Other Peoples Relationships; Can You Relate?

I guess I better start this with “my relationship with my husband is better than ever” just in case some of you jump to conclusions and then don’t continue reading.

I don’t know if it is something that happens to more women our age or maybe it’s always been happening and I had just been too busy with my own failing relationships before to notice it, but right now I know a lot of women my age who are unhappy in their relationships with their husband/partner.

This makes me sad.  I want everyone to be happy.  Especially when I’m happy.  When I’m miserable I’m ok with everyone else being miserable too, in fact I prefer it that way.  Kidding…kind of.

I always hope I’m saying the right thing when a friend confides her marriage/relationship woes to me. The advice I go back to again and again is pretty basic.  Everyone deserves to be happy.  Find a way to be happy.  With ‘em or without ‘em just be happy.  I don’t like to see people waste years and years being unhappy.  Strive for the happy!

That advice may be a little too basic for some.  More.com recently listed 10 books on relationships.  Sometimes you need to read about other people’s relationships before coming face to face with your own. Good idea, I say!

Ever wonder what the future holds for your marriage? Journalist Maggie Scarf interviews numerous couples between the ages of 50 and 75 in this well researched study.

The troubles of 5 couples are brought to life by Abraham in this close look at couples therapy, making this an important book on the institute of modern marriage.

How does one handle the shell shock of divorce? For Morrison, the answer was to keep moving. You’ll sympathize with her honest musings on learning how to fall out of love, a demanding career, and caring for her young son.

Commitment-phobe Gilbert waxes on about domesticity with Brazilian beau, Felipe, while simultaneously researching the history of marriage and divorce.

After spending a year cooking with Julia, Powell takes an apprenticeship with a butcher shop. Tales of her adult sex life are interwoven with detailed reports of her time spent with the chopping block.

He said, she said; most books that follow this format can weigh on one’s patience. But in the case of Carbone and Decker’s tale of fertility clinics, miscarriages, and near-divorce spats, hearing both sides of the story humanizes their anger.

Braestrup, an ordained minister, clues us into the secrets she’s learned from years of counseling couples. Here, she shows us the true meaning of love, and in some cases, how to find it.

In throes of midlife, Gideon humorously wonders, “is this all there is?” A quick, enjoyable read for women dealing with children, dogs, and yes, husbands.

Before she felt bad about her neck, Ephron was feeling the pangs of a cheating husband. A thinly veiled version of her own marriage’s demise, Ephron’s biggest quip (and perhaps her funniest) is that at 7 months pregnant, she can’t date.

After struggling with infertility for years, Cohen finds herself unexpectedly pregnant at 44. With a daughter and fiance in tow, Cohen questions her ability to bring a baby into the world.

Disclaimer: I have not yet read any of the above so I will default to my usual…just find your happiness.  Whatever it takes, be happy.  That means you too Sandra Bullock!

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5 thoughts on “Other Peoples Relationships; Can You Relate?

  1. I agree everyone should be happy in their marriage. I see it everyday with my parents being unhappy with each other. Its depressing.

    While looking at the books covers I must admit that even though I dont need them (Im not married) they look very interesting. They all have something that catches my eye. Maybe its the very simple look of them or all the different colors but I like the covers.

    • I know it’s hard watching your parents unhappy…I did it my whole life too. It’s something I’ve come to realize I can’t control so I worry about it less. I hadn’t noticed before how all the covers were kept simple. Funny. I wonder if there is a reason for that…like a gentle draw for people in turmoil. 🙂

  2. The hardest thing to do is comment on other people’s relationships. I think I’d find the books written in first person most interesting, like “What I Thought I Knew”; one person’s story about their own situation and how they dealt with things. My feeling is when girlfriends talk about being unhappy, the best thing I can do is listen and be supportive, but I also try to slip in that no one can make you happy if you’re not happy with yourself. Before you give up on a relationship, make sure you’re doing everything in your power to find out why it didn’t work. You may find the problem isn’t the guy but your own issues.
    Very interesting topic, Bonnie.

    • I am a total listener when It comes to other peoples problems as well. It took me a long time to figure out why my last relationship failed. At first I thought it was because I got cancer but it had nothing really to do with that. We had problems before and it had to do with my own issues. I had things about myself I needed to fix and it made it harder to fix them when I ended up living with him. Now that we are friends and I have time to work on my own issues we get along great on a friend to friend basis.

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