Tracy’s Rants at the Fat Suit Actress!

I was going to post something lovely today about inspirational messages, but my hormones went wild yesterday so I’m kinda feeling a little feisty! Hormones are the bitch not the woman experiencing them…just to be clear!

Is it just me or is anyone else appalled by the actresses or wanna-be actresses who think it’s empathetic to put on a prosthetic fat suit and go out in public to see for themselves how heavy people feel? A day in the life of…seriously? I am sickened by anyone who would even think of putting on a prosthetic fat face and fill their leggings with padding to make it appear that they were 400 lbs. I’m sorry your point is…what? That is NOTHING like being fat!! You can’t relate to having a bite of a burger, how on earth can you relate to someone morbidly overweight? How about you actually GET fat and see what its like to actually be overweight, like the guy from Super-size me! At least he was willing to go the distance for his story until he was advised to stop because he could actually die! So correct me if I’m wrong, but would putting on a bald cap for the day give you an idea of what its like to have cancer? Hmmm what’s it like to be disabled…spend the day in a wheel chair to find out! I just don’t get it.

Did you really think you were incognito? I’m sorry who are you again? I wasn’t paying attention when they mentioned your name because I was gasping for air in disbelief at this story! A florescent pink track suit…seriously? I can’t remember ever seeing a large woman wearing such a thing? And if a very large woman did sport a florescent pink skin tight track suit, she does NOT care what YOUR skinny size 0 ass thinks. I seriously think you need to go somewhere private and seagull a juicy burger with the works because the Charmin you’ve been scarfin down in Costco size packages is making you behave strange! Just sayin…

My thyroid went hypothyroid after my first pregnancy so I understand how hard it is for some people who try to lose weight with no success. It basically means no matter what you do, your body thinks you are laying on the couch eating twinkies all day doing zip! I ran 10k 4-5 times a week and still never lost an ounce. I finally accepted that I was no longer a size 8. I would have to be happy with a large size 10-12 until I could figure my thyroid out. I can see how difficult it could be for those who aren’t proactive in regard to their health. Weight gain is a slippery slope. Gaining weigh = unhappiness, unhappiness = eating more out of depression and so they slide even further. Not everyone has a great support system in place. Let’s face it, it’s hard to lose weight!

Human beings can be cruel to those who are struggling with their weight or anything for that matter, they see a weakness and go for the kill. It makes them feel better about themselves. Do we really need to see someone get into a fat suit and have a ‘hidden camera’ follow them around to understand the struggle. Humiliating and mocking them can’t possibly help. The last thing anyone needs is another person pointing out the obvious! If you haven’t ever struggled with your weight you can’t relate. People overeat for physiological reasons and some just can’t get their hormones balanced.

FYI, the average size of a woman is actually between the sizes 12-18, not 0-2!

I watched a show called Extreme Makeover Weight Loss Edition, where personal trainer Chris Powell helps obese men and woman lose weight, sometimes 100+ lbs over the course of a year. To qualify for the show they have to have made an effort themselves to lose weight before they get his help to reach their goals. They are educated, counselled, and given incentives to succeed. They have to go off on their own for the last couple of months to maintain their weight without the connection of Chris Powell, so you see how empowered they are at the end of the show. It’s impressive the will power and drive these individuals have. Chris has such empathy and compassion for each person he works with. It’s a very touching show to see how someone can overcome obstacles they have dealt with for far too long. Heart breaking, life changing and life saving in some cases.

Putting on a fat suit for the day or week however long they do this charade is not realistic. The actress gets to pull off her prosthetic face and suit at the end of the day and it’s back to being a size 0, and off to Pilates she goes.

I remember my doctors receptionist putting it in perspective for me when she recognized how unhappy I was with my weight after trying so hard to correct my thyroid. She said ” it doesn’t matter what size you are as long as you are eating healthy, exercising and doing all you can to have a healthy body and mind”. I left that day not worrying so much about what size pants I fit into. Diet and exercise is no longer about losing weight but about being healthy. I run now for my heart and to clear my mind, not the size of my dress. After working with my Naturopath I did manage to balance my thyroid.

