Happy Halloween ~ Jib Jab!

Every 'other' girl at the party...

...and then there is me...no NOT the Paper-bag Princess...I'm the Unknown Cougar (like the Unknown Comic?) Anyone get it?

Happy Halloween! I am NOT a big fan of Halloween. It could be that I’ve had my fair share of treats over the years and when I see them in the grocery store it just makes me go Ugh! Halloween for me = zits and a tight waste band! It’s just way too easy to polish off an entire box of 100 six weeks before you actually need them. Note to self: DO NOT BUY HALLOWEEN TREATS BEFORE OCTOBER 31st @ 6PM!!! (If the store is out…consider yourself lucky!)

I don’t like the dressing up part of AT ALL! I appeased my daughter who LOVES Halloween by buying a Vampire Cape, it was either that or a sexy_______ fill in the blank. I know…false hope, I won’t wear it unless I make it funny somehow. Fat chance of that happening with such short notice. I was thinking I’d like to pull a “Modern Family” scare the crap out of the little kids in our neighborhood since I’m moving, but they’re always so damn cute I don’t think I could do it. It would be like pulling the trigger on Bambi 😉

Every Halloween memories come rushing back that remind me why I am not a fan…Pregnant Princess, Halloween’68 is the year I knew I was odd and my dreams were crushed. All the neighbors asked what I was, like it wasn’t obvious? They looked at me with question about my unusual combination, whats not to get about a Pregnant Princess? Made perfect sense to me!

It could have been Mr Milner Halloween ’71, countering our “trick or treat” with “TRICK” when we knocked at his door! Trick? Wt? Just give out the damn candy! We weren’t a circus act we just wanted a 2-cent chocolate! Two years of that and his house was nixed! We should have told him there were houses that gave out cans of pop and full size chocolate bars that didn’t make us work for it! Trick? Really? I was really shy when I was little so that put me over the edge each year! No wonder I don’t like auditions! I wonder what kids would say now if you said TRICK? I don’t think they’d even get it! They would stand in a group looking at each other confused until one of them whispered “What did she just say?” another would say under his breath “I’m not sure?” Then the smart-ass in the group would talk really loud like I was hard of hearing and say “SHE S-A-Y-S WE LOOK REALLY T-r-i-c-k…thanks Ma’am now give us the damn candy!”

It might have been ‘Mark VanOord’ Halloween’79 the year my school girl crush finally kissed me. The kiss I daydreamed about for years and when I finally got it, much to my dismay I dressed up as a clown that year…a 16 year old clown!

Maybe it was Stargate Halloween’96 when I dressed up as a crappy kick-boxer, head-gear (really attractive) chest pad (flattering) and mouth guard (nice) with bruises all over my face and every other female in the room was in full Renaissance attire, wigs and parasols.

I was always the girl who showed up in a funny costume not a sexy one. (its possible or likely I am in denial now but that’s my story and I’m stickin to it) I did however dress up last year as a ‘cougar’ and thought that was funny…kinda sexy, Bonnie said I just looked cheap! LMAO!

Be safe trick or treating tonight! I can’t resist Jib Jab! So here it is, from me to you! I apologize in advance to my kids and Bonnie’s kid for using them for my own entertainment purposes! Chances are they won’t even see it until it’s too late so what the hell!

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Critter Cove

There has been a lot of animal action around our place lately.  And before your mind goes down the wrong path let me explain.

I feel like I’m living in an episode of Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom. Critters seem to be invading our neighbourhood.  Most of them are welcome, like the mother robin who sits on her eggs right out side our bedroom window. Others are not quite as welcome like the pack rat that my husband is feeding trying to trap down by the cabin and the dozen or so Canadian Geese that poop all over our dock.

It began with the cutest little chipmunk getting himself caught up in some mesh in my garden.  Luckily my friend, Lorellei, had her brother visiting from Australia and he has a soft spot for animals in need of rescue.  Craig told me that he often sees koala bears that have been hit by cars lying on the side of the road and he always stops and checks their pouch for babies.  When he finds babies in the pouch still alive he takes them to a local animal rescue sanctuary.  Awwww! How sweet is that! I knew he was the right man for the job.

A week later while I sat in the back yard lounging with my book, a little chipmunk came right up to my chair and looked at me for awhile, then ran under my chair and all around me.  I’m convinced it was the same one we rescued coming to visit and say thank you.

Our next door neighbour has had a family of racoons living under his house. There has been a great deal of excitement when any of these masked bandits wander into the trap cage set up in his yard. Two walked into the cage while we were all visiting only a few feet away a couple of nights ago. Our Aussie friend Craig and his brother in law Barry have then been transporting the trapped racoons to another location far away and releasing them back into nature.  They may be a nuisance but you have to admit they are pretty cute. Here is one little guy safe in a tree after his relocation.

Last night our neighbours called us over to show us the turtle that had come out of the lake and miraculously crossed the road to their yard.

Yesterday while we sat on the end of the dock osprey floated above us looking for fish.  This morning there was one sitting in the tree outside the cabin.  Tracy took this picture of him.

