Happiness…is a Vibe Away ~

Bonnie shared Mr Happy Man, Johnny Barnes with us on Sunday, I continued the theme on Monday with The Science of Happiness not having read her post yet and so today I couldn’t resist keeping the Happiness Vibe going…(insert cheeky grin here) ;)

I had a great giggle with some girls at work a couple of weeks ago. (yes I have a real job) They came into the Cosmetic Department giggling while they put what they were purchasing down on the counter. It was a We-Vibe vibrator. I had never seen one like this before, and certainly didn’t think where I worked sold them! Eyes wide open I curiously asked “Really…is this what I think it is?” They replied in unison “I KNOW we couldn’t believe you sold them here!” The Cosmetics Department is slightly more private than the front of the store so I understood why they came to me, but they still caught me off guard, yes me! We all stood giggling and read the box together. My female manager told me we couldn’t keep them on the shelf! “No wonder I said have you seen it?…it has a remote control!” I’m just waiting for the day the young stock boy puts it down the toy isle!

A-p-p-a-r-e-n-t-l-y…58% of people have bought a ‘sex-aid’ of some kind. I thought that number was low, the survey was that of our American neighbour.

A couple of days later another woman bought the male and female version for a wedding gift. All I could think about was the look on the Bride and Grooms face when they opened their gifts in front of their families! Bride:“YES!” Groom:“What is it?” (she confessed she didn’t know them that well which made me like her even more.“Wanna come to a wedding?” almost came out of my mouth…and then I remembered I was at work! I was surfing the net looking for a photo for another post and funny enough the We-Vibe came up yet again! A sign, right? That’s what I thought too! I added the link Bon, happiness is just a click away! (not all of us have a Johnny!) I couldn’t resist following the link for research *cough* and it took me to Dr Oz’s website and low and behold he was talking about it too!

Dr Oz had his Top 3 Bedroom Boosters, Part 1 & Part 2 that included:

  • Liberator Wedge Pillow for those who suffer from back pain so severe it distracts and prevents them from being intimate with their partner. Pillows would also do the trick!
  • We-Vibe Vibrator which is a g-spot stimulater that enhances both the male and female experience while doing the deed. Go on click on the link, the page is safe! You know you want to!
  • Maca Root Powder increases the libido and sex drive in both men and women. When women approach menopause their libido sadly fades as does the libido of men once they reach the sexy age of 50. (Not all but some) Oddly enough I take Maca Root but didn’t know it increased your libido, no wonder! I thought I was taking it for my hormones…win/win! Ya gotta love the Incan’s for figuring this one out! I’ve always wanted to explore Peru! My girlfriend told me she took it for hot-flashes (nice try Sand)

There are obviously more bedroom boosters than the three mentioned here. Living a healthy lifestyle that includes eating right, exercise and finding happiness in the moment your in is a great start! Being Happy sends out a vibe like no other! Anyone care to share a bedroom booster with us?

Happy Hump Day Everyone!

Happiness…;)

 

Tracy’s Rants at the Fat Suit Actress!

I was going to post something lovely today about inspirational messages, but my hormones went wild yesterday so I’m kinda feeling a little feisty! Hormones are the bitch not the woman experiencing them…just to be clear!

Is it just me or is anyone else appalled by the actresses or wanna-be actresses who think it’s empathetic to put on a prosthetic fat suit and go out in public to see for themselves how heavy people feel? A day in the life of…seriously? I am sickened by anyone who would even think of putting on a prosthetic fat face and fill their leggings with padding to make it appear that they were 400 lbs. I’m sorry your point is…what? That is NOTHING like being fat!! You can’t relate to having a bite of a burger, how on earth can you relate to someone morbidly overweight? How about you actually GET fat and see what its like to actually be overweight, like the guy from Super-size me! At least he was willing to go the distance for his story until he was advised to stop because he could actually die! So correct me if I’m wrong, but would putting on a bald cap for the day give you an idea of what its like to have cancer? Hmmm what’s it like to be disabled…spend the day in a wheel chair to find out! I just don’t get it.