We all have struggles in life, some are with our weight, alcohol, drugs, some are not visible to the naked eye. Treat others as you would want them to treat you. It’s pretty simple. Be kind.

Svaha ~

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Eat Eat Eat Pray Love…

Keep in mind when you read this post it’s my personal feelings about me, not you or anyone else! And yes I am being really hard on myself because I’m allowed, by next week I will be awesome once again! This is the splendour of being a women in your 40’s!

As I looked in the mirror my inner voice whispered “why are my feet always so sore?” Looking right at me was this women who had the nerve to shout back “If you lost a few pounds maybe they wouldn’t be!” Maybe she’s right? Maybe it’s not from overuse but abuse! My poor feet are taking on the task of holding up all of me!

I’ll get to the point, I have some unwanted flub. (my daughter word for fat, it’s much nicer sounding so I will use it here) Throughout my entire life I’ve been in great shape, with the exception of my thyroid going hypo after my first child, twelve years ago. So I understand what it is like to try to lose a few pounds and not be able to. It’s frustrating to say the least. I would run between 30-40 Kilometres a week and not lose an ounce. I was also one of those women in my 20-30 who could eat anything, I didn’t but I could. But this time my unwanted flub, is because I’m content with who I am and simply don’t care if I’ve put on a few pounds because there is no one around to see it, I mean really see it. It’s been 18 years since I’ve been solo and just had me to answer to. It’s liberating and with that comes a little indulgence and relaxation. A holiday of sorts. But every holiday must come to a close and that is where I am at this moment, the climax if you will, of my eat of Eat Pray Love. I will move forward to Pray, or meditation very soon!

I know there are many women who can relate to how I feel about my body right now. For me it goes in cycles or waves.

Lately its like I black out for a moment (I’m sure my eyes roll back in my head) from the time I have the Oreo cookie twisting open, to flashing forward to the last delicious sweet tasting morsel sliding down my feeding tube straight to my ass via my stomach. It ain’t pretty! I don’t even like Oreo cookies! Someone please say they can relate!

The only way my body looks appealing to me at the moment is if I have both arm straight above my head stretched out like I am hanging on the monkey bars or riding a really great roller coaster, in candle light! whooooo hooooo! What are the odds that when I meet a potential suitor, I am going to be standing with both arms raised way above my head? It’s not likely! I need to do something about this NOW, its crunch time! It’s time to either get fit or have flub.

My timing is not good, I came to this realization the day before our Tara Cronica photo shoot with the beautiful photographer Cathy Empey! I would have been in full on panic mode if Bonnie and Jacquie were ripped! lol (they’re not either *phew* :)) or if I didn’t completely 100% trust Cathy’s expertise! Cathy is amazing at capturing women pure and simple! She photographs women of all shapes and sizes so beautifully that it takes away any fear or insecurity you may have with your body. We spent 3 hours with Cathy and by the end of the shoot I felt empowered again! Every women has self doubt or inhibitions but we have to put those aside and really work on loving every inch of our skin.

The bottom line for me is that I feel better when I am in shape, because it is me to be in shape. I envy women who really embrace their full voluptuous figures. I’m not sure there is anything sexier! It all boils down to accepting our bodies no matter what stage of life we’re in and loving all of who we are. Working with what we were given, not just changing it.

I started running again which works for me, it felt like I hadn’t missed a beat. When I run it’s me time, a form of meditation which I need to feel whole. We need to do what feels right for us individually, it’s not about being a bathing suit model, it’s about loving yourself from the inside out and having acceptance for who we are. I am who I am and I love who I’ve become, remembering that, I can do anything. I did take a picture of me with my hands raised way up over my head that I planned on adding to this post but…ya no, there is no point to see where I was, but to only see where I am going.

Embrace the shape your in Ladies!

If you would like to have Cathy capture your inner beauty check out her website! Boudoir by Cathy Empey ~

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Does Size Really Matter?

