Do we have time to ‘Date’ anymore?

We all have such busy lives. We barely have time for ourselves let alone someone we don’t know yet.  Which makes me ask, do we have time to date anymore?The Dating Game

I have been wondering lately how much effort I would put into dating.  First of all you have to want to date and I am not sure many of us do.  Where do you even start?  Where do you meet new people?  Do you join the gym or hang out at Starbucks?  What if you like to run alone and have your own espresso machine?  I am curious where people meet these days.  I asked a few friends of mine and they said they joined an online dating service.  I think I would have a hard time with that.  But when you think of how busy we are, when do we have the time to meet someone new if not online, at night, in the comfort of our own home?  It kind of made sense to me…kind of.

Here’s how it works, you join, create a HONEST profile,  post a RECENT photo of yourself and then you email back and forth to potential prospects, a sort of dating foreplay I guess. On line flirting without having to commit!  Sign me up!

I love flirting in person myself,  hearing the tone of the conversation.  The male voice is all part of it.  The unique inflection of every word can be so sexy and suggestive.  You can’t hear that in an email or text.  The spontaneity or sarcastic banter back and forth that happens when you meet someone that interests you is such a turn on.  Emails and text messaging is for passing casual information, not for dating as far as I am concerned.  There is far too much left for interpretation, in the wrong way.  You can’t hear or see the truth in an email or text message and quite often the wrong impression is sent.  Instinct is lost.

With online dating if you don’t like where the conversation is going you just don’t meet up.  Is that taking the easy way out?  Or is it saving your precious time without having to hurt feeling face to face.  I have mixed feelings about dating services.  I think most people are way too tempted to exaggerate and make a slightly less than honest profile.  I would feel like I was filling out a job application.  My biggest fear would be that someone I knew would email me and I would be totally embarrassed and then have to avoid them.  What if my ex joined too and each of us only had one match.  You dial the private number attached to the profile that looks like your ex when he was wayyyy younger, this guy is just perfect for you, and he answers!  Then what?

Meeting someone through your friends is possible but does that ever really work?  I won’t even mention dating at the work place because absolutely no good what so ever will come of that I can promise you!  Unless of course you don’t really like your job or don’t mind looking the other way each time he/she passes by you.

I can think of a few guys I might date if the opportunity arose but one would have to lose his wife and the other his girlfriend so that’s out!  Do we really care enough to create the opportunities?  Does anyone ever REALLY put themselves out there anymore.  I think not!  And I understand why.  It takes years to get to know someone and just seconds to just not be that into you/him anymore.  I think that when we have time to ourselves, we are not in such a rush anymore to share it with anyone.  Timing is a big part of when and if we have space for someone in our lives.  It has to be for want, not need.  There is a difference.  When your ready you should put yourself out there in anyway that suits you, dating service, blind dates, friend of a friend, join the gym or leave it up to fate and destiny to find that sparkle in someones eyes.fate

I have decided to just go with the flow and enjoy everyone who walks through the door for who they are.  No expectations or obligations or rules to follow.

So to answer my question.  Do we have time to date anymore?  I think so, when we’re ready, willing and able.  Until then if you can’t be with the one you love, love the one your with for who they are and  just enjoy every day we have on this planet, living in the now!

Here are a few links I found for those who might be interested in more information:

CBC Marketplace (more info for online dating)

PlentyOfFish (free online dating service)

Tracy

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Do you ever lie about your age?

Bonnie’s take~

Who me?…lie? No way.  I look really really good for 56 years old!

That’s right, if I was going to lie about my age I’d definitely lie up.  I recently read about a woman doing just that and I thought “Now that’s the way to do it!”.  People will admire how well you’ve aged.  Snort!

The last time I lied about my age was when I was not quite old enough to enter a night club.   I borrowed a friend’s I.D. (who looked nothing like me) to show at the door.  It worked (obviously the doorman didn’t look very closely) and I was allowed to enter.  I was uncomfortable all night waiting to be discovered and then thrown out.  I’m not very good at breaking the rules.  If the sign says “No Trespassers” then I will not trespass…very willingly…ok, I know some of you reading this have trespassed with me but if you’ll remember, it was your idea and I was not comfortable with it!

Nah, I’m fine with telling the truth about my age or anything else you might ask me.  Mind you, I’ve never had to compete with younger women for a job or a movie role.  So far.  If I’m ever in that situation I may think differently, but then again, lying about your age is only half of it.  You have to make them believe it too.

~Bonnie

Tracy’s 2 cents~

Have I ever lied about my age… lately?  I can’t remember the last time I did so it must have been quite awhile ago, same as Bonnie back in the 80’s!  Actually in Cabo I changed the subject when my age was brought up when a really really young guy was flirting with me.  After finding out he lived where I grew up I instantly asked him what his mom’s name was in case I knew her.  He lied to me thinking I wouldn’t have spoke with him had I known he was only 27 !!!!!  I would have, but I see his point.

Nope, never lied but yes avoided the conversation at times.  I have usually been the age I am turning next.  Technically when you turn 40 you’re in your 41 st year.  I am no longer doing that though, it’s getting kind of scary now.  So ya, I guess I’m my 39th year!  Again! “OUCH”!

~Tracy

Jacquie says…

I’ve never felt the need to lie about my age in the past but I’m going to start now.    Oh, wait a minute, I did tell a bit of a fib when I was 17 and trying to get an agency to take me on in Milan.  I decided to say I was 14, as  at that time really young models were being celebrated in all the magazines.   While visiting one agent he got really disgusted and angry that my parents would allow a 14 year old to travel alone so it kinda backfired on me!  I gave up that scheme pronto.  (You never knew about that one, did ya, mom?)

I’ve always been comfortable revealing my true age but I just think it’s nobody’s business but my own now.  Depends on how the question is asked and why someone wants the info.  I know I’ve probably asked a new acquaintance her age just to get a grasp on where she is in life.  It can give me clues as to how young she was when she had her kids, how her career has progressed and whether or not she liked Donny Osmond or Bobby Sherman as a teen.  Other than that, age is irrelevant.

~jacquie



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My Birthday otherwise known as Valentine’s Day!

heart owned

Valentine’s Day to me is the world of marketing all coming together to remind everyone who has ever met me that my birthday is coming!  I’m sort of kidding.

As a child I was special because I was born on the day of Love!  This special feeling lasted until…. well to be really honest I’m still feelin it.

My Mom and Dad both made a big deal about my birthday and we always celebrated me being their ‘love child’.

I loved the whole idea of sending a Valentine to the boy you had a crush on and hoping he reciprocated.  It took a lot of nerve to actually put the card in the mailbag.

I don’t know if being born on Valentine’s Day is why I love romance but it sure helps.

I will spend the day ballroom dancing, flirting, meeting in secret places for just one passionate kiss and when the oven buzzer goes off and I find myself standing in the kitchen, not the woods with a white horse and ridiculously handsome man next to me, I will take the cupcakes out of the oven and watch my two love children ice them with pink frosting.  Perfect!

pink cupcakesTracy

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