics because lets face it, sometimes the truth hurts. Nobody like to hurt the feelings of another so we mix in a little white lie here and there to lessen the blow. There is a time and a place for little white lies but when it really counts the truth is always best. The truth hurts most when our Ego rears it’s ugly head. If we can ignore our ego we don’t take things so personally. When we step back and view things from a distance without our Ego influencing feelings from our heart, we become more open and honest which leads to acceptance of ones truth. We all have ego’s but if we can keep them in check or ultimately get rid of them life would be much easier.

We have learned over time to add layers to our truth complicating it each time and so it’s sometimes difficult to peel them off and see what really lies deep beneath our coat of social acceptance. I find the truth to be an incredibly attractive quality in a man. It shows he has confidence in who he is and what he wants out of life, essentially giving up control. A man who can speak the truth is allowing things to just flow as they should, not worried about time-lines or selfish needs. He is thinking of the well being of others. Exposing our personal truth makes us vulnerable, especially to those who don’t know us very well, that’s where the confidence comes in. Speak the truth and allow others to decide what they want to do with it.

Words spoken from the heart are raw and untouched not yet influenced social behaviour. They are unique to who releases them. Sometimes the truth hurts, but at least we are given the opportunity to see the real person who speaks their truth which leads us to ours.

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Pro’s to Being Single ~ (part one)

Yesterday Melissa joined us as a Guest Blogger and shared her passion for photography along with some insight of who she captures in her beautiful photographs. I let out a *romantic sigh* after reading each vignette she shared. Thanks again Melissa!

Although we are not all searching for that romantic tale I think we all feel a warmth when we see photographs of those who have clearly found it. You never know for sure when or if that person is going to walk into your life. Are you ready for them to? Should you have to be? Does fate or destiny wait for us if we’re not?

We all know I love words and messages, words and romance are my passion. Words on a list can sometimes help you decide what to do. Since I was a child I have had a hard time choosing between two of…pretty much everything. So today I decided to use my words, to make a list, to visually see if I am ready to drip with passion for the male energy! What are you willing to give up for love?

Pro’s 🙂 to Being Single;

  • You don’t have to shave your legs, or wax…a saving of approx $500 bucks a month depending on how Yeti-ish you are…keep in mind that if you get into an accident, first responders are Firemen and Murphy’s Law would have it that they’d need to cut your pants off. Weigh that one carefully ladies! (guys, it doesn’t really cost $500 bucks!)
  • You can wear what-ever you want, when-ever you want, to where-ever you want, with whom-ever you want, for how-ever long you want, or simply stay home and walk around naked! (when kids aren’t home)
  • When you lock your door, it’s just you and the 4 walls that envelope your existence, peace and quiet! (with no kids)
  • You can crank the stereo with whatever music you choose for your interlude and loop one song all day long if you want! (until kids come home)
  • Your mess is your mess, the house is as you left it. (with no kids)
  • Never ever will the waft under the blankets be foreign. (thanks for that most important point Tannia) (unless a kids in the bed)
  • You can eat popcorn and jello cups for dinner. Quick and easy! (I feed my kids)
  • You get all the covers, pillows and can sleep on any side of the bed you want and there is a huuuuge cold spot waiting for your leg to stretch to in the middle of the night. I call that the sweet spot! (unless a kids in the bed)
  • You can talk on the phone until the wee hours of the morning with whom-ever you want, in flannels with a mud mask on. (saying of course you’re naked) (unless a kids in the bed)
  • Make-up, what make-up? (kids could care less)
  • F-r-e-e-d-o-mmmmmm…sing it with me! Plain and simple, no one to answer to but yourself! (kids don’t let me sing)
  • Do I want another Tattoo? Yup…done!

That’s obviously just a few Pro’s of being single coming from a woman (with kids) ask a man and I am sure we would get an entirely different selection…ask a married man/woman and yet even more!

I just reread my post and I think I need to get rid of the kids! 😉 I’m Kidd-ing!

Pro’s to Being Attached ;

  • Hmmmm…let me think? Ummmm…well? Sheesh…well all-righty then! I’m all outta time  so next week I will share some Pro’s to Being Attached…if I can come up with any?  😉

Don’t be shy…go ahead and add your Pro to the comments!