TracyOkay, get your mind out of the gutter. It’s way too early to be talking about that…I had another draft scheduled this morning but Jacquie’s post ‘Yup, Talking Body Image Again‘ hit a chord with me because I, too, can relate.  In the big picture, does size really matter?

I tuned into X-Weighted with Paul Plakas this morning and it really moved me.  Let me explain.  This beautiful overweight women Sharla signed up to be on TV to help motivate herself to lose weight.  She was 234lbs to start and her goal was to ride her bike 50k while towing her daughter Toni who suffers from Cerebral Palsy.  Sharla could not be successful at her current weight and fitness level.

When the layers were stripped off  why she had not been successful before (the part I love the most)  it was because she was hiding behind her child’s disability and feared failure.  To see this women come to that conclusion herself brought tears to my eyes.  She started out with the support of her friend and, because of her friend’s own fears, her friend quit and she had to go it alone.  She reached her goal and lost 50 lbs and looked fabulous!!  She is not a small women by designers standards, but very average in real standards, so I could relate.

She empowered herself by changing her mind set;  it was not about losing the weight but about losing the fear of failure.  When she no longer feared failure she was successful. And that’s the message I got out of the show.  It didn’t matter what size she was- I didn’t pay attention to that part- what mattered was that she was fulfilling herself and by doing that she found happiness within.  Her friend had fears of her own that she was now aware of and could start stripping the layers away herself in order to reach toward her own goals.

I was thin my entire life, almost too thin at times looking like a bobble head, eating popcorn for dinner, fitting into size 5 jeans.  After my first child my thyroid shut down (Hypothyroid).  I could run 30k a week and still not lose an ounce.  I was fat according to my standard and hid behind baggy shirts and tights.  I know what it does to your self esteem when you have a weight issue because I have been there and I couldn’t do a thing about it.  Having been so lean all my life it was one of the most difficult things to come to terms with.  But when put into perspective I was not dealing with cancer and I was alive.  I learned over the years as I dealt with my thyroid that those around me didn’t notice the weight because they saw me.  They loved me for me.  That’s a great feeling!  It was a great learning process.  I remember my doctor’s receptionist Angela saying to me as I struggled with regulating my weight “Tracy it doesn’t matter what size you are, what matters is that you are eating healthy and exercising”.  That stayed with me.  She was right, I was doing everything I could to be healthy and I eventually I regulated my thyroid through my Naturopathic doctor.  In the big picture size definitely doesn’t matter as long as you are living a healthy lifestyle.

Carri & Mike We are all different body shapes and sizes and as long as you are not neglecting your health and not afraid of failure you can do anything!

I have watched my girlfriend Carri work toward a goal for the past two years.  Rain or shine she put her shoes on and did the work required to meet her goal.  She never gave up, she made a decision to not fail.  Carri is happy within herself which can only benefit her gorgeous family, especially Mike ~ lol!  It wasn’t about the weight.  She looked great before.  It was about setting a goal and reaching it by not being afraid to fail.  Way to go, Carri, you look incredible and I admire you for sticking to a goal and not being afraid to fail!  Tracy signiture

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Ever had an Obsession? Do Tell!

Jacquie’s take~

post-pic-3-12When I think of the word ‘obsession’ I think of an action or thought or feeling that is all-consuming and thereby counterproductive.  So, yeah, of course I’ve been obsessed a few times in my life!

The biggest obsessions I’ve had have revolved around my kids.  I’m a bit of a collector by nature and so when my girls got into beanie babies 10 years ago I thought I’d surprise them by picking up a few of the really hard to find ones on eBay.   It was an incredible rush to go through the auction process, only to lose out at the last minute to the more savvy bidders who knew all the tricks.  I made it my personal goal to learn how to win and as a result I was able to get some of the most coveted items.  Unfortunately, my girls had lost interest in the meantime.  I soon realized that I had taken away all the fun for them because it was no longer about cherishing what they’d been able to find on their own.

I’ve collected everything from carnival glass, beads, paints, fabric and china just because I like the texture and the colors.  My china is all different patterns because I could never decide on just one look and I like to go to flea markets when out of town.  I used to be obsessed with finding just the right new dinner plates.  I now actually say a little mantra when I feel the urge to pick up something  ~  ”Will this really make your life better?”  The answer is now “No, I like it but I can be happy without it”.