Did you really think you were incognito? I’m sorry who are you again? I wasn’t paying attention when they mentioned your name because I was gasping for air in disbelief at this story! A florescent pink track suit…seriously? I can’t remember ever seeing a large woman wearing such a thing? And if a very large woman did sport a florescent pink skin tight track suit, she does NOT care what YOUR skinny size 0 ass thinks. I seriously think you need to go somewhere private and seagull a juicy burger with the works because the Charmin you’ve been scarfin down in Costco size packages is making you behave strange! Just sayin…

My thyroid went hypothyroid after my first pregnancy so I understand how hard it is for some people who try to lose weight with no success. It basically means no matter what you do, your body thinks you are laying on the couch eating twinkies all day doing zip! I ran 10k 4-5 times a week and still never lost an ounce. I finally accepted that I was no longer a size 8. I would have to be happy with a large size 10-12 until I could figure my thyroid out. I can see how difficult it could be for those who aren’t proactive in regard to their health. Weight gain is a slippery slope. Gaining weigh = unhappiness, unhappiness = eating more out of depression and so they slide even further. Not everyone has a great support system in place. Let’s face it, it’s hard to lose weight!

Human beings can be cruel to those who are struggling with their weight or anything for that matter, they see a weakness and go for the kill. It makes them feel better about themselves. Do we really need to see someone get into a fat suit and have a ‘hidden camera’ follow them around to understand the struggle. Humiliating and mocking them can’t possibly help. The last thing anyone needs is another person pointing out the obvious! If you haven’t ever struggled with your weight you can’t relate. People overeat for physiological reasons and some just can’t get their hormones balanced.

FYI, the average size of a woman is actually between the sizes 12-18, not 0-2!

I watched a show called Extreme Makeover Weight Loss Edition, where personal trainer Chris Powell helps obese men and woman lose weight, sometimes 100+ lbs over the course of a year. To qualify for the show they have to have made an effort themselves to lose weight before they get his help to reach their goals. They are educated, counselled, and given incentives to succeed. They have to go off on their own for the last couple of months to maintain their weight without the connection of Chris Powell, so you see how empowered they are at the end of the show. It’s impressive the will power and drive these individuals have. Chris has such empathy and compassion for each person he works with. It’s a very touching show to see how someone can overcome obstacles they have dealt with for far too long. Heart breaking, life changing and life saving in some cases.

Putting on a fat suit for the day or week however long they do this charade is not realistic. The actress gets to pull off her prosthetic face and suit at the end of the day and it’s back to being a size 0, and off to Pilates she goes.

I remember my doctors receptionist putting it in perspective for me when she recognized how unhappy I was with my weight after trying so hard to correct my thyroid. She said ” it doesn’t matter what size you are as long as you are eating healthy, exercising and doing all you can to have a healthy body and mind”. I left that day not worrying so much about what size pants I fit into. Diet and exercise is no longer about losing weight but about being healthy. I run now for my heart and to clear my mind, not the size of my dress. After working with my Naturopath I did manage to balance my thyroid.

We all have struggles in life, some are with our weight, alcohol, drugs, some are not visible to the naked eye. Treat others as you would want them to treat you. It’s pretty simple. Be kind.

Svaha ~

Raising a Teenager…

First things first, Mom and Dad, I love and appreciate everything you ever did for me growing up! You Rocked as parents! I loved hanging out with you. Our house always felt safe. Having kids of my own entering their teens I understand how important it is for them to feel like they have a place where they can be themselves. I love being the house where kids gather and hang out.

Teenagers are naturally programmed to push the boundaries to get their own independence. One day parents are hilarious and the next day our behavior is embarrassing and frowned upon. That’s a hard transition to make as a parent. Words out of the mouths of babes are cute, out of the mouths of teenagers can sometimes sting.

Surging hormones, cry-laugh-bitch all within 3 minutes of each other sums up the unpredictable life of a teen. Remember how up and down your emotions were during puberty? My only hope is that I don’t go through peri-menopause at the same time my daughter goes through puberty or she’ll be going to the moon with Alice!

I was a great kid growing up, until my Mom wouldn’t let my older boyfriend (wild bill) who had a beard, study in my room with the door closed. Okay I find humour in that now, was it really that obvious! What-EVER! She turned into the opposition that day but fortunately it only lasted a short time, at least that’s my recollection. My Mom just let me ride the hormone wave until I was done while she maintained her loving support with my Dad at her side incase she needed the big guns for back-up. (she did, it worked) Thanks Mom! I learned a thing or two about respect in a very short time. (ya never call your Mom the B-word…doesn’t turn out in your favour…ever!)

When you’re a teen you can’t imagine your parents doing anything remotely close to sex so you assume you can pull the wool over their eyes! If your reading this Jordan, if your boyfriend has a beard, he won’t even be entering the front door let alone your pig sty you call a room! Fortunately for me my Mom was smart, understanding and stood her ground keeping me headed in the right direction. I can now appreciate how hard it was for her to deal with a girl-tween.

I have a 13 year old son who is way too charming and handsome for his own good and a 10 going on 16 year old girl who is starting to strike fear into us with how beautiful she is inside and out. Thank god she has a hilarious sense of humour! Her brother is going to have his work cut out for him in high school. The fun has just begun! I’m definitely up for the challenge and also have a great support system in place. Hugely important!

