Expose Yourself

Expose yourself screenshot
625565_10151296502307032_1928783634_nBonnie exposed herself last week…don’t rush and click the link to see a naked picture of her, I mean emotionally.

Women tend to share their fears and insecurities with other women, which takes courage and confidence. You take the chance of being judged. Occasionally we meet a man with whom we feel this comfort and we have the best of both worlds. Men on the other hand don’t share quite as easily with their mates as the female energy does. Men are brought up to be manly which unfortunately in society eyes doesn’t always include the expression of emotions. I want a man who can chop wood AND express his thoughts, desires, love, dreams, fears and insecurities <—–to be clear that is not my whole list of what I want my man to be 😉 There is nothing more liberating than being with someone you can say anything to regardless of how intimate or wildly crazy it may seem. When we feel safe, we share. When we share we build trust. Without trust we have nothing.

True raw emotions I believe should be shared. I am guilty of being too much of an open book at times, so balance is important. I am working on keeping my inner feelings to myself a tad longer, just in case they are hormone based shooting out of left field without any prior notice what-so-ever. It’s a struggle let me tell you! I wouldn’t be in some of the predicaments I find myself in if I kept my trap shut a little longer! Live and learn.

However…Our truth is who we are, like it or leave it. When we cease to share who we are, we stand still. It’s super safe…but a bit boring! We miss out on intimacy and moments that will allow us to grow with or without a partner. When we take a chance, the reward can be simply delicious! This is where balance comes in. Keeping a little bit of yourself for a rainy day kinda logic by balancing our truth and living in the moment pure and raw. It doesn’t matter how honest you want to be, sometimes it’s best to keep that thought close to your heart, even for a nanosecond longer before diving face first for that muddy landslide of fun and adventure. <~~~ You have to admit that sounds wayyyyy better than being in the safety zone! So Captain Careful (that’s me) suggests wearing safety goggles before you dive? Excuse me while I go shower off the mud on my face!

When I was in my twenties I wasn’t able to communicate well (go figure!) out of fear of being judged or left for that matter, so I didn’t say much of anything. Sadly in the end the relationship ended because I didn’t communicate, so holding back my words gave me the same result. Fear and insecurities come from a place when we are learning about life and who we are. They sit stagnant within our DNA waiting for a opportunity to expose themselves if we let them. I have worked hard on learning how to communicate well but every now and then I fear being judged and left and I raise my walls and stop communicating to avoid the inevitable! When you search back to the root or beginning of a fear we are able to face those fears and move on from them. “Fear is the Thief of Dreams” ~ Mahatma Gandhi

We all have insecurities and fears as Bonnie mentioned hers being the importance of what people think of her. Valid insecurity, we all want to be liked as human beings. We strive to be accepted and loved. Life is meant to be shared and no one wants to be left alone in life to fend for themselves forever! forever…forever…forever…forever.

I am in the process of facing a few fears of my own. What I have learned in the process is this…I am a survivor, I am able to take care of myself and family all by myself…if need be! I know I don’t have to, if I would just learn to use my words and ask for help when I need it. I am strong, independent, self sufficient and I can do it alone but I am far from alone! I have a huge circle of male and female energy that if I reached out to, would be there with strength and a smile willing to help me.

Sooooo, judge me not unless you have walked in my shoes. Leave me if you choose. I will stand amongst my circle of true companions and live my life in the moment the best way I know how! Knowing I can survive on your own is empowering, admitting I don’t want to is my truth.

Svaha ~

Tracy signiture

 

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Human Touch ~

Skin on Skin…there’s simply no better feeling than the touch of another human being. The light gentle stroke of the index finger following the natural curves of the body like a brush across a blank canvas, painting with sensations that move us! Touching the exposed skin of another human being is something so pure and blissful. The plump little cheeks of a baby or the curve of a women’s breast, are equally inviting to touch. Lose yourself with me for a moment right now and remember a moment when human touch brought shivers up your spine…

The moment we’re born our senses come alive. Sight and hearing develop slower than touch so the feeling of love and touch merge as one, a sensation so strong it’s remembered forever. We simply don’t thrive or fair well without it. From that moment on we use touch to expand and unfold, learning through feeling and being curious by nature. We watch and learn from our parents to see how they touch and interact. Affection is infectious! We mimic what we see. I saw and experienced deep love growing up, which I am forever grateful!

We crave the touch of another human being throughout our lives. It’s such a powerful sense that bonds us to one another. Touch adds a spice that flavours the union between the male and female energy. Touch is communication without words. It stimulates feelings. It reassures, relaxes, comforts, arouses, reduces fears and anxieties and dissipates loneliness. It can be more powerful than hearing the words…”I love you.” 

We hold back our touch when our children enter their teens, thinking it’s not welcomed. They naturally pull away trying to sort out their surging hormones. It’s never easy to let go of our babies. If touch is held back for too long, they begin to feel starved and look elsewhere for that human contact they so desire. Touch may not occur as often as parents would like, but even brief moments help us stay connected.

When girlfriends are affectionate to one another, it strengthens their bond. Simply touching the hand of the elderly can send a warm unconditional feeling of love throughout their entire body. Animals are not exempt when it comes to touch, they thrive when we give them our love.

Falling asleep with your partners arms wrapped around you…touch. Wake up looking for them with your hands, feet and body…touch. Subconsciously getting drawn back into them when you drift apart during the night…touch. Human touch is craved when we are without it for too long. We yearn for the powerful feeling it sends from our core to the tip of our extremities. It can be hard to resist.