Someone out there will immediately know what having an obsession with collecting means.  I think I have a pretty good idea myself.  I’ve watched enough Oprah to have that figured out!

Bonnie’s two cents~

Obsession–noun

  1. the domination of one’s thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, image, desire, etc.
  2. the idea, image, desire, feeling, etc., itself.
  3. the state of being obsessed.
  4. the act of obsessing.

Bonnie's PostWell when you put it that way I guess I have.   I was once obsessed with a thought.  A kind of doomsday thought.  The seed for this thought was planted years ago by a psychic I had visited a few times.  The thing with this particular psychic was that she was pretty darned accurate most of the time, some might even say “spot on” in many of her predictions.

I visited her a couple of years before I met my husband John and she told me that I would meet the “one” within the next couple of years.  Check.  She told me she saw me living in a white house beside the water with this love of my life.  Check.  I was a single mother of one when I spoke to her but she said I would have four children.  This made me laugh.  I had not considered step children at that point.  Four children.  Check.  One thing she said, that I didn’t think much about at the time but that would later become my obsession, was this:   “You will have a wonderfully happy life with this man…but it will end too soon.  It will not be a long enough relationship for you.”  She didn’t get into details, in fact that was all she would say about that, and I put it out of my mind.  Until I was with John, living in our white house beside the lake when it hit me.  All the things she’d predicted had come true!  So now when was this relationship going to come to a sudden halt?  The only way I could imagine that happening was if John was to die on me.   And there it was.  The beginning of my obsession with the thought that my John would die early and break my heart.  He travels a lot with work and so every time he was leaving to go away I would sob and worry that I would never see him again.  I was like this for years.  It’s exhausting worrying about ridiculous things.  Poor John kept telling me to stop imagining him with one foot in the grave.  Then I started to worry that it might come true simply because I gave the thought too much of my focus and energy…power of attraction…that kind of thing.  I was going crazy.  Maybe that would be how it ended too soon.  John had to commit me.

I’ve finally stopped the craziness and I don’t obsess over the thought of losing John anymore…much…no really…hardly ever…no…never at all anymore.

I have to share with you the wonderful positive thing that came of all of this obsessing.  I have always (and still do) absolutely appreciated every moment that I spend with my husband.  My silly fear taught me a great lesson in appreciation and when you are always in appreciation of someone it makes for a very strong bond of love.

Tracy’s thoughts~

Tracy

Yes, I have had an Obsession!  His name starts with the letter…I am kidding!  My real obsession was with exercise.  This particular time it had a negative effects on my body and here is why.  I was heading off to Cabo with Jacquie last year around this time and as soon as I booked my ticket I started to work out really, really hard.  Working out for me has always been part of my life but this was more than I was used to.  I did a intense stair routine for an 1 hour at the local track 3 days a week and ran 3 days a week anywhere from 5 -10 K.  I literally lived in my running gear!

When I look back I see that I was obsessed, but at the time I was just stepping it up a bit.  By doing this I completely threw my hormones out of balance.  My endocrine system was turned upside down.  I had my menstrual cycle for 48 days straight and then not at all for 3 months.  Nothing should bleed for that long and live…seriously!  It was a real concern for about 6 months.  I sought help from my Doctor with no luck in finding out what was going on.  I must admit I got very impatient.  I was put on birth control pills to try to balance my cycle.  Test after test, throw a day surgery in there for fun and still no resolution for me.  I finally went to see a Naturopathic Doctor who had balanced my Thyroid after being Hypothyroid after child birth.(slow metabolism no matter how hard you work out you don’t lose an ounce! It sucked big time)  He balanced that naturally so I gave him another try.  I needed to cleanse my system or as he put it take out the garbage and reboot my endocrine system like we do our computers after they crash.  I did a kidney cleanse and took a natural capsule that binds excess estrogen in your system  and I was regular a month later and have been since.  That was my obsession, exercise. Moderation is key!

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