 

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Hello Handsome…

I wrote a post last week called Exploring All Your Senses. I mentioned that sometimes we meet or know people who see us for who we truly are and it’s those individuals who make us strive to be better people. They keep us in check. They are not afraid to call us on things we say or do.

The sun came out this morning almost blinding me as I went through the Tim Hortons drive though to grab a java. I soaked up each ray with a ginormous smile on my face and even said out loud “Hello Sunshine” it felt like spring was in the air. The cashier had an extra big smile when I arrived, saying “your coffee was bought by the gentleman before you…and he was very handsome!” I giggled and said “really?” in my sweetest voice. (I was saying really to the coffee being bought not that he was handsome) I didn’t see him but that’s how she described him! Was it the kind gesture that made him handsome or was it simply his appearance that appealed to the cashier?

Which leads me to the real topic of my post…

So, I apparently describe men I meet more often than not as handsome. (my mind instantly sticks up for me justifying with…”and that’s wrong…why?”) I am only writing about this because it has been brought to my attention on more than one occasion. My initial reaction when it was first pointed out was (I won’t mention her name but she’s known me my entire life) “Well I’m just not going to tell you when I meet someone…handsome” and then the next time by two others (both handsome by the way) I said annoyed in denial “I do NOT say every guy I meet is handsome!” Which lead to a debate…that I sadly lost because of a technicality. I do in-fact describe men as handsome more often than not. One ‘other’ person added that I say “he was actually a really nice guy” but we’ll leave him out of it (he too is handsome!) 😉 HA! How lucky am I to meet so many really nice guys who so happen to be handsome! I know Bonnie is giggling with me right now!

When I describe a man as handsome I think they are but for more than their exterior. You don’t get described as handsome by me just because of how you look. I describe those guys as ‘hot’ (lol) Handsome is much deeper than hot.

I see the eyes first, then smile, then neck, and shoulders, and hands…okay, okay sorry! It’s the warmth that comes from behind a mans eyes that attracts me to him. Our conversation is what makes me want to listen and look longer, if he can make me laugh, bonus! A kind warm open heart is what will get me in the end, not handsome! Throw in intellect and I jump in with wide eyed enthusiasm! That is what makes a man handsome to me. It would have been the kind gesture that made the man who bought my coffee handsome to me. I will admit that when I am with my girlfriends feeling feisty we s-o-m-e-t-i-m-e-s just sit and appreciate the outer shell of men as they stream through the coffee shop because that’s just fun!

So, it may appear to some that I use the word ‘handsome‘ far too often and perhaps I do need to be more specific when describing the really nice men I meet. They are manly, kind, helpful, sarcastic, loving, cute, pleasing, generous, interesting, tempting, irresistibly sexy, alluring, tough, serious, intriguing, talented, intellectually stimulating, hilarious, confident…I could keep going but I am sure you get the point. I may describe men as being handsome but only because it’s a quick way of saying they made me look a little deeper than their surface because of something unique they showed me about who they are.

The man in both the photos I used has been my living example of what handsome truly is. He is my measuring stick, he is my Dad and I think he is the most handsome man EVER to have walked the earth…inside and out! xo (the beautiful woman is my Mom :))

Handsome is as handsome does…Character and behaviour are more important than appearance ~ proverb

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Who Chooses Who?


Did you chose or chase your partner? Do you think that the woman ultimately decides if a relationship is going to go any further? Men generally pursue women but not always. Some women know exactly what they want and go for it. Just like cats if you run away the game is on. Sometimes it’s just about the chase. Playing hard to get can intrigues the opposite sex but everyone has their limit to how much time or energy they will put into a chase. I’ve always thought getting someone was the easy part, it’s keeping them that challenges who we are.

Do men stay in a relationship when they know it’s not a ‘meet my mother’ kind of union just for the sex? Do women string men along while they wait for ‘Mr Pretty Damn Close to Perfect’ to walk through their door? I believe both sexes are guilty of misleading the other from time to time. Honest is always the best policy!

When you introduce someone to your friends and family you validate the relationship. You deem them worthy of joining your circle. There is nothing wrong with waiting to introduce your new guy or gal to your friends and family just to be sure. Keeping your status to yourself is probably a not a bad idea until you really know who you’re dating. We all know it takes awhile for some peoples ‘true colors to show.