Spend the rest of the day conscious of who you touch and how it makes you feel. I guarantee your warmth is not only felt but accepted and embraced with an open heart.

We explore the world with all of our senses but touch is the ultimate sense. An act of love, a way of communicating without words.

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Taking Down Our Walls ~

Before I get into my post I’d like to thank Lawrence for adding his voice to Tara Cronica as a Guest blogger on Monday. Lawrence wrote, How Will Your Smile Inspire, which was about his experience of putting himself back out in the world of being single after being in what I call the ‘cocoon of marriage.’ I love your honest approach to writing Lawrence! Thank you!

Which brings me to my post…

Walls, we all have them. I know I do, I visualize mine as pink! Pink says there is a woman behind there that is strong yet vulnerable, who wants to feel safe and protected. Walls can do that, so can alarms systems and dogs…okay, so can human beings if you’re willing to take the chance. I was recently reminded of the walls I have built so beautifully around myself. I was told that it was time for me to let them down, once and for all! Anyone who reads Tara Cronica or All Thing Sexy and Silver would wonder what walls?

I’ve lost out on more than one relationship in my past because of my walls and not having the ability to express myself. I was not comfortable with feeling vulnerable, but who is? I think deep down we all know we have walls up but when someone points it out to you it’s like putting a spot light on the big pink elephant in the room. It takes over your mind until you acknowledge it and decide you are going to do something about it. Walls go deep beneath the soil to your personal foundation, and below that to the fears that erected the walls in the first place. Only then, when you can identify what the root of the problem is, can your walls be taken down, brick by brick.

Fear is the Thief of Dreams ~Gandhi.

When we experience hurt or pain we justify our walls allowing them to rise higher than before. We use our pain as a scape goat to not face our truth, our fear. When we don’t face our fears we remain behind our walls morphing them into a shield that we learn to carry with us, blocking us from life experience. When we let go of our fears we open ourselves surrendering to what life truly has to offer.

My walls get a fresh coat of paint when feeling surface in a relationship. Feeling vulnerable is the first sign that you care for someone. Allowing yourself to feel vulnerable is a step forward. Embracing it for all it is and what it stirs inside you is a huge jump in the right direction! Not everyone has good intention so it can be hard. Vulnerablity lurks behind us like a shadow…waiting to jump out and scare us back behind our fortress! It feels so safe inside our walls I often wonder why anyone would even dream of taking them down. There is a pay-off when you do, it’s called Intimacy. I am a strong believer that you grow when you step out of your comfort zone. Take chances, live with no regret, feel all emotion, experience love and loss! Life is Meant to be Shared not hidden from behind walls.

We are all a work in progress in this marvellous thing we call life. It can feel hard to navigate at times on our own. That is why we need to share ourselves with others. I have learned a great deal about myself through those who I’ve connected with over the years. Never underestimate the power of a connection, no matter how small it may seem in the moment. We enter each others lives for a purpose, teaching and learning from one another.

I know the walls that have protected and sheltered me from my fears deep inside are just a facade. I have become aware of them and in doing so I can comfortably let them down. I choose to be open, no wall between me and life experience. I still want a symbolic wall in my life, that of a man who will wrap his strength around me when I need to feel protected, and give me a gentle nudge when I get too comfortable…he will be the only wall I take refuge in.


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“You Want Happy Ending?”

“Once Upon a time in a far away land, way up high in the hills there lived a woman who thought a man could make all her dreams come true, and then she woke up with the entire King sized bed to herself. She smiled as she stretched her leg out to the cold spot…Su-weeeeet! ”  It’s all about perspective…

I am no longer looking for a fairytale ending, a ‘happy ending’ would suffice. 😉 When it comes to fairytales it’s not that kind of ending we want, it’s the happily ever after we’re looking for. You have to be happy within yourself if you want to naturally attract someone to join you on the journey to happily ever after, which includes ‘happy endings’ by the way! Good motivation…right?

Focus on where you are right now. What makes YOU happy? I am happy when I am doing something creative, near the ocean, laughing out loud with friends, when I’m healthy, inspiring others and creating memories with my family. Add a great guy to this picture and I am happy, take him out of the picture and hey I’m still happy. Figure out what makes YOU happy first before you add someone else to the mix. A delicious life is irresistible!

I MAKE ME HAPPY ~

Romance for me has always gone hand in hand with happiness. Life is about love and not giving into fear. Fear distances us from real happiness. And romance doesn’t necessarily lead to love. You can’t control who you fall in love with and shouldn’t want to control the one you love.

Fairytales are read to us to give us hope that although life has it’s struggles, we can connect with someone along the way and ‘live happily ever after.’ They allow us to spread our wings as human beings, have faith in love and take chances. They let us believe in something wonderful…for a while until reality rears it’s ugly head!

Even when life has its way of bringing us back to reality, we can find happiness within the chaos. We just need to go back to the basics of being happy within.

Beginning are filled with flirty excitement, passion, lust and desire and all the juicy stuff. Middles are where the lessons are learned, progress is made, evolving and unfolding is done, substance is recognized, bonding occurs and romance takes a step forward towards love. As for the ending, true love has no end.

I am finally happy with who I am and can open myself to romantic adventure that makes my heart beat right out of my chest without the expectation of it being my source of happiness. Happiness starts from within, from there it is completely up to you which direction you go. Ultimately YOU choose whether or not to be happy. Regardless of whether or not there is a man romantically tied to me, I will always choose to be happy. I will live happily ever after…

The End Beginning ~

 

 

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