I liked my parents so I spent lots of time with them. They were cool parents that were always there for me no matter what. My Mom was generous, loving and very open and my Dad was encouraging and hilarious so were laughing all the time. We still do. I was never able to lie to my Mom, maybe because I didn’t need to. She was completely tuned into what I was up, and still is. She can tell by the sound of my voice what’s going on in my life. Honestly I always feel better after hearing her advice. I don’t always take it but I still like to hear it.

I recently had ‘the’ talk with my son on the way to a party about being aware and safe. I had the same talk my Dad had with me. He simply told me I was his only daughter who he loved and trusted and couldn’t imagine life without me. He always wanted me to be safe. I told my son how important it is to always have a clear mind. It’s when your mind is clouded that things can go terribly wrong. Teaching your kids to make conscious smart choices is so important, to be a leader not a follower. Its tough raising kids when they’re little but nothing prepares you for when they start to spread their wings to fly on their own, bitter sweet for sure. Telling your kids that you trust them right before they go out is like buying insurance, no kid really wants to disappoint their parents. Say it even if you don’t! :) All kids make mistakes, the key is to be there for them when they do and support them, don’t say I told you so!

Kids need their parents when they are little to survive, but I think when they start to naturally push us away is when they need us more, even if it’s sitting together in silence. Just knowing your there if they reach out is sometimes all they need.

 

Bustin’ Out! or Rack it Up to Lessons Learned!

Bonnie Johnson's PostI haven’t told many people this before but when I was a young girl living in Australia I developed a bit of a complex.  I moved down unda when I was ten years old and I was shocked to discover that most of the girls in my grade five class were already developing…you know…boobs, breasts, a decent rack.  I, on the other hand, only felt a slight sensitivity on one side.  One side! What’s up with that?  Not even a hint of swelling though.  Ya, it was a bit of an issue for me.  What’s worse is that the same young girls were all beginning to menstruate too.  They were blossoming into women at the ripe old age of ten and eleven years old.  (Looking back now I suspect high levels of hormones in their milk or meat pies)

I began to believe there was something very wrong with me.  The other girls sensed my shame and teased me about it while some kinder souls thought they were showing they cared when they asked me every month if it had come yet. I felt their eyes searching the front of my school jumper (“sweater” in canadian) for any new bumps and then either smirked or looked away in pity.

My best friend, Joanne, had the most impressive…um, chest, of all.  I remember one day walking along the highway with her and cars kept honking at her until she asked me to switch sides with her.  And yes the honking stopped.  So you see how this complex came to be.  Joanne was also still growing and she had faith that one day I would too.  I’ll never forget how thrilled I was when she gave me one of the bras she had out grown.  I would put it on stuffed with socks to see how the real ones might feel one day.  It was my first crack at “visualization”.  I also put that bra under my pillow and prayed that God would grant me the full round chest of my dreams.  I’m not kidding.  I so badly wanted to go to school bleeding and busty and prove my womanhood to those Aussies.  I guess those reasons weren’t really pure enough and so it was all denied to me until I was back on Canadian soil five long years later.

My praying and visualizing paid off and yes, my wish was granted.  I have been proud of my ‘girls’ for years, until recently.  They’ve started growing again! Along with other parts of me that I don’t want any larger, thank you.  And that other thing I wished so hard for has outgrown its purpose and has just become a big pain.  Literally.

Last night I found myself jumping up and down while dancing at my Zumba class and cursing the way my girls were threatening to blacken both eyes if I didn’t stop.  I shot annoyed glances at all the smaller chested women who I knew by the happy looks on their faces weren’t feeling the pain I was in.  The music blared “…makes me want to jump…throw my hands up and shout…” NO, it makes me want to cry and hold onto these jugs with both hands so they don’t rip off and bounce away.

So if any of you have a size B cup bra that you don’t need anymore, I have a pillow to place it under and pray over.

Lesson:  Be careful what you wish for.

huge boobs

Not really a picture of me...just how I feel sometimes

Bonnie

Ever had an Obsession? Do Tell!

Jacquie’s take~

post-pic-3-12When I think of the word ‘obsession’ I think of an action or thought or feeling that is all-consuming and thereby counterproductive.  So, yeah, of course I’ve been obsessed a few times in my life!

