When I think of the word ‘obsession’ I think of an action or thought or feeling that is all-consuming and thereby counterproductive. So, yeah, of course I’ve been obsessed a few times in my life!
The biggest obsessions I’ve had have revolved around my kids. I’m a bit of a collector by nature and so when my girls got into beanie babies 10 years ago I thought I’d surprise them by picking up a few of the really hard to find ones on eBay. It was an incredible rush to go through the auction process, only to lose out at the last minute to the more savvy bidders who knew all the tricks. I made it my personal goal to learn how to win and as a result I was able to get some of the most coveted items. Unfortunately, my girls had lost interest in the meantime. I soon realized that I had taken away all the fun for them because it was no longer about cherishing what they’d been able to find on their own.
I’ve collected everything from carnival glass, beads, paints, fabric and china just because I like the texture and the colors. My china is all different patterns because I could never decide on just one look and I like to go to flea markets when out of town. I used to be obsessed with finding just the right new dinner plates. I now actually say a little mantra when I feel the urge to pick up something ~ ”Will this really make your life better?” The answer is now “No, I like it but I can be happy without it”.
Someone out there will immediately know what having an obsession with collecting means. I think I have a pretty good idea myself. I’ve watched enough Oprah to have that figured out!
Bonnie’s two cents~
- the domination of one’s thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, image, desire, etc.
- the idea, image, desire, feeling, etc., itself.
- the state of being obsessed.
- the act of obsessing.
Well when you put it that way I guess I have. I was once obsessed with a thought. A kind of doomsday thought. The seed for this thought was planted years ago by a psychic I had visited a few times. The thing with this particular psychic was that she was pretty darned accurate most of the time, some might even say “spot on” in many of her predictions.
I visited her a couple of years before I met my husband John and she told me that I would meet the “one” within the next couple of years. Check. She told me she saw me living in a white house beside the water with this love of my life. Check. I was a single mother of one when I spoke to her but she said I would have four children. This made me laugh. I had not considered step children at that point. Four children. Check. One thing she said, that I didn’t think much about at the time but that would later become my obsession, was this: “You will have a wonderfully happy life with this man…but it will end too soon. It will not be a long enough relationship for you.” She didn’t get into details, in fact that was all she would say about that, and I put it out of my mind. Until I was with John, living in our white house beside the lake when it hit me. All the things she’d predicted had come true! So now when was this relationship going to come to a sudden halt? The only way I could imagine that happening was if John was to die on me. And there it was. The beginning of my obsession with the thought that my John would die early and break my heart. He travels a lot with work and so every time he was leaving to go away I would sob and worry that I would never see him again. I was like this for years. It’s exhausting worrying about ridiculous things. Poor John kept telling me to stop imagining him with one foot in the grave. Then I started to worry that it might come true simply because I gave the thought too much of my focus and energy…power of attraction…that kind of thing. I was going crazy. Maybe that would be how it ended too soon. John had to commit me.
I’ve finally stopped the craziness and I don’t obsess over the thought of losing John anymore…much…no really…hardly ever…no…never at all anymore.
I have to share with you the wonderful positive thing that came of all of this obsessing. I have always (and still do) absolutely appreciated every moment that I spend with my husband. My silly fear taught me a great lesson in appreciation and when you are always in appreciation of someone it makes for a very strong bond of love.
Yes, I have had an Obsession! His name starts with the letter…I am kidding! My real obsession was with exercise. This particular time it had a negative effects on my body and here is why. I was heading off to Cabo with Jacquie last year around this time and as soon as I booked my ticket I started to work out really, really hard. Working out for me has always been part of my life but this was more than I was used to. I did a intense stair routine for an 1 hour at the local track 3 days a week and ran 3 days a week anywhere from 5 -10 K. I literally lived in my running gear!
When I look back I see that I was obsessed, but at the time I was just stepping it up a bit. By doing this I completely threw my hormones out of balance. My endocrine system was turned upside down. I had my menstrual cycle for 48 days straight and then not at all for 3 months. Nothing should bleed for that long and live…seriously! It was a real concern for about 6 months. I sought help from my Doctor with no luck in finding out what was going on. I must admit I got very impatient. I was put on birth control pills to try to balance my cycle. Test after test, throw a day surgery in there for fun and still no resolution for me. I finally went to see a Naturopathic Doctor who had balanced my Thyroid after being Hypothyroid after child birth.(slow metabolism no matter how hard you work out you don’t lose an ounce! It sucked big time) He balanced that naturally so I gave him another try. I needed to cleanse my system or as he put it take out the garbage and reboot my endocrine system like we do our computers after they crash. I did a kidney cleanse and took a natural capsule that binds excess estrogen in your system and I was regular a month later and have been since. That was my obsession, exercise. Moderation is key!