It becomes pretty obvious when a relationship isn’t going further than a surface text-a-tion-ship which I’ve posted about before. It’s getting harder to differentiate the sincere from those who are just playing a game. Nobody keeps their word anymore. More often than not men and women just say what they think the opposite sex wants to hear. Stringing someone along has become second nature. Selfish behavior is rampant in the world of relationships…“what have you done for me lately” is a common attitude. Words have become diluted, faded and no longer said with meaning. Romance is becoming extinct. I do believe there’s a lots of great people out there you just have to be patient. It’s hard to find someone who hasn’t had their spirit broken when it comes to love, trust and honesty.

What women use to attract the male energy is the key to what they get. If they are simply using their sex appeal, they get a man who wants them for just that…sex. The signal or message sent out is read correctly and then women wonder why it didn’t amount to anything but a friend with benefits which is something I’ve yet to grasp. Act like a booty call and be happy with being his booty call. Pretty basic. Not that there is anything wrong with being a booty call as long as you have no expectation of ‘it’ becoming anything but a booty call. You just need to be honest with yourself about what you want.

Women sometimes allow their ego to get in the way and cloud their judgment taking the easy route by using what works, sexual manipulation. It doesn’t get you very far in the end. Being in touch with your sexuality is a great part of being human but balance is important if you want a relationship to develop into something other than a once a week romp in the hay! Chemistry is one thing but shouldn’t be confused with sexual energy which usually just leads to empty sex. For men sex is physical, for women it’s more emotional…most of the time. Not that there is anything wrong with empty sex if that’s what both parties involved are okay with. That’s where honesty is crucial.

Being able to identify when he’s just not that into you is easy if you ignore what he says and watch what he does, actions speak louder than words. Pretty simple if you actually listen to your instincts.

So when you are ready to choose or chase make sure you know exactly what you want and then take it slow. One thing I do know for sure is that if someone treats you like an option, don’t make them your priority their not worth it.

Regardless of who chooses who if the right person enters into your circle and the timing is right, you will be meeting the family…be careful what you wish for.

 

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Intimacy ~

Each month we take turns creating a new header with a word of choice. I chose Intimacy this month so today I will write about just that!

I met a man recently who has challenged me in more ways than one. I couldn’t help but be drawn to him because of the way he intrigued me with his intellect. Yes…he is handsome! Having said that, it was NOT what initially attracted me to him at all! Our conversations were filled with sarcastic banter that grabbed me by the hand and wouldn’t let go no matter how hard I tried to pull away! Oh how I love the energy of sarcastic banter! It makes the hair on the back of my neck stand on end!

In one of our great debates we took on the topic of intimacy, seeking intimacy! What would you describe intimacy to be? I always related the word intimacy to that moment shared between two during sex? Intimate sex…who doesn’t want that! I have to admit I was taken back that this man was interested in talking about intimacy, let alone seeking it himself! I love the male perspective on everything!

Yes you can have intimate sex but until you have experienced true intimacy with your partner it’s simply empty sex, the kind that leaves you feeling satisfied sexually but unsatisfied emotionally even though you had an O!

True intimacy is when two can share moments, even hours together just holding hands and touching one another without the complication of sex. You learn what really matters to each other when you share intimacy. No one has patience anymore, it’s a virtue that’s lost. It seems that everyone just wants to jump right in to bed and hope for the best and unfortunately it usually end awkwardly and prematurely (no pun intended) because no one has the desire to take it slow to find the intimate side of their partner.

Intimacy naturally appears when your ready to explore the possibilities of love in a relationship. Couples often don’t take the time that’s needed in order to experience true intimacy. Our lives are full with no room for quiet moments, that if taken would change the way we think. Intimacy can be scary. Just the thought of opening your heart and feeling vulnerable is not worth the risk for most.

Would you fall in love if you knew that it would end with a broken heart? Silly question? I don’t think so. If you answered yes then I believe you have experienced true intimate love and know it’s worth the risk. If you answered no, perhaps you have yet to feel intimate love in it’s purest form, which can include pain, but still worth the risk of a broken heart! Intimate love is possible, it’s out there, waiting for us to take a chance and open our hearts to explore the possibilities!

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