The biggest obsessions I’ve had have revolved around my kids.  I’m a bit of a collector by nature and so when my girls got into beanie babies 10 years ago I thought I’d surprise them by picking up a few of the really hard to find ones on eBay.   It was an incredible rush to go through the auction process, only to lose out at the last minute to the more savvy bidders who knew all the tricks.  I made it my personal goal to learn how to win and as a result I was able to get some of the most coveted items.  Unfortunately, my girls had lost interest in the meantime.  I soon realized that I had taken away all the fun for them because it was no longer about cherishing what they’d been able to find on their own.

I’ve collected everything from carnival glass, beads, paints, fabric and china just because I like the texture and the colors.  My china is all different patterns because I could never decide on just one look and I like to go to flea markets when out of town.  I used to be obsessed with finding just the right new dinner plates.  I now actually say a little mantra when I feel the urge to pick up something  ~  ”Will this really make your life better?”  The answer is now “No, I like it but I can be happy without it”.

Someone out there will immediately know what having an obsession with collecting means.  I think I have a pretty good idea myself.  I’ve watched enough Oprah to have that figured out!

Bonnie’s two cents~

Obsession–noun

  1. the domination of one’s thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, image, desire, etc.
  2. the idea, image, desire, feeling, etc., itself.
  3. the state of being obsessed.
  4. the act of obsessing.

Bonnie's PostWell when you put it that way I guess I have.   I was once obsessed with a thought.  A kind of doomsday thought.  The seed for this thought was planted years ago by a psychic I had visited a few times.  The thing with this particular psychic was that she was pretty darned accurate most of the time, some might even say “spot on” in many of her predictions.

I visited her a couple of years before I met my husband John and she told me that I would meet the “one” within the next couple of years.  Check.  She told me she saw me living in a white house beside the water with this love of my life.  Check.  I was a single mother of one when I spoke to her but she said I would have four children.  This made me laugh.  I had not considered step children at that point.  Four children.  Check.  One thing she said, that I didn’t think much about at the time but that would later become my obsession, was this:   “You will have a wonderfully happy life with this man…but it will end too soon.  It will not be a long enough relationship for you.”  She didn’t get into details, in fact that was all she would say about that, and I put it out of my mind.  Until I was with John, living in our white house beside the lake when it hit me.  All the things she’d predicted had come true!  So now when was this relationship going to come to a sudden halt?  The only way I could imagine that happening was if John was to die on me.   And there it was.  The beginning of my obsession with the thought that my John would die early and break my heart.  He travels a lot with work and so every time he was leaving to go away I would sob and worry that I would never see him again.  I was like this for years.  It’s exhausting worrying about ridiculous things.  Poor John kept telling me to stop imagining him with one foot in the grave.  Then I started to worry that it might come true simply because I gave the thought too much of my focus and energy…power of attraction…that kind of thing.  I was going crazy.  Maybe that would be how it ended too soon.  John had to commit me.

I’ve finally stopped the craziness and I don’t obsess over the thought of losing John anymore…much…no really…hardly ever…no…never at all anymore.

I have to share with you the wonderful positive thing that came of all of this obsessing.  I have always (and still do) absolutely appreciated every moment that I spend with my husband.  My silly fear taught me a great lesson in appreciation and when you are always in appreciation of someone it makes for a very strong bond of love.

Tracy’s thoughts~

Tracy

Yes, I have had an Obsession!  His name starts with the letter…I am kidding!  My real obsession was with exercise.  This particular time it had a negative effects on my body and here is why.  I was heading off to Cabo with Jacquie last year around this time and as soon as I booked my ticket I started to work out really, really hard.  Working out for me has always been part of my life but this was more than I was used to.  I did a intense stair routine for an 1 hour at the local track 3 days a week and ran 3 days a week anywhere from 5 -10 K.  I literally lived in my running gear!

When I look back I see that I was obsessed, but at the time I was just stepping it up a bit.  By doing this I completely threw my hormones out of balance.  My endocrine system was turned upside down.  I had my menstrual cycle for 48 days straight and then not at all for 3 months.  Nothing should bleed for that long and live…seriously!  It was a real concern for about 6 months.  I sought help from my Doctor with no luck in finding out what was going on.  I must admit I got very impatient.  I was put on birth control pills to try to balance my cycle.  Test after test, throw a day surgery in there for fun and still no resolution for me.  I finally went to see a Naturopathic Doctor who had balanced my Thyroid after being Hypothyroid after child birth.(slow metabolism no matter how hard you work out you don’t lose an ounce! It sucked big time)  He balanced that naturally so I gave him another try.  I needed to cleanse my system or as he put it take out the garbage and reboot my endocrine system like we do our computers after they crash.  I did a kidney cleanse and took a natural capsule that binds excess estrogen in your system  and I was regular a month later and have been since.  That was my obsession, exercise. Moderation is key!