Walking to the lake shore at dusk the other night, a bat collided with my cheek, fumbled to get free of my hair and then was gone.  I’m sure the bat was as freaked out as I was.  It took a while to normalize my heart rate after that.

Then there are the coyote howls coming from the hills behind our house and the ridiculous amount of deer we see all around us.

I’m not complaining. I love the opportunity to get close to most of these critters.  I draw the line at cougars and bears though and so far, gratefully, they’ve stayed away.

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Which Stereotype would you NOT want people to include you in?

Which stereotype would you NOT want to be included in?

Take your pick there are many!  Here are a few examples, dumb blonde, gold digger and one of my favorites cougar!

Tracy’s take~

Tracy Throughout my late teens and twenties I bent over backwards so girls would not judge or stereotype  me before they knew me all in the name of stereotyping.  I would make myself look silly with humour to make them smile at me instead of leer at me.  It got tiring and I eventually just called it quits.  I just figured if you don’t want to take the time to get to know me then that’s unfortunate because we could be friends.  I HATE when people stereotype  or judge for that matter!

With that being said at this point in my life ‘single mom looking for a man to take care of me’ would be one of the worst for me.  No other stereotype would bother me as much as this one.  Call me a ‘Cougar’ and I would not only agree, say “whyy not” and smile while looking you up and down sexually, call me a dumb blonde and I would manipulate you to get what I want, but think I need a man to take care of me…sheesh!!   Men are in my life by CHOICE not need!  I am a very independent and self sufficient woman who loves time alone.  I don’t need a man in my life to take care of me but I do look forward to having  men in my life to spend time and enjoying the moment for what it is.  So if I am single for the back 50 I’m good.  How about you Bonnie which stereotype don’t you want to be included in?

Bonnie’s two cents~

Bonnie's PostDon’t include me in any! I mean I can’t actually think of a stereotype I’d like to be slotted as.  I’m pretty sure I’ve fit a few of them in my life so far though.  Dumb blonde? I’ve had my moments.  Cougar?  Oh ya.  Gold digger?  I think you have to go out with really wealthy men for that, so I don’t think so.  White people can’t dance?  Hey, I think I look pretty good out there.

The bottom line is stereotyping  is just a lazy way of labeling someone.  So many people are quick to do this because they feel they need to assign you a category so they know where they fit in.  “She’s a gold digger.  I’m better than that.”   Tsk!

A stereotype is just a simplified and standardized conception.  Period.  It is not necessarily the truth.

Ok, so I’m probably getting too philosophical about this but it’s something I’ve thought a lot about recently thanks to Jacquie.  She was concerned I was stereotyping when I recently used the word “native” in one of my posts.  I disagreed and dug my heels in but I thought about what she said and I could see her point of view.  Stereotyping is not a good thing…although…I’ve never known an African American male to cry fowl over the “well endowed” stereotype.  I’m just sayin’!

Jacquie’s thoughts~

Jacquie JanzenYee

I’ve been aware of the negative impact stereotyping can have for a very long time.  When I was dating my now-husband, Gavin, his mother was not a happy camper (do Chinese people ever like to camp?).   His Asian mother, who is an absolutely fabulous person, really wanted him to get rid of me, the White Ghost, aka Lo fan.  Crikey!  I was just being sweet l’il ol’ me but my blondness was working against me for the first time!  You see, she believed Caucasian women didn’t know how to take care of the house properly, didn’t do the cooking, didn’t take care of the children but sent them to nannies instead, cheated and got divorced.   No matter how ‘nice’ she thought I was, I would never be good wife material.

Well,  in some ways she was right.  I don’t cook very much now that the kids are older, I’d rather paint or do something fun than spend everyday scrubbing, I do like having guy friends and I won’t fib and say that the big ‘D’ has never crossed my mind as a viable alternative on really bad days, though it’s been a while since I felt that way.  I was being…stereotyped… but this time it was working against me!   It’s been many years and I know she loves me now and sees me as an individual and not just as a white girl, but it did take time.

Stereotypes are labels thrust on individuals or groups to make them easier to understand.  Like Bonnie said, they make figuring out your own place in the world simpler, so they’re self-serving, really.  I know I’m not a stereotypical mom with 3 kids and a dog even though that’s basically what I am on paper.  What else?  Well, like most of the women I know, I wear a lot of different hats depending on the day of the week or the mood I’m in.  Sometimes I’m ‘Ditzy Artist’.  ‘Dumb Blonde’ has served me well over the years when I’ve needed to pull her out.

I don’t mind acting out a stereotype every now and then when I’m in charge of the play.  What I don’t care for are stereotypes that are forced on me.  I don’t like going out with my girlfriends for some music and drinks and being called a cougar.  I find it derogatory, frankly.  Being stereotyped takes away your power and is belittling.  Now, if you want to call yourself a dumb blonde or a cougar then that’s different.  You’re taking back your power.  It’s all about the context in which these terms